Lil Mama

seventeen

Westbrook, Morgan ✨

"I got you. Just breathe."

Rylie and I got out the car and walked to Janet's front door. I knocked and soon Kalacia opened the door with her eyes bloodshot red. It caused Rylie and I to ask. "What's wrong?"

Laci shook her head as she looked at my daughter. "I told her Ry. I told her and now she's upset. She's in her room crying. You told me it would help!"

"It did help! You feel better don't you?" My daughter yelled back as I looked on in confusion before finally getting tired of it.

"Okay... What's going on?" I asked.

"I- I got... my moms boyfriend used to molest me and I told ma and now she's upset— I think at me. I don't know. I just don't want her to be upset Miss Morgan." Kalacia filled me in just for my heart to drop at her words. How was she just saying it clearly like this? I would be breaking down. When I opened my arms she shook her head. "No Miss Morgan, I'm okay. Just go talk to ma please. I'm fine. Seriously, I'm fine."

"Girls, I'll be in the room. Please. Don't leave the house." I walked passed them and into my girlfriends house. Walking to her room, I saw that the door was shut so I knocked and tried to open it but it was locked. Knocking again, I spoke. "Baby, it's me. Let me in."

I thought I was going to be ignored as well but I heard the lock click. Opening the door myself, I closed it behind me after I got in. She had her back turned to me and spoke. "I'm fine."

"Look at me." I mumbled.

Her back stayed turned to me as she mumbled. "I'm fine." Sighing softly, I walked up behind her and wrapped my arms around her waist. I felt her exhale before her hands went over mines. "Baby, I'm okay."

"Who're you trying to convince? Me or yourself?"

She put her head down. "I just... baby I'll be okay."

"What's happening?"

"She—..." Janet pried my hands away from her as she walked to the other side of the room almost. "I can't even say it again."

"No, that's not what I'm asking, I'm asking what's going on with you baby? What are you thinking? What are you feeling? Talk to me."

"I left her. I wasn't there. For two months Morgan. Two whole months." Her hands went to her head as she shook it. "My mom told me to take her, she told me she didn't want me to leave her there but Rene was stuck in his ways. The relationship wasn't healthy. I couldn't take her from one toxic thing into another and I blame myself for that. I mean who else is there to blame? This is my fault. This is on me Morgan. I left her there. I left her there to get raped. I believed her mom when she said she was fine. I should have known better. Laci's never went months without talking to me but after I left she did and my dumb ass never questioned it. How could I not have questioned it Morgan?"

Her eyes met with mines as she awaited my answer. My heart was now aching for Kalacia and my girlfriend. "This isn't your fault."

She scoffed. "Morgan—."

"How could you have known? Janet, you can't change what happened. You can't go back and change it, even though I know you want to. You can't erase the trauma but you can help her heal. You're here now and right now the child is stressed out, not about herself but about you. She's not even worried about herself, she's just worried about the fact that you might be mad at her."

Janet shook her head. "I'm not mad at her. Why would she think—. I just didn't want her to see me crying."

"Baby, I get that, I do, but she just needs you right now. Rylie's out there doing what she can, but it's on you. Just hold her right now Janet, I think that's all she wants."

"Morgan, I can't do that right now." My girlfriend mumbled. "I'm sorry but I can't, I don't even know how to look at her knowing that I failed her."

"You didn't fail her. She doesn't even think you failed her. Baby... listen to me, she just wants to be held. You don't have to say anything. You just need to hold your daughter. Okay?"

I watched patiently as she nodded. "Okay."

She opened her door but stopped and I got in front of her and pulled her towards the living room. I wasn't quite sure where the girls were but found them sitting on the couch. Rylie was holding Kalacia as she cried. Looking at Janet, I motioned her forward and she sat on the couch next to Laci. She pulled her away from Rylie and into her.

Laci cried harder into Janet's chest. "I'm sorry ma. I'm sorry."

Janet shook her head as her grip tightened around Kalacia. "No, don't be sorry. Don't be sorry, I just needed a second pumpkin. That's all."

"I don't wanna go back. Don't make me go back ma."

"You don't have to go back Laci, she signed her rights over. You never have to go back and as long as I have breath in my body, you won't go back. I'll make sure of that."

Laci mumbled. "I love you ma."

"I love you more."

It went silent and Rylie looked at me and sighed before speaking. "Let's eat ice-cream and dance and take naps. It's girly, which is way below my pay grade, but it'll make Laci feel better. So let's do it."

We all glanced at her before Laci sat up. "That is the most corniest idea I've ever heard." She stood. "But it'll make me feel better so I'm in. Totally in."

Janet leaned up and chuckled. "I'm in."

"I'm down with whatever you three are down with." I agreed.

"Alright then, let's get jazzy." Rylie danced as she stood up as well.

Kalacia laughed. "You're a cluck." She walked over to the sound bar and turned it on. Soon some 90's R&B was playing and Janet and I looked at Laci who shrugged. "I was born in the wrong era, what can I say?"