.touch.

1

I woke up the same way I always do, with a pounding heart and sweat drenching my forehead and my chest. I sighed loudly trying to get my breathing under control. Three months. This has been happening to me for the past three months and I still couldn’t figure out what it meant. ‘Touch Me’ the girl had said but every time I tried I would wake up, what was this dream trying to tell me? Was it to warn me about something? Was I not meant to help her?

I shook the questions from my mind and heading to the bathroom, turning on the light as I looked in the mirror, my dark skin was contrasting with my now blue eyes, which meant I was close to changing again I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, I pictured myself in my first form: The dark brown and honey mix wolf with blue eyes and slowly pushed it down in my imagination hiding it away from the outside world and myself, when I opened my eyes again I looked completely human.

But I wasn’t human. I was a wolf.

I washed my face and my chest in cold water trying to relax. I pull my long brown and blonde hair up into a bun making sure none of it rested on my neck and tried to relax but the dream had me going again, there was no way I was getting back to sleep. I went back to my bed and sat down heavily.

Even after all these nights I couldn’t figure out what the dream meant, all dreams mean something. I just couldn’t figure this one out. I couldn’t help thinking it was the stress of becoming Alpha on my birthday five months ago, but if it was why would they start two months after and not right away, or even before hand?

I got up from my bed sighing and made my way over to the punching bag I had installed earlier this year to help deal with my aggression, giving it a soft punch. I didn’t feel like putting on my protection gear and a little bit of me actually wanted to feel the pain. So I started soft, at first not wanting to wake my father and the rest of my pack that spent the night, we all strived off of physical contact but after my nightmares  began I started keeping to myself even when my blood and body was yelling at me to get closer to my sleeping pack downstairs.

Punch

What the hell did this all mean? What was the warning? My dreams were always warnings.

Punch

I kept working at the punching bag, forcing out all of my aggression, trying to tire myself out. I could feel the pain for only seconds before it actually healed just waiting for a new mark. I growled and punched at the bag again, punching harder.

I heard the soft knock at my door, and stopped immediately before even sniffing at the air or listening to heartbeat I could tell it was Allyson at the door. I quickly walked over to my door and opened it slowly, Ally smiled at me looking up at me with her dark eyes and small smile. She was in small shorts and a T-shirt picking at her nails a little and she smiled up at me.

“Um, can I come in please?” She asks not looking me in the eye. I knew what she was doing, Allyson may have been older than me but I was higher in ranks, she didn’t want to show disrespect, but I didn’t want my pack to fear me. I wanted them to see me as equal, or at least equal enough. So I put my hand under her chin so the small girl would actually look in my eye.

“Of course you can Ally,” I said softly and she looked up at me with grateful eyes.  We walked back to my bed and I sit the smaller girl on my lap.

“Ally what’s wrong?” I asked her keeping my voice monotone trying not to let any of my emotions wash off on her.

“Nothing,” She says “I just… wanted to be near you,” She places her head against my neck and nuzzles me, I smile softly. I know I’ve been harsh to my pack after those first two months and I know I’ve changed since the dreams began but I didn’t know how to stop it, I didn’t have control. I didn’t know how to start or how to stop.

“I know I’ve been tough… I’m sorry,”

“Don’t apologize alpha, you’re doing the best you can.”

Ally and I have been close since the day I was born, we all knew I was alpha elect, meant to be alpha once I’ve come of age. She was the one who was supposed to protect me until I came into myself and learned control and could take care of myself, but I ended up taking care of her. I always had a soft spot for Ally, I touched her more and I kept her close she was my second and I adored her. A lot of the older pack members thought that we would actually be mates one day, but Ally and I knew that wasn’t the case even though sometimes we wished it so.

I sighed against her and held her close against my waist “I’m trying,” Ally was the only one who knew about my dreams and she barely knew anything about them. She knew I had trouble sleeping but she didn’t know the reason besides nightmares.

“Don’t worry,” Ally tells me “Tomorrow’s a new day.”