Flashback- Suzumi
Lying in bed, I close my eyes. I can tell tonight is going to be a bad one. It's a feeling deep in my bones so I have no choice but to focus on my breathing. Let my mind empty itself of all the trouble so I can fill it with the important stuff.
Remember the training. Sleep well tonight. Remember the training. Sleep well tonight.
With an empty mind, the sleep comes easily, my brain finding it simple enough to shut down for the night, and then it comes. The yellow barrier, the fog coming closer and closer until any second now-
The panic takes hold as it always does, making everything come in flashes that terrify and fade as if they never happened. I'm so scared already but I don't know why. Not yet. But I will.
"Allow yourself to feel the fear."
Yes. Let it flow through me.
"There is nothing wrong with fear, only in letting it control you."
Yes. I won't let anything control me. I am in charge of me now, nobody, nothing else. Just me.
"Now swallow back the tears. Don't show your weaknesses, they're far too easy to step on."
Yes. An enemy will not hesitate to use a weakness against you so if you're unlucky enough to have one, it must remain hidden. And since I am my greatest enemy, I can not allow myself to show weakness. The fear, the tears. I can't have that anymore, not that can be seen anyway.
"The only person here is you, you're alone and that is what makes you safe. Just you, the powerful villain staring back through the mirror."
Yes. Of course. My safety is my own, if I leave it in my hands I am safe. Relying on others can only lead to danger; wild cards and loose cannons are not permitted.
Just breathe. Live. And accept.
The flashes freeze, they come into focus and the video forms, surrounding me so I can see properly. There's still the yellow fog, the haze, but it's much thinner now— except around my feet where it's more soupy— more of a tint on this world. This world of horrors waiting to unfold so I can bear witness and maybe change it all, who knows what the point of all these dreams are?
Stay focused.
"There is no place for weakness here, no place for a crying, little girl. You must leave it behind to fulfil your new purpose. Overpower it, overpower yourself and there is nothing you won't be able to accomplish."
It's true I want to leave weakness behind. But there are some things I'd rather keep, things you think are already long gone. Because there are people waiting for me, believe it or not, a family who care for me, who miss me and I them.
The family I chose.
The horrors are revealed to me slowly, pain, suffering, any horrible and depressing thing you can think of, I've seen it here in these dreams. I sometimes wonder if I'd prefer it if I'd never learnt how to remember them. I watch and listen and learn. I see the warning signs, look for dates and then when I wake up a few hours later, it all goes into my book: mum's diary, which is hidden away in a distant place my teacher will never find.
Then I lay in bed, staring up at the veins of cracks in the ceiling I know by heart and wait for my teacher to walk in for another day of fun after my bleak night. Wish me luck.
Present- Narrator
"What have you done this time?" came the disgruntled voice from the other end of the phone. The disgruntled voice that sounded vaguely familiar.
"Um... hello?" Midoriya responded uncertainly.
"Hello, who is this?" the voice demanded, it was definitely a female voice from the sounds of it.
YOU ARE READING
In My Veins (bnha x oc)
FanfictionHirota Suzumi, additional member of class 1-A bringing their numbers to an awkward 21 because she wasn't really meant to be there but surprisingly, the class accepted her easily enough. Soon though, a terrible incident sets off a chain of events tha...
