Behind My Eyes

The Deepest Blue

Sometimes I wonder if God made the sky just for me.
Sometimes I forget that it isn't mine, that it doesn't belong to me.
When I walk home, the breeze surrounds me and I feel him.
I always talk to myself in those moments.
Knowing he hears me, sees me, knows me... I talk to myself frequently.
I forget when my babeling starts and when my prayers end.
I talk to myself under that sky, and I forget who my mumbling was really meant for.
I let the breeze embrace me, loving the way he raps his love around me... Sometimes cold... Sometimes warm.
And when I get to my house I hesitate.
Each and every time, I hesitate.
Most days I go inside and finish a day's worth of living, wondering... Am I really living?
But on those rare, special occasions I allow myself to sit outside.
I watch the cars pass, I watch the buildings,I watch the bits and peices of nature left around like the broken alcohol bottols on the side walk.
But I can never take me eyes off the sky for too long, all my days reflected in it.
I sat there and saw the deepest blues I have ever seen in my life.
The sky likes to fade into itself and re appear another.
Black, than dark blue than a deeper lighter blue than dark again.
The half Moon shining against it along with no stars.
A moon that always seemed full.
But if I would have stared too long at that sky, it would have captured me as it's own.
Taking my irises to reflect it's image, dilating my pupils with lust for a love with in it that I've never known.
I've always seen it as mine.