Watch The Throne (Urban)

Chapter Thirty One [Emotions]

Before you read- Do me a favor and go check out my new book "Escape From Chiraq" if you like books about gang life and teen pregnancy go check that out. I'll be mainly focusing on that book and this one from now on :)

C A L V I N

"So what are you gonna do" I asked my father as we walked beside each other and he remained deep in thought. He'd just gotten home and he said he wanted to talk to me about some stuff so we were on the same page but knowing him that could mean anything.

"About what went down with your mother, you think that was right?" He asked and I shrugged my shoulders as he stopped walking and grabbed my arm so I wouldn't continue to walk away. I turned to face him but continued to look down at my feet not wanting to say anything.

"When I say something to you I expect an answer Cal, don't make me put my hands on you" He said calmly as he sat down on a bench and I took a seat next to him shaking my head.

"No it wasn't right and I shouldn't of done that I was just really upset at the time" I shrugged and he patted his pockets before pulling out a blunt and a lighter. I watched as he lit it and got comfortable sitting his arm on the back of the bench as he look me over.

"I didn't comit to her because I don't know how, I'm not husband or boyfriend material and I don't see the point of comiting to a female if your still gonna do her wrong" He shrugged and I nodded remaing quiet not knowing if now was the time to bring up how I felt about a lot of shit.

"Me and Unc were talking awhile back and I don't know if nows a good time to bring it up" I said glancing over at him as he looked at the dark sky blowing smoke into the air nodding his head.

"Go ahead, no need to keep shit bottled up" He said turning to look at me and I couldn't bring myself to look him in the eye in fear I might tear up as I talked and I didn't need him laughing or not taking me serious because of him acting like I wasn't allowed to cry.

"I don't want anything to happen to you and sometimes I feel as though you care more about the game more than you do me" I said quickly and he began to laugh making me grow angry. I was about to stand but he held his arm out so I wouldn't move and he took another hit of his blunt.

"All those times when you were a kid i'd take off from work when you were faking sick or all those times i'd keep you home from school because I missed you and wanted to spend some time with you, and you still don't think I care?" He asked and I shook my head no.

"That was then and this is now" I said finally looking up at him and his face grew serious and he pulled me closer wrapping his arm around me and looked around at our surroundings. I noticed some of our security circling the neighborhood while another hand full of them parked down the street from us.

"Your older Cal I figured you'd want some freedom like I did when I was younger if you don't let me know how you feel how the fuck am I suppose to know?" He said raising his voice and I looked down shrugging.

"I'm not trying to be emotional or act like a bitch it's just with Tristan being dead it really sunk in that we aren't safe and any of us could die whenever" I said and he began chuckling as he looked up at me and wiped a tear from my eye that I didn't even know had fallen.

"You good Cal, just calm down I ain't mean to make you feel like I don't give a fuck about you cause I do love you and you the most important person in my life. I do all this for you" He shrugged and I started chuckling causing him to give me a mug, my father hated getting into his feelings so it was weird even having this conversation with him right now.

"I understand, and i'll start speaking up more because your right, you can't read minds" I said and he nodded as he glanced down at his ringing phone and hit ignore.