Chapter Fifty-Two

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IT TOOK A MOMENT FOR IT TO REGISTER, BUT WHEN IT DID, HE SPRANG AWAY FROM MINHO, whirling around in order to face a rather shocked Felix standing in the doorway. "F-Felix..." he mumbled, standing up while the brunet stayed frozen in his seat.

"What... what the hell?" Felix whispered, but his surprise quickly morphed into anger, his fists balling at his sides. "How could you?" he asked, tears welling in his eyes as he glared. The strawberry-blonde could feel the blood drain from his face, because he'd rarely ever seen Felix with so much as a semblance of tears in his eyes.

"I-I'm sorry..." he couldn't help the fact that his mind drifted over to the fact that his best-friend would reject him because he was gay. Just like his family. "I couldn't care less that you're gay, Jisung, but why... why him?" his tone harshened towards the end, and it took the strawberry-blonde a few moments to realize that he'd said a portion of his inner thoughts aloud.

His mouth dried, because what was he supposed to say that would possibly appease the raging boy? Jisung knew his best-friend; he knew he wasn't someone to get angry over nothing, but he couldn't quite figure out the roots of Felix's problem with the situation.

"I love him," he blurted, nearly wincing when Felix's eyes darkened ever-so-slightly. "I warned you, Jisung," he choked out. "But you still went ahead and," he took a deep breath. "did this." He was blinking rapidly, trying to hide the fact that he was near tears.

"I don't understand why you're so upset," Jisung felt as though his own anger was slowly seeping through, because why was he so against this? Didn't he want Jisung to be happy? "Because I don't want him to hurt you!" Felix cried, shoulders slowly sinking. "God knows how good he is at doing that," he whispered, and Minho winced, biting his lip as he averted his eyes.

Jisung sighed, attempting to calm his nerves as best as possible. "Let's go talk outside," he mumbled, pulling Felix by the wrist until they were standing on the house's front porch. This was a problem between him and Felix, and, quite frankly, Minho looked shaken up enough as it stood already.

He figured it would be best to keep him as far away from the cross-fire as possible.

His friend leaned against the side of the house, his head drooping slightly as he fought back his ever-present tears. "Felix, talk to me. You can't hate him just to hate him, you know." Felix's eyes hardened, and he scoffed.

"That's not the problem here," he growled pushing off the side of the house. "It kinda is," the strawberry-blonde male retorted, crossing his arms across his chest. "I'm getting kind of tired of this, Felix. I can date him and be your best-friend at the same time."

"You don't get it, do you!?" Felix exclaimed, his hands coming up to pull at his hair in frustration. "He's selfish. He thought he was alone when he had me; he didn't even care that he'd leave me behind," he hissed. "What do you mean?" Jisung questioned; the new information he was getting was somehow just making him even more confused than before.

His head was seriously starting to hurt.

"He... he tried to..." a lump formed in his throat. "kill himself last year," he whispered. He hadn't planned on revealing that to Jisung unless Minho had already, but he told himself it wasn't worth caring for. It frustrated him that he still cared when Minho didn't.

He'd already made that much clear that day, and by stealing his best-friend. Before, he knew Jisung would've taken his side on the matter, but now it was so painfully obvious that the blonde would choose Minho over Felix without even the slightest hesitation; and it hurt.

"Last year?" When Felix nodded at his confirmation, he immediately saw the disappointment shrouding the strawberry-blonde's eyes. "So... you really lied," he mused, but his tone didn't hold a single ounce of humour to it.

Felix's eyes widened, and he cast them to the side. Jisung scoffed indignantly, feeling tears come to his own eyes now. He knew it wasn't wise to leave the conversation where it was, but now it was his turn to feel hurt.

"This isn't who I thought I befriended," he finalized, turning on his heels and hurrying away from the slightly younger boy. "J-Jisung! Wait!" But he was already gone. Felix stood there, almost dumbly, for several moments afterwards, and when he managed to drag himself back into his home, all he wanted was to be left alone.

He felt as though Jisung would never forgive him. And it's all because of him. "Felix...?" Minho called out quietly, and the boy looked up with angry eyes. "Don't talk to me, I... I hate you," he hissed before quickly running up the stairs, leaving Minho all on his lonesome.

He stood there for several moments, before his eyes welled with tears. He'd kept hope alive that maybe, just maybe, Felix would one day forgive him, but that hope... was completely extinguished. 

A/N: Hmmm

Q: How's it going?

A: So earlier today I actually texted my crush 'cause YOLO and we had this really nice conversation for about an hour or so... and then she stopped answering me, and I'm kinda wondering if I said something or if I came off too strong or smth, or maybe I'm overthinking it and she's just busy, but if I can fangirl a little bit, she's so... awesome, like, she plays along to my stupid jokes and she said she loves memes too, and she's just so nice like she literally actively participated in a conversation with a complete stranger (AKA me) and I'm-- I'm just whipped, man ;-;

Probably setting myself up for disappointment, but whipped.

Lots of love,

~Junnie

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