Alone {𝕄𝕀ℕ𝕊𝕌ℕ𝔾}

Chapter Forty-Two

MINHO COUGHED SLIGHTLY, EYES WIDENING AS HE TURNED TO STARE AT JISUNG. THE YOUNGER seemed completely unbothered by his question, apart from the red staining his cheeks. "I, uh..." he knew what he wanted the answer to be, but the question was, did Jisung want the same thing?

He knew that they'd kissed, but that didn't necessarily mean anything. The truth was, as much as he wanted to believe that Jisung actually liked him, he knew he was extremely unlikeable. He swallowed thickly, mouth drying rapidly.

Did he lie? Or did he tell the truth? After a while, it's just not okay anymore. He exhaled, and pulled his bottom lip between his teeth. "We... I... I want us to be..." He felt the heat creep up the back of his neck now, and he looked away.

"To be us." He looked up, and cursed softly. "I mean, I want us to be... together, well," he spluttered, face heating. "I'm not good with words–" Jisung's lips split in a wide grin as he slid his hand on top of the other's.

"That's what I want too," he giggled, nearly cooing at the relieved smile present on the brunet's face the moment those words left his lips. He wasn't going to let anything ruin this moment of pure happiness he was experiencing. He could think of the consequences later, because he'd only just realized how unhappy he'd been, no matter how much he'd convinced himself otherwise, constantly living in fear of his parents' shadows.

He was finally beginning to truly feel the sun on his face again.

"So that means we're...?" Minho trailed off, eyes alit in happiness, but also in fear. Jisung wasted no time, nodding quickly. "Boyfriends? Yeah." It felt good to say that. His grin grew even wider, so much so that it almost hurt, but he didn't care.

Minho's smile grew to mirror the younger's, and he felt a sense of pride in that. He'd managed to make the brunet smile. Almost as if he was unable to help himself, he leaned forward and placed a quick peck on the elder's lips.

Minho blinked in shock; where had this sudden confidence come from? "I wasn't kidding when I said your smile was pretty." There it was; the classic blush that Jisung could never seem to fight off. Minho chuckled, and lied down on the grassy hill, staring up at the tree branches that shielded them.

Jisung followed his lead, instead opting to lie on his side so he could still see his boyfriend. He giggled slightly. Moments passed in a breezy haze, and, now in their silence, the thoughts he'd been ignoring finally managed to creep in.

He could hear his mother's voice as she screamed at his sister, he could still hear her cries as she begged them not to force her out of her home. His hand subconsciously clenched around Minho's, and the older male looked over at him in concern.

"Jisung? Are you alright?" He didn't reply for a few moments, causing the brunet to sit up, eyebrows now furrowed worriedly. The strawberry blonde was fighting off his tears, but he attempted to smile anyways.

"I'm f-fine." He knew he had to tell Minho about his parents, at least, because they couldn't be like normal couples. They couldn't kiss whenever they wanted, they couldn't act like a couple unless there was no one else around, and he needed to be aware of that. Because as much as he hated it, as much as he didn't want to be, Jisung was scared.

How would he survive if his parents found out and kicked him to the curb like they did his sister? He wouldn't make it on his own before he was eighteen. At least then, he could go to a university far away from home, or get a job without needing his parents' consent.

He was also scared that his dilemma would drive Minho away; who wanted to hide their relationship? Jisung certainly didn't, and it was his own fault that he'd have to, if the brunet decided to stick around. I don't want to ruin this.

Before he knew it, tears were slowly running down his cheeks, and Minho's eyes widened as he instinctively pulled the younger male in for a warm embrace. Jisung buried his face in his shoulder, biting down on his lip to prevent himself from downright wailing.

Funny how Minho was always there when he needed him the most. He didn't want to lose this, ever. "What's wrong?" The brunet asked softly, gently running his hand up and down the other's back in soothing motions.

Jisung sniffled, and looked up at his lover through teary eyes. "My parents... aren't.... they're... homophobic," he whispered, and Minho nodded, pressing a kiss to the top of his head. He'd figured as much over the course of the past few weeks. "So we can't..." his eyes welled up with tears once more, and the elder smiled and pecked his forehead.

"I know. It's okay." Jisung leaned into Minho, a soft, long sigh escaping him. "I'm so relieved," he mumbled. They stayed that way – for how long they didn't know – until Jisung's phone rang. He looked up from his place on Minho's shoulder, eyes widening as he sat upright and put the phone to his ear.

"Yes, hello?" He spoke, biting his lip as his mother's voice broke through the speaker. "Jisung, where are you?" she asked sternly, and he winced slightly, Minho's hand silently coming to grasp his own in a mute gesture of comfort.

"I'm with my friend, like I told you on text," he explained shakily, hoping she wouldn't be able to hear it through the phone. "Which friend?" she questioned again, and he clutched Minho's hand in return. "His name's Minho, I met him at school a few weeks ago." A few weeks. It had felt like so much longer to him.

His mother hummed in understanding. "Okay, it's time for you to come home now." He nodded, although she couldn't see it. "Bye, Mother–" Before he could even finish his sentence she hung up. He sighed, closing his eyes. Before they'd disowned his sister, they'd been a loving family. He missed those days, but he knew he could never get them back.

"I have to go." He forced a smile, because he truly didn't want to leave Minho's side. He just wanted to stay there, with him, staring up at the gradually setting sun, forever.

Minho nodded and stood up, dusting off his pants before holding out a hand for the younger. Their hands remained intertwined as they walked back down the hill, and out of the park. Nobody paid them a second thought, and that was perfect, because all that mattered was Minho's hand in his.

By the time they reached the intersection that led down to the two separate paths they needed to take, Jisung had realized that they didn't need to be like any other normal couple. We just have to be us.

A/N: I highkey sacrificed studying for my math quiz to write this, because #priorities. 

Thank you so much for 14k ;-;

Q: Are you a masochist reader (as in, you deliberately read angst because ya like emotional pain)? (courtesy of OCT0617 seriously thank you so much ily bro)

A: y e S ? 0.0 I'm not an easy cry-er, so it feels good when I can actually let it all out, s oooooo (and I just love angst, if you couldn't tell already oops)

Lots of love,

~Junnie

P.S: For some reason I'm super obsessed with Lady Gaga's Shallow now I listened to it as I wrote this XD