Chapter 1

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Chris' POV:

"Bill, please take your medications. I'm begging."

"No I'll be fine I promise."

"Joshua Balz! Don't you dare deny it! I know you're hiding something from me!"

"This debt is gonna kill me before these kids do I swear.."

I was currently sitting with my freaky family at the dinner table and I was about to lose it. I ran my hands through my hair keeping my head down, the constant talking and yelling turning into a piercing ringing in my ears. Everyone was going through something, and it would always be like this. The past 3 years have not been the best for any of us, from losing Kyle, to sending Johnnie away. From Bill getting sick, to Balz and Ryan Ashley constantly arguing after losing their baby.

Not only that, but a rival circus has taken over, leaving our crew practically without jobs. It was driving Manson into debt and he wasn't getting any younger.

Me? I've been growing, and the pain in my joints was becoming almost unbearable. It hurt to do the simplest things, like standing up or sitting down. Even making love with Ricky was getting harder to do.

I felt a familiar hand rest against my thigh and it snapped me out of my train of thoughts. I looked over to see a worried looking Ricky who gave me a small smile. I smiled back as best as I could and placed my hand over his. The arguing and pleadings weren't ending anytime soon and I finally snapped. I stood up slamming my hands against the table causing everybody to immediately freeze in their spots. Finally it was quiet, everyone had their eyes on me.

I hung my head taking a deep breath before finally looking up at my family.

"Where are we? Where did we all go?"
Nobody said anything. I scammed each one if their faces until I landed on Manson. I bit my lip holding back the tears in my eyes as I gazed at the man who was like...is my father. Who raised me, cared for me and everyone here.

"Manson, you raised me all these years. Taught me things and treated me like a son. You've seen me struggle, and it kills me to see you struggling now." I paused slowly sitting back down, hissing slightly at the pain I felt in my knees.

"But all of this arguing, and negativity is not going to help any of us. It won't help save the show. It's been what? Almost 2 months since our first real show. It's being taken over by another circus, and instead of trying to figure out a solution, we're just constantly at each others throats."

Manson let out a sigh rubbing his temple with his fingers and I could see a look of relief in his aging face.

"Chris, you are like my son. All of you are like my kids."

"This man." I pointed at Manson. "This man has raised us, fed us, clothed us and put a roof over our heads when we had nothing. Gave you guys a second chance!" I raised my voice at my last sentence. I gazed over at Balz and Ryan Ashley.

"Ashley, I am so so sorry about what happened. I can't imagine the pain of losing a child, but you letting your frustration out on Balz is not going to bring them back. I'm sorry if that sounds harsh, but guess what? This man has tried being there for you, and constantly does his best to make you happy." I pointed at Balz. Ryan Ashley had tears in her eyes as she looked over at her beloved fiance who looked back at her with a sad smile.

"I'm s-so sorry Josh. I...i j-just.." her voice was shaking but Balz just hugged her letting her cry in his shoulder.

"I love you Ryan Ashley." He kissed the side of her head.

I turned my attention to the conjoined twins who bit their lips occasionally looking at each other.

"You two. Especially you Bill. You're sick, and you have got to understand that it affects your brother. As conjoined twins, you feel each others pain. Bill, you may think you're fine, but I can see Tom paying for your selfishness. Just take care of yourself so you can take care of your brother. You're not strong on your own, you're stronger together."

Bill gazed over at his twin who rubbed his back and handed him his medication bottle. He took it and nodded before finally taking it making Tom smile.

"Alex, Kyle is dead, Johnnie is getting help. You can't blame anybody, and you especially can't blame yourself. There are things we can't control in life. But they would want you to be happy."

Alex leaned back in her seat not even trying to look up at anybody and folded her arms across her chest. I sighed knowing she wouldn't say anything so I just scanned the rest of my family, my eyes landing on my little brother.

"We are a family, we shouldn't be hateful. We have to forgive, accept each others flaws but most importantly we need to learn to take care of each other. Like Manson has done for each one of us. Kuza, you've done so much to hurt me, to hurt us. But we forgive you. Manson forgave you, and took you and your friends in." Kuza smiled up at me, Matt placing a hand on his shoulder.

"So what are we supposed to do about the rival circus?" Ricky perked up.

"Well, the best we can do is finally find out what we're up against. There is room for two freak shows, but they clearly don't feel the same if they're trying to compete with us." Manson spoke up. I nodded agreeing with him.

"They're supposed to have their next show tomorrow night here in Dallas. Let's just go as customers and check it out. Maybe talk to the manager and smooth things out."

We all agreed and finished dinner, in peace for once.

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After dinner I went back to mine and Ricky's trailer to find the cute kitten licking the back of his hands. I couldn't help but giggle at him and I shut the door catching his attention. His ears perked up, his face a blushing mess.

"Don't judge me, I can't help myself." He huffed. I walked over slowly sitting down on the bed next to him and pulled him into a hug. He hugged back and I smiled resting my head against his soft hair. Ricky has grown so much, it was crazy we were together for 3 years now. It's been a bumpy ride, but maybe after tonight it will all get better.

"Chris? Does it still hurt?" Ricky asked in a hush voice. I looked down at the blue eyed beauty and chewed on my lip piercings.

"Just a little baby. I'll be fine okay?" He hesitated at first but nodded.

We got ready for bed and turned the lights off. It hurt to lay back but I ignored the pain as Ricky cuddled up to my side. Hearing his soft snoring/purring was so soothing. I closed my eyes holding onto the kitten drifting off into a deep sleep.

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Soooo, what do you guys think? So much drama all in the first Chapter! I love it though. I'm excited to write this new story and I hope you all are excited to read It!

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