Sometimes

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Sometimes I wish I should've driven the blade in deeper m,
So deep that I slice off my veins.
But, a little voice in my would ask,
"What good would that do?"
The little voice was always right.
Nothing good would come out if it.
Because, I would be hurting the people who love and care about me,
More importantly, the one who created my entire being.
Even though I threw the blade away,
Even though I have recovered from searching for means of physical pain,
I cannot help but sometimes think about closing my eyes and never waking up.
Just sometimes. Not as often as I used to.
Sometimes.

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