chapter nine - solicitude

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"nice to meet you Cain," you said while awkwardly thinking about something to talk about. conversations have never been your strength. but before you could say anything, he turned to you. "would you like to go outside together? we could do some stuff," he said.
"i'm not allowed to go outside..." your heart ached. why wouldn't they let you outside? it didn't make sense to you. "ah, i see. well, we could stay here if you want?"
"i don't think-" you couldn't finish you sentence. someone entered the room and immediately looked at you. not just 'someone'. it was him. leslie. your heart immediately started to beat faster. you were sure that everyone was able to hear it. his gaze went to the person next to you. you couldn't exactly say what it was, but something was different. leslie's expression changed to something you weren't used to. he turned around and left the room. you were confused. you stood up and wanted to go after him, but a hand grabbed you and turned you around. "where are you going (y/n)?" Cain asked with a worried expression on his face. "i'm not feeling too well... please let go of me," you said. he immediately let go of your hand. "should i call a nurse? or bring you back to your room?" he looked sincere.
"no, thank you. i'll see you around," you said and hurried out of the room. you looked around but couldn't find leslie anywhere.
where did he go? and why did he leave so fast?
you decided to head towards the dining room. you didn't know why he would be in there, especially at this time, but you decided to look there nonetheless. mostly because you didn't know this place very well and didn't know where else to search. you reached the dining room and entered it. but as expected, leslie wasn't in here.
maybe he just doesn't feel well and needs some time alone...
you tried to convince yourself that he was fine, what didn't really work. you went back to your room, unsure if it was the right thing to do.

leslie was in his room, pacing restlessly up and down. he couldn't understand his feelings and it scared him. what was happening to him? he started to frantically pick at the skin around his eyes. he always does this when he's stressed or scared. the doctors and nurses often tried to help him stop picking at his skin, but to no avail.
he hurried to the corner of his room and crouched down. his hands were around his legs and he started rocking back and forth.

a few hours passed and you were still worried about leslie. you spent the whole day in your room thinking about what happened. you had only seen him a few times and he was very wary about everything, so you couldn't see through him. but that's what made him so interesting. you couldn't help but think about him all the time. why is he in here? what happened to him? you felt bad for him and you were mad at yourself for giving up on finding him. what if something happened? it was almost time for dinner so you rushed out of your room and went to the dining room.
please let him be there...

you entered the dining room and looked around. it didn't take you long to find the white barnet. leslie sat alone at a table, his nurse watching over him. you slowly walked over to him when you spotted the red bloody parts under his eyes. your heart ached but you continued to approach him. he just sat there and stared at his food, his nurse was at a loss as to what to do. when she looked up and saw you, she started to smile. suddenly leslie tilted his head to the side and looked up. his expression changed when he saw you, but you couldn't tell what he was thinking.
"hello leslie," you said with a smile. you couldn't explain why you were so happy to see him. "is it okay if i eat my dinner here?"
he stared at you for a few seconds until he nodded. you quickly got your food and sat down in front of him. he was still staring at you, but you had gotten used to it. you chuckled because his mouth was slightly open. he looked like he didn't know what to say. you started to eat and thought about whether or not to talk about what happened. you didn't want to make him mad or feel bad.
"leslie... about what happened earlier when you ran out of the group room... i'm really sorry if i did something that hurt you. i never meant to do that, i would never hurt you leslie." you looked down. why is it that you hurt everyone that comes close or means something to you. why do you always hurt the people you love the most?
"(y-y/n)..."
you looked up and realised that your hand was about to break your cup. you didn't even realise that you were holding it in the first place. you quickly placed it on the table and put your hands in your lap.
"(y/n) did n-nothing wrong."
you stared at leslie in disbelief. suddenly he stood up and rushed out of the room.
"leslie? leslie, wait!" you called after him and stood up. but leslie's nurse stopped you before you had the chance to run after him.
"miss (l/n), please wait. i'm sure he will come back."
"what? but why would you think that?" you asked her, still trying to get past her.
"i know leslie, he didn't seem scared or nervous, so there's no reason for him to run away," his nurse said, trying to reassure you.
"but-" you were about to say something, until you spotted someone behind her.

you are my home - leslie withers x readerWhere stories live. Discover now