Jess and I sit beside each other on her mother's sofa. Every time that I look at her, all I see is my friend who has cancer. It pains me to admit that to myself because that's the reason why she didn't tell me in the first place.
But, she could die from this illness or even the treatment. The thing that gets me is that she's gone through this all before, and I didn't know.
"Tomorrow's the big day huh" I start slowly.
The day of the transfusion. A risky procedure but she's gotta do what she's gotta do to beat this.
"Yeah" Jess nods, "dad's going to take me to the hospital tonight..."
Tonight? Wow, this is really happening. My heart begins beating slightly faster in fear.
"So how exactly is this going to work?" I attempt to remain calm.
"Back to back," Jess says, "as soon as they finish with Tyler, they will start the transfusion"
"How long will you be in the hospital for?" I lower my voice.
"Till my blood counts come up...might take a few weeks," she explains, "then I'll have to visit every day for tests"
"Right" I nod as putting our calculus books onto the coffee table that sits only a few feet in front of us, "I'll come every day after school...to the hospital"
I have to if I want Jess to graduate with the rest of us. Otherwise, she'll fall too far behind and will need to repeat senior year.
"I'll be in isolation...you'll have to wear masks and gloves" she admits as hugging her grey hoodie.
"Not a problem" I assure, "And you don't need to worry about me telling anyone, your secret is safe with me"
"Thank you" she smiles. "And remember...you've gotta give me updates on everybody...it'll be three months till I can go back to school"
"Three months is a long time," I say softly.
It's only October. Three months means that she'll be back at school in January. So much can happen in three months.
Jess needs to stay with her dad for the entire time, due to being half an hour away from the clinic.
I honestly don't mind helping her with everything. I'm so used to helping people, it's become my second nature. It started out as a chore but is now something that I genuinely enjoy.
"How's the studying coming along?" Her father grows closer towards us.
I shoot my head up to find the man in a suit, probably just came home from work.
"fine" Jess leans back into the sofa with folded arms and a half smile.
Jess has been in and out of hospitals for years. Some patients see hospitals as a second home, others see it as a prison. Jess is the second type. I know that the last thing that she wants is to go tonight. How can I make this whole experience less painful?
I stand up and begin taking a few steps towards the man. "Can I talk to you for a second?" I request. He responds with a small as we making our way through the hallway, "let me take her to the hospital tonight" I beg.
"Wh-" he widens his eyes.
"She'll be calmer with me...please" I soften my gaze at her father.
My heart beats faster, I gulp in fear. My ears are filled with a loud silence that seems to last a lifetime.
"Yeah" he agrees, "okay"
"Thank you" I sigh in relief as re-entering the room beside him, "good news" I smile at Jess.
"What?" She cocks a brow with slight concern in her voice.
I love Jess's smile, too bad I don't see it often enough.
"Well," I begin as sitting beside her on the sofa, "how do you feel about me taking you to the hospital instead?"
"Really" she smiles in excitement as glancing at her father who stood across the room.
"Yeah" he nods with a half smile.
Jess is going to be isolated for months. It's up to Tyler and me to do all that we can to keep her happy. If it means being with it during hospital visits then so be it.
"Jason?" a familiar voice cries from across the room.
I look up to see Tyler with arms folded, and narrowed eyes. He seems confused to see me. It seems that both Jess and I failed to mention that I know about her illness.
***
"I do admire what you're doing," I say in a hushed tone as we stand at the front of his home, away from Jess.
"I do what I gotta do...nothing more nothing less" Tyler looks down at his shoes.
The cold breeze brushes against my skin as the moon rises.
"I didn't mean being her donor" I furrow my brows, "I meant keeping it all a secret...as she wishes"
"She doesn't want anyone to know...I respect that" he nods, "we've all got things we don't want people to know"
He looks at me as if he knows something. I firm my gaze cautiously. Does he know something?
"What do you-" I start with narrowed eyes.
"Come on we better get a move on" Tyler adjusts his posture before beginning to enter his home.
My eyes widen as I look up at the sky. I feel my chest tighten as the thought of Tyler knowing my past enters my mind. I don't know why it terrifies me so much.
I guess that I'm a little hypocritical in that sense. I encourage Jess to be open with me when I physically can't open up to anyone about my past.
---------------------------------
Hi all,
Throughout this book, I have hinted at Jason suffering from anxiety. This is a common consequence amongst those who have been physically abused.
Other consequences include depression, attachment problems, substance and/or alcohol abuse, ADHD, eating disorders, feelings of shame and self-blame, aggression and violence, and so on.
If you yourself or someone you know are a victim of domestic violence please use a service listed below (apologies if your country is not listed):
Australia Nationwide: 1800 RESPECT https://www.1800respect.org.au/
USA Nationwide: National Domestic Violence Hotline https://www.thehotline.org/
UK Nationwide: Domestic Violence Helpline http://www.nationaldomesticviolencehelpline.org.uk/
New Zealand Nationwide: Domestic Violence Crisis Line
https://womensrefuge.org.nz/
Canada: https://www.gov.mb.ca/stoptheviolence/index.html
Thank you
YOU ARE READING
The Guarded One ✔
Teen FictionThey say that when guarded people let you in, it's not because they need you. They stopped needing people along time ago. It's because they want you. Jason Sanders' life was anything but simple. After escaping his abusive father, he moves to San Fra...
