New Rogues In Town

Chapter 27:You're the girl

I sat on the edge of the bed gripping the black ruffled comforter. I ran my sweating hands over the material nervously. The silk fibers made a whistling noise as I rubbed it between my thumb and forefinger. I knew after I told them that every time I healed a person, I decreased time off of my life, therefore increasing my death rate. I had a feeling that they wouldn't exactly agree with my blatant disregard for my own life. Although, technically it wasn't about a choice to personally live or die. It was a choice however, to heal others or let them die, which has proven difficult for me thus far.

I stared past the threshold of our bedroom waiting anxiously for Carter and Joya to arrive. It didn't take long before they both emerged from the darkness of the hall and the oxygen seemed to be sucked out of the room. It was now or never. Of course, I preferred never, but I knew that wasn't a possibility.

"Cat, are you okay. You look awfully pale." Joya inquired touching my face like the motherly type she is.

"Yeah um, do you guys wanna sit down?"

As they sat beside me, I stood, unable to contain the rapid rate at which my cells were moving due to my anxiety. Surely my brain was just over reacting. It's not like they were going to lock me in the basement and refuse to let me socialize or be free. Right? I panicked even more at my own thoughts. Would they strip me of my humanity, or wolf-munity I guess you could say? I think I feared the loss of independence more than the actual loss of interaction.

"You have something to tell us?" Carter asked. "Go ahead."

And so I told them, rushing through every intricate detail. I told them what the Healer's guide said about how the physical as well as emotional ailments of others could drain my energy if I entertained them. Until now, I had been practically in solitude so it wasn't affecting me until recently. I told them how healing Cassie had left me physically incompetent for several hours which caused my sleeping spell, which I had lied about. I promised I wouldn't keep anything else from them. I reassured them that I had no plans of healing anyone else unless it was one of them and that I would take every precaution to keep from getting sick. I also told them that the only reason I wasn't so ill now was because of Toby and that Arleigha chick, that also shared my healing ability, and about the drink she concocted to help center and rejuvenate the healing process. Lastly, I promised that if they wouldn't strip me of all my pride and freedom that I would do anything they asked, including be more touchy feely and emotional. In finality, I took a deep breath and once again said "I'm sorry."

We all stared each other for a whole. The silence seemed infinite and I worried things would be worse than I assumed. I glanced between the two trying to gain some type of reaction by gauging their facial expressions. Neither have away anything except for the fact they were having their own silent conversation. even that was noticeably subtle. I could only stand there and wait for a verdict. It might as well put my prison stripes on and join the show Black is the New Orange.

"I'd be lying if I said I wasn't devastatingly hurt. I've known you 23 years Cat. You were my first, last, and only everything until Carter. I have sat statuesque and while you made the moves and led us around. I am in no way complaining or diminishing your efforts that kept us alive. But you had absolutely no right, not one to keep this from me. I feel betrayed, heartbroken, but most of all belittled, like I wasn't worthy enough for you to trust that secret with me."

"But" I tried to interject but Joya put her hand up with all five finger erect in sign for me to stop and continued.

"And with all that said, I forgive you. I don't understand why you didn't tell me and it's not okay. Hell, it's far from okay, but I will forgive you."

With that, she stood and crossed the room. She placed a soft kiss on my cheek and I turned to look at her. Her coal colored eyes big and doe like stared into mine. They twinkled with the dew of tears unfallen. I dropped eye contact first. I was ashamed and remorseful that I had hurt her. I heard her soft lightly treading footsteps as she walked out of the room and quietly closed the door. The whisper of the latch catching on the frame as the knob was released was the final sound that caused the dreadful emotions to start flooding up my body from my heart, through my veins and spilled out of my eyes. I had finally broken the one person in my life that had never hurt me. She was my refuge and I tore her down with my lies like she was a piece of biodegradable paper. I sunk to my knees in agonizing realization. I was one fucked up individual.

Carter's arms enveloped me on the floor, wrapping me tightly into the nurturing cocoon I so hopelessly needed. I sobbed into his chest like a child who lost their favorite blankey. He combed his fingers through my hair, comforting and quieting my anguish as best he could. What I loved most about Carter is he never tried to pacify me. He didn’t pretend it would all be okay or feed me false fables of glitter and rainbows. He never pitied me. He sat there and just simply held me.

Eventually the tears subsided and ironically they morphed into bits of laughter. Once again, I couldn’t contain my emotions. The thing that was so comical to me is that it seemed Carter and Joya had switched roles. Normally, she would be the one on the floor comforting me after Carter stormed out. I looked up at him while childishly wiping my wet face and sinus drainage on my sleeve like a three year old. My laughter now fading into nonexistence.

“You’re the girl.” I said pointing at him and smiling at my emasculating mate, my Alpha.

“And you’re a strange, stubborn, scared little girl.” He countered making my smile drop. I lowered my head to look at my lap like a child would when being scolded. He slipped his finger under my chin and lifted my head until I met his gaze. “And I love you just the same.”

“I love you too.”

“Joya will come around you know. She is just really hurt right now.”

“I know.”

“She loves you.”

“I know.”

“Well damn, don’t you know everything?”

I chuckled. “Well not everything, but pretty close to it.”

“I’m sorry to interrupt…” Joya’s voice floats into the room. Her clipped tone brings me back to reality. “But Cassie is down stairs and knows Cat is back. She wants to visit with her.”

Carter’s eyes linger on me briefly, apologetically, before he stands and extends his hand to help me up to my feet. I glance in Joya’s direction but she busies herself pulling at the hem of her shirt and furiously scrubbing at an invisible stain.

“Well, let us not keep my sweet darling baby sister waiting.” He said in a fake British accent while linking his arm through mine.

Joya exited once again followed by Carter and I. He turned to look at me one more time before descending the stairs, stopping us. I watched Joya’s retreating back before I glanced over at Carter.

“She really will come around. Everything is going to be okay. The pup is just messing with her hormones.”

“I heard that.” She yelled back over her shoulder.

Carter’s face was a mixture between amusement and fear but we both laughed.

When I reached the bottom of the stairs, I was immediately engulfed in hugs. Luke and Jemma, Carter’s parents, had apparently been listening through the mind link that for the life of me I cannot seem to control. Jemma was crying a little. I had no idea why. It wasn’t like I was dying now. I had felt completely fine since I healed Cassie, thanks to the special herb. I didn’t plan on dying anytime soon. Plus, even if I did, I honestly didn’t think it would matter to them. It was very unlikely that they were the presidents of my fan club for sure. I mean after all, look what I put them through, their pack through, their family, their son. Worst daughter-in-law award goes to…raises my hand and waves around wildly.

“It’s going to be okay Cat. We love you.” Jemma says wiping the clear wet form of emotion off her face. “I never got the chance to tell you thank you for what you did for Cassie. You gave me my daughter back. Now that I know the risk you took so selflessly, I could never repay you. There are not enough words in the world to thank you enough.”

I didn’t know what to say so I just nodded. Maybe they didn’t hate me too much after all.

“So a girl finally gets healed from a terminal illness and people just stop paying her visits.” A tender voice spoke from behind Luke and Jemma.

They parted to reveal Cassie standing with an aesthetic smile gracing her delicate face. She immediately engulfed me in a hug that was surprisingly strong for a teenage human girl. My arms lifted at their own accord and made their way around Cassie’s tiny but healthy frame. In this moment I realized that everything up until this point was all worth it.