Who Do You Love || L.H

Thirteen

Ally's pov

It has been almost three weeks since I've called Luke, and he's been blowing up my phone ever since. It's taking every muscle in me to not answer him. I know answering him would be bad for both of us. I should've never called him in the first place.

I have about five voicemails and twenty text messages all from Luke. I never looked at them because I know it would lead to me giving in and answering him. There's times where I want to open the voicemails and just hear him talk. I really miss his voice. I miss laying on his chest and hearing him talk about his day. There's so many things that I miss about him.

Sierra is the luckiest girl ever. I can't help but feel jealous. I could've had everything that she has. I could've had Luke, I could've had happiness, but all of that went out the door when I did what I did. I've never been this jealous over someone. It all started when I saw them at the restaurant. They looked so happy together. Luke couldn't keep his eyes off of her. I mean, she's fucking gorgeous, how could he not stare at her. Apart of me was very irritated by that. I wanted it to be me. I wanted to be the girl that Luke couldn't keep his eyes off. I want to be the girl that Luke loves. I want to be Sierra.

This crazy jealousy that I have is slowly eating me alive. I just want to be with him, but I know that it's bad for the both of us. It would just bring back a bunch of bad memories. Plus, he's already very happy with Sierra. She's way better than me. She wouldn't hurt Luke like I did.

This isn't healthy at all. I've been thinking about being with him for two years. I've tried so hard to get over him, but it hasn't worked. I've passed so many dating opportunities because I can't get over Luke. He's always been on my mind, no matter how many times I try to get him off of it. I thought I was getting better about a month ago, but that all changed when I saw him. Ever since then, the obsession came back. I just want to touch him. I want him. I crave him.

Getting over him is something I can't do. I've tried for two years, but it's obviously not working. People always say that if you want something, you should go and get it. I want Luke, so I'm going to get him, even if it means breaking up him and Sierra. I know that that's a bad idea, but I can't help it. I want him so bad, and I won't get over this craving until I get him. I have to have him.

I went through all the voicemails and text messages that Luke sent me. I replayed the voicemails over and over, just listening to his voice. He sounded so desperate. He was dying to know what I was going to say the night I called him. I sat on my bed and thought everything through. What I'm about to do is either going to go good or bad.

I picked up my phone and called him. The phone rang for awhile before going to his voice message. I was a little devastated that he didn't answer. I would've thought that he was waiting by his phone just to see if I would answer. The voice message finally ended and the beep went off, indicating that it's time for me to leave my message.

"Hey, Luke. It's Ally. I'm sorry for not answering you for two weeks. I thought that that was the good thing to do, but that just made things worse. Well, here's what I wanted to tell you. I haven't been able to get you off my mind. You've been on my mind for the past two years. I thought that I was over you, but I'm not. That really came to my attention when I saw you at the restaurant. I know I don't have much time before it cuts me off, but I just want you to know that I miss you. I miss your smile, I miss your laugh, I miss your tou...." The beep cut me off before I could finish.

I sat on my bed, staring at my phone. This could end in two different ways. I could somehow win Luke over with the voice message, or I don't win him over. I really hope I win him over. I need to win him over.