my favorite part • chris evans (bwwm)

• nineteen •

"Why am I here?" Phoenix asked suspiciously as she stared across at Mackie. He had asked her to meet in his trailer when she had a quick break but didn't tell her why.

Unlike in Phoenix's last work location, where she had a lot of time to speak to Tom and Pratt, she was being worked to death since there were more than double the amount of cast members in the 'Wakanda group.' She had been back with them for almost a week and barely got the chance to look at, let alone speak to anyone in the cast. Because crew members were dropping like flies, the Russo's were forced to move her back to a production assistant type role. They tried not to give her too many errands to run so she could still observe their directing style but she was still busy running around for the majority of her days there.

"What are your intentions with my sweet boy, Christopher?"

"What are your sweet boy Christopher's intentions with me?" Phoenix reversed.

"Touché Phoenix. Touché."

"I'm a little busy so if you don't mind, I-"

"You know, I do like you Phoenix but I don't know you that well." Mackie cut her off. "However, I do know Chris and I'm not going to lie, your relationship concerns me."

Phoenix rolled her eyes. "No disrespect, but I genuinely don't care."

"That's fair." He nodded. "I'm not here to tell you how to live your life but I do look at you as that of a younger relative. Can I just offer you some advice?"

"Go for it."

"Think about what you want out of this relationship. Not just this relationship but every relationship, really." He began. "You are so young, so full of life. Don't ever feel like you're in a rush to make big life decisions. Don't compromise your dream, your future for ANYONE. Not a friend, not a boyfriend, and not even your mama."

Phoenix nodded. She wasn't sure where he was going with the conversation but she did appreciate his advice. As much as he liked to tease her, she did get the feeling that Mackie cared for her.

"I can't pretend to know what yours and Chris's relationship is like nor would I want to. I just want you to think about what would happen if you were to, say, fall in love. Would you be willing to compromise on certain things? Moving to Boston, getting married, having kids..." Mackie went on. "I'm not saying end your relationship but I do want you to think about YOUR future and YOUR career goals. Think about where you see this going because Chris is all in. He falls fast and loves HARD. If at any point you don't see a real future with him or decide you don't want to make those compromises, please let him go."

"Okay."

"This is the last time I'm going to talk to you about this." He let her know. "I'm proud of what you've done, getting your education and working so hard to get out here. I'm not trying to influence you one way or the other, I just want you to think."

Phoenix left Mackie's trailer with a million thoughts in her mind. As much as she hated to admit it, he was absolutely right. She knew from the beginning Chris was ready for marriage and kids while he, and everyone else, knew Phoenix was not. She was not willing to sacrifice all of her hard work to be with a man, no matter how perfect he was.

She began thinking about the things she would possibly sacrifice if things went well with her and Chris. Moving to Boston was out of the cards. It didn't have to be Los Angeles, but it one thing she'd never do is live in Massachusetts. As for marriage, she decided she would consider it with her choice being dependent on a long engagement of at least a year and a half. Having kids any time within the next 5-7 years was a flat no. Not something she would compromise on, at all.

Phoenix knew a conversation needed to be had between she and Chris but why so early? Sure they were going on dates and hanging out consistently but he wasn't her boyfriend. She didn't see a point of discussing marriage and kids until she knew for sure Chris would be an integral part in her future.

"Hey sweetie!" Elizabeth greeted after Phoenix knocked on her trailer door. "What's up?"

"Everybody keeps reminding me that Chris wants to get married and have children." She spoke right away. "I don't want those things... does that mean we're wasting our time?"

Elizabeth opened the door wider so Phoenix could enter. She obliged and took a seat on a bench that was attached to the table. "Is marriage something you see in the cards at all in the future?"

"Eventually, yes."

"And having children?"

"I don't know." Phoenix shrugged.

"I don't think you're wasting your time. Some people come into your life and open your eyes to new things, new experiences, new possibilities." Elizabeth spoke. "Chris is that kind of man, the kind that makes you want to work that much harder and be that much better. Even if it doesn't work out in the end, I truly think it'd be an amazing growth opportunity. He wouldn't be one of those exes that you had wish you'd never met."

"That sounds about right."

"Listen, when I was 22 I wasn't thinking about getting married. But honestly Phoenix, you don't really know how much you're willing to give until you meet the right person." She continued. "In one relationship, the thought of having kids with your partner might just disgust you and you blame it on the fact that you just don't want kids. But the truth of the matter is that you just might not want kids with that person. In another relationship, you might wonder what it'd be like to bring a piece of you both into the world and completely change your mind. Or you just might decided you truly don't want kids. The point I'm trying to make it that you won't know unless you push those boundaries and take a leap of faith."

"Not too long ago, my sister asked who I was bringing to her wedding and I basically thought anybody but Chris." Phoenix admitted. "But now, as of a couple days ago, I wouldn't want to bring anybody else."

"See, there you go!" She encouraged. "You're starting to figure out how you feel about Chris."

"Sometimes I just look at him and think about how lucky I am to have someone so amazing in my life. He is so vulnerable and sweet, it makes me wanna cry sometimes." Phoenix smiled at the thought of him. "He's always going out of his way to show me how much he cares by doing genuinely kind things without expecting anything in return. Sometimes I wonder what it'd be like to just be with him... forever. What it'd be like to go to sleep with him every night and wake up with him by my side every morning. I can't imagine anybody else treating me so lovingly, so delicately. He's just... he just makes me very happy to even be alive."

"Have you ever been in love before Phoenix?"

"No."

"Well, get ready because it looks like you're in the fast track now." Elizabeth smiled. "You're falling in love with Chris Evans."

"I am not." Phoenix argued. "Am I?"

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