Here is a request made by @That-One-Hot-Mess. UwU 💖 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"Fine! Fuck you too, Jake!" I yelled, turning and stomping up the stairs.
"I wish I never would have asked your pathetic self out!" Jake yelled back at me as I ran up the stairs and slammed the door of small closet behind me. Yeah, we had a room but we shared it. Sometimes I just want to be by myself, and when that happened I lock myself in our blanket closet. I had a whole hideout here- I had blankets, pillows, a laptop, an automatic cooler, headphones, stuffed animals, and a razor blade I had managed to pry off of a pencil sharpener.
As if almost by instinct, the second I shut the door behind me tears began to run down my cheeks. I fell onto my knees onto the ground and grabbed a blanket with my shaky hands. I lied down on my side on the floor and covered up, cuddling the extra blanket against my shoulder as I continued to sob. Though, my reasonings are pretty understandable.
Wouldn't you be crying if your drunk boyfriend came home and dragged you out of bed at two in the morning, just to scream at you about basically every single things you've ever done wrong to him and then get told that he never loved you and he wished he never even asked you out, despite the fact that you love that guy with all your heart and soul?! Yeah, that's what I thought...
The more I thought about the topic, the more I wanted to just die! People give off a lot of information when they're drunk. What if he meant all of the shit he said?! What if he doesn't love me?! What if he wants to break up?! What if he loves somebody else?!
Suddenly, those tears I had flowing down my face suddenly got a whole lot more noticeable...
I glanced up at the razor- Well, what I could see through my watery eyes, anyways. With one quick more, I reached over and grabbed the blade, pulling my hand holding the killer object to my chest. You'd think that if something so dramatic happened to you, then you would eventually just feel... nothing? Numbness? But no! There's no way that the universe would be so kind as to let you feel numb when all you can feel is an overwhelming amount of pain and suffering! The more it happens, the more you cry. The more you cut. And eventually, the more you want to die because you want to leave the person hurting you so badly, but you just can't because you love him so much, despite how much of a dick he is!
I wiped the stray tears off my cheeks, but it didn't help my vision much. I brought my shaky hand up to my other arm, resting the cold metal piece to my already cut and scared wrist. I bit my lip and took in a deep breath as I slowly dragged the sharp piece downwards, crying even harder- not from the pain, but from my own mind and thoughts.
Why the fuck am I like this?! Why do I have to get lost in my thoughts- and not the good ones. Only the ones that kill me mentally, and make me cut my wrists open physically!
After about five minutes of thinking, I looked down at my arm. Six long cuts, blood slowly gushing out of the wounds. I hadn't noticed much when I had stopped crying and the tears stained my cheeks damp, letting out a shaky sigh and setting the blood-stained razor back on top of the cooler.
With my blurred vision I lied down on the pallet I had made, sniffling and using my unhurt hand to clench my bleeding arm.
No longer than ten minutes of silence and aggonising thoughts was I interupted by a soft knock on the door.
"Albert..." Jake's quiet voice called. I hesitantly looked at the door and rolled my eyes.
"Go a-away." I said with a deep growl. Though he quite obviously ignored me when I heard the door open.
"Baby, p-please come back to bed." He mumbled, the sound of something elastic filling the small closet and the older male gently taking my arm. I looked up and watched as he wrapped cool gauze around my blood-stained wrists.
"No. I want you to leave m-me alone. You know, it really hurts my feelings that you do this! That you go and say a bunch of hurtful shit to me and then make me feel like the badguy! I swear to god, if I didn't love you I would have left months ago and now I feel like shit for loving you!" I said, quickly using my free arm to wipe the new tears threatening my eyes away.
Jake gave off a shaky sigh. "I really am sorry, darling. I love you... I am such a dick. But can we please talk about this in the morning when we're both thinking strait...?" He mumbled, standing up before picking me up bridal style. I sighed and hid my face in my hands, staying quiet.
Jake carried me to our room and set me down on my side of the bed before I felt him lay down beside me and wrap an arm around me, pulling my back to his chest after he covered me up.
"I love you, Jakey..." I quietly mumbled, a deadpan look on my face as I stared out of the dark window on the other side of the room, watching as the tree branches danced in the wind and under the moon light.
If only I was as free as the moon...
I thought. Though I knew that, even if I had the opportunity to leave, I wouldn't take it. I would stay right here with Jake. Just like the universe wants me to...
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Hey, everybody!! I am sorry to all the people I told I would publish a chapter yesterday, I've actually been really busy with my youtube channel!! I know that you guys won't care but I really would appreciate it if you guys checked out some of my videos and subbed!! 💖 My goal is 1K by the end of the year. And it would be very much loved if you guys helped my reach that goal!! I am not sure if this will help or not, but...
Here is the link: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCx6n6reDv1rd-QxPgR4d91A
And here is a picture of my channel
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I really do hope y'all sub to me and I cannot wait to see you all in the next chapter!! 💖💖
