Casual Affair [Ryden]

Chapter 3

Brendon

I slowly open my eyes and frown. It's still early in the morning. I never wake up so early... Then I hear 'Let's kill tonight' coming out of my mobile phone and I frown. Who is calling me? I take the phone and walk out of the bedroom so that Sarah won't wake up. I pick up the phone.

"Hi is this Brendon Urie?"

"Y-yes? Who are you?"

"Great. Hey Brendon. I'm Danielle, Ryan's therapist. And actually I was wondering if you'd like to meet him. He misses you a lot and wants to explain why he did what he did. Is that okay for you?"

I freeze. This can't be true. Ryan does not want to see me after four years. This must be some kind of joke... Whoever it is, I'm going to kill her. Ryan left me. Ryan is not coming back to me... He never will...

"You're lying." I choke out. I sit down on the couch and bite my lips.

"I know it's hard to believe. But Ryan really wants to see you again. Actually he's here right next to me. Ryan? Are you okay with talking to Brendon?" I hear her ask. My eyes start to water. It's not Ryan. It's not Ryan...

"H-hi... Brendon." I hear someone whisper. You can barely hear what he is saying. But I immediately recognize his voice. Ryan. George Ryan Ross. I start to cry and hold my phone tighter.

"H-hi Ry...Ryan." I stutter and hug myself with my free arm.

"I... I... can I meet you?"

"Why now? After four years Ryan... I don't understand!" I choke out and start to cry louder.

"I... that's why I want to meet you. I want to explain... I want to tell you what happened to me when I was younger... Because that'll explain why I was too afraid to continue Panic!." Ryan says quietly. I frown. When he was younger? But... So he didn't tell me everything... Just when I want to ask him about it, I hear that Ryan also starts to cry.

"I-I'm so sorry I didn't tell you Bren... I was so scared you'd hate me... I'm... I'm still so fucking terrified..." he cries out. Every sob, every cry, it feels like someone stabs me. That's the moment I decide that I will not let him down.

"Ryan? Should I come to your place?" I ask him softly. I can hear his sigh of relief and I smile a little.

"Yeah... yeah that's okay for me... But Danielle will also be there. When I freak out... well then she can calm me down." Ryan says, and I can hear the fear in his voice. Ryan has always been afraid of rejection, but I didn't know it was this big...

He tells me his adress and we agree that I'll be there in three hours. We say goodbye and I put down the phone. I stare at the ceiling and bite my lips. It's real. I'm really going to meet Ryan again. My Ryan...

Oh wait. I still have to tell Sarah...