40 | what next?

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40 | what next?

you fit me

"Remember when we used to come down here?" Axel asks me, his arm around my shoulder, my head in the crook of his neck

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"Remember when we used to come down here?" Axel asks me, his arm around my shoulder, my head in the crook of his neck. We're sitting on the boardwalk in Cali like we used to when we dated in high school. We'd just come here, look out at the water, not too close, not too far, and just talk. We'd talk for hours, or sometimes, when one or both us wasn't feeling like talking or doing anything, we'd just sit here, holding each other, looking at the sun set and hope that when it rose the next day it would bring better things. 

Obviously, I never wished for better things. I already knew, the moment I realized I loved Axel, that I'd already gotten the better things. He was the better thing. He still is. 

I nod against his shoulder. "It's so peaceful. I loved just being here with you."

Axel glances down at me, and pecks the top of my head. "I feel like a part of us will always stay in Cali. I mean for me, I grew up here. My mom's buried here. As much as I wanted to get away, I like being back once in awhile. Now that your parents are moving, I don't know if I have a good excuse to come back."

I chuckle, folding my hands around his. "We'll come back for us, babe. Plus, Tasha's still close. Nicole. Helen. They're in LA. We're not leaving Cali behind just because my parents are coming to live in Seattle. We can come back if we ever go to LA for vacay, right?" I ask, assuring him. "We can go to the Pier like we did when exams were over." I eye him and add, "we can even stay in The Motel." 

His eyes meet mine and he grins deviously in remembrance. "That was fun." 

I snicker, remembering how nervous and embarrassed I was when we had sex for the second time, thinking he'd be weirded out by how into I was, and the fact that it was at a sketchy motel definitely added to the mood. "Yeah," I whisper, "it was fun."

Tonight we're not just sitting on the boardwalk talking. We helped my parents pack the rest of their things and decided to cool off by going for a swim and grabbed some dinner afterwards. Axel's still working on his falafel, which is surprising. It's our new favourite vegan food. He usually gulps two by the time I get through one. I don't know what's bothering him, if it's being here, or if it's leaving again tomorrow morning. 

I peck Axel's cheek before leaning over to finish off his falafel, popping a falafel ball into my mouth, smiling at him cheerily as I chew. 

He gives me a serious look but his eyes are joking. "Who said I was finished with that?" 

I chuckle and cuddle him, wiping my hands in my white sundress. "Sorry." I cuddle further into him, and end up shrugging the jacket over his shoulders onto mine to warm up from the cool rush of window brought in by the waves. "I'll just take this too," I murmur, bundling it around myself. 

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