Reborn

Chapter 16

After Sean's mother moved, everything changed. The house transformed into a home. There was no more tension in the air. Sean became more loving and care free. He even started sharing the chores with me. At this point we didn't have a helper anymore because money was so tight but slowly we were trying to make it work.

Sean decided that he wanted to learn to cook, so I printed out an indian cook book for him so that he could learn. Even though I loved cooking, it would help a lot. So, Sean started experimenting in the kitchen and I must say, he took me by surprise. Even though Darius and I got to a point sometimes where we were tired of indian food. I really enjoyed having the time off somedays. Sean worked shifts so he would work two days, two nights and get four days off.

It got to a point where I only cooked when he worked days and on weekends. It gave me time to concentrate on all the other household chores.

This change in our living environment was doing all of us the world of good. There was laughter in our home for the first time. Now, don't get me wrong. I felt terrible that Sean's mother was not living with us anymore especially since I had no contact with my own family. But it wasn't a healthy living environment seeing that Seans mother and I could never see eye to eye. Sometimes I wondered if Sean resented me and blamed for his mother moving out.

And I asked him enough times because I prefer being verbal and getting everything out in the open. And he always reassured me that he didn't. That turned out to be shortlived though.

The very next time his mother came to stay, some problem or the other came up. It was mostly a feeling that I wasn't welcomed in my own home.

Now, I get that maybe she wants to take care of her son and grandson but she did a lot of things that upset me. Everything went back to how it was when she used to live with us. I felt that it was my home and since she is a visitor in my home, as the lady of the house I should be consulted on all decision making. But this wasn't the case. She felt that it was her sons house and she could do as she pleases. This started to become frustrating. I felt like an outsider, I was made to feel as though I didn't belong.

Its such a difficult feeling to explain but I'm going to try. I felt like a guest in my own home. It was as though I was standing on the outskirts and watching them. I would just go home, shower, eat and go to bed. There wasn't any interaction between us when his mother was around. The atmosphere would just change. I tried my best, but whenever she came, something would just change.

Like she wouldn't even ask me if she could cook, she would just do it. I enjoyed cooking for my family and you are the guest in my home so if I need you to do something, I would ask. But no, she would just take over. Also, we developed a pattern. The only times we would eat indian food was when Sean cooked and not all the time either and on weekends. During the course of the week, we had grown used to having pastas and roasts...all simple yet good food. Now, Seans mother would visit and cook curries everyday which was something Darius and I couldn't handle. I remember a day not too long ago when Darius got a point that he actually refused to have supper. He wanted to have biscuits or toast and tea.

Now, maybe I sound like a nag or a controlling bitch but you have no idea until you are in that situation. Like one day, when we had had enough of curries and Darius begged me to make something for supper. Sean had gone to work that morning so there was no way of his mother manipulating anything. I took some chicken out of the freezer to make a simple pot roast cause at that point all we wanted was some plain simple food.

I was so looking forward to going home and making good old fashioned pot roast. Now, Darius always called me as soon as he got home from school. Firstly, so that I would know he's safe at home. Secondly to ask me whats there for him to eat. He would shower and eat and then call me back for a nice chat. So, that day Darius calls me as usual. But this time he asked me a question I didn't want to hear and one I hadn't expected at all.