The secret within

43. Don't do this

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April 8, 2017.
1:09pm.

• • •

Sitting outside Alani's home, high and drunk Cedrick prepared himself for today. The day his baby girl would have been two years old- this day last year Alani was in a coma and couldn't celebrate with Cedrick and even with the anger and hurt he felt towards her right now he would never rob her of going to to the grave and just sit with their babygirl. He was hurt with some shit she did and said, but they were both parents first.

Checking his phone he let yet another sigh escape his lips, seeing Alondra still hadn't texted him back. After last night he think he'd made the worst decision in his life regarding his woman.

"Y'all can't be serious?" Alondra frowned as her hands shook lightly from the questions and the fact they wanted her to choose between the two. The man she loved with her whole heart and shared a kid with, or her sister she always only had no matter their differences. "I cannot believe y'all are acting like this." She teared up.

Feeling Aniyla start to wake up Cedrick looked down at her with a smile on his face. When her eyes popped open she immediately let out a small squeal and toothless grin. "I missed you too." He laughed and kissed her cheek making her giggle and kick her feet because she'd missed him that much.

"You're right." Cedrick looked at Alondra. "I'd never make you choose, because I'm a man and you know I only want what' makes you happy, I know how important both of us are to you and I'd never put you in that situation-- I got caught up because I don't want to lose you but I also know you sister is more important than what we share." He sighed. "Maybe we should just co-parent it's clear you can't have us both, and I rather you have the only family you got left. I love you that much." He smiled a little, although his heart was breaking.

Alondra jumped up. "What are you saying? I'm sure Alani and I can work through this." She teared up. "Why can't I never be the one that's happy? Why do I always have to make decisions? Hm?" She went off. "Alani are you seriously gone make me choose?" She looked at her.

"I'm sorry Alondra. I just can't watch you two together. Like I know you couldn't with me if the shoe was on the other foot." She played with her fingers.

"Wow." Alondra scoffed. "If it made you happy then you know I would of sucked that shît up for you." Alondra stomped her foot as if she was a child.

"It's fine" Cedrick spoke. "Family first." He went to her and wiped her tears, kissing her lips.

Alani sat and watched her sister break down while Cedrick left, and when she didn't go after him she knew she had chose her.

Taking the last hit from his blunt he put it out, and proceeded to make his way towards the house. Using the spare key to let himself in, he waited patiently as the new nurse helped Alani into her chair. "Oh she could walk now?" He was took back a little bit.

"Alondra thought it was time to get me out the chair, I'm not walking but with the help I could move my feet and legs a little." Alani responded and he nodded, pulling out his phone and taking a seat.

"Proud of you." He mumbled and sent Alondra yet another text simply saying: 'Tell my daughter I love her and I'll be to get her later.' He frowned at the instant reply for that instead of the twenty other times he texted her.

Everything💍: She loves you more, and can't wait to spend the week with you.

-I love you, you good?

Everything💍: I don't know. How about you choose for me, you know so much. Am I good? Big ass decision maker, never knew a relationship worked with just one person. Fuck you, leave me alone. Today ain't the day, I have a niece birthday to celebrate, hope you're holding up, genuinely speaking.

"I'm ready." Alani waved in his face. "If this is going to be awkward then I'll just have Alondra come take me." She sighed. "Don't see the big deal anyway."

"Bitc--" He bit his lip. "I'm not doing this on my daughters day, just shut the fuck up." He let the nurse wheel her out and she'd let him take the van designed for patients in wheelchairs, and waited for her to be fully in before backing out.

The ride was quiet, Cedrick didn't feel like talking and Alani knew if she'd said anything it'll most likely come out wrong because of how bitter she was, but the more she sat and let it eat at her it made her blood boil. This would be her first time alone with him since she'd known they were married. She wanted answers, and while today wasn't the day to get them she would try anyway, to ease her mind and conscious. She was hurt she could barely remember Alexis, and she just wanted Cedrick to tell her more about her, or what happened to her.

"Could you tell me more about Alexis?" She broke the silence, watching how his hand gripped the steering wheel at the sound of her name. "I remember some things, just not what happened to her."

"She was premature of course, couldn't breathe or anything on her own and the one time she showed signs of breathing by herself." He choked up. "The nurse told us she could be held and of course we were too happy to even ask if it was safe--- you held her first and she was fine." He smiled a little. "Then I held her, and she opened her eyes for me, I'll never forget that little smile." He chuckled. "You were so mad, but no later than two hours later she'd passed away in my arms." He wiped his face quickly pulling into the graveyard.

Alani smiled and grabbed his hand seeing how emotional he had became. "She would of loved you, don't blame yourself." She looked up at him and he looked at her for the first time in a long time. "I know I've made mistakes, and some unforgivable but I am truly apologizing to you and when you're ready, I want to talk to you and really give you closure." She looked him directly in his eyes.

Cedrick mouth went to say something but he closed it back and slowly removed his hand away from hers and broke eye contact. "I truly apologize too, I never meant to hurt you but I'm willing to talk. Just not today." He got out and let out a shaky breath, going to get her out.

"I love you Cedrick" Alani teared up. "My heart hurts, and it hurts bad. I know I wasn't the best wife but I could be, we're not divorced yet. I know you still love me." She finally blurted it out. "Give me another chance to get it right this time-- you were the best thing to happen to me, I'm so sorry." She cried.

"Don't do this Alani." He bent down to unstrap her to get her out, and was caught off guard when she crashed her lips onto his.