"if only.." TordTom highschool au

•14•

I woke up and laid in bed. I couldn't move but there was a figure standing over me. It was straight up black but I really couldn't move, talk, nothing.

I looked around the room realizing I was back at my house, my eyes soon adjusting to the dark.

I realized the figure standing over me was my father after he slapped me as hard as he could, leaving me confused. I was eventually able to move again but I didn't.

My father punched me as hard as he could in the stomach and made me couch up a bit of blood but that's it and walked away.

As soon as he did I sat up and looked in a mirror. Thanks blood was black. Everything was black. Everything went black.

I passed out but immediately woke up again in a black room holding my head. I looked around and there was Tord, just standing there in the darkness.

I went to reach out for him but then there was Edd, hugging his back, slipping his hands in Tord's shirt. He looked at me with this evil smile as he did this.

My heart dropped.

I can't handle this shit.

Why can't it be over already?!

Then they disappeared, but then Matt showed up. He was behind me and hugged onto me.

I shivered a bit as I felt his warm breath against my neck. I immediately went into panic mode and tried pushing away from him.

Then there was the black tears, staning my pale cheeks and my hands as I rubbed my face.

Matt soon disappeared as well and I fell to the ground and just cried before my monster showed up.

He sat in front of me and patted my head. I looked at him and hugged onto the monster tightly as I cried. "I-Is it over Tommy....?" I asked and got a small nod from the monster.

I didn't know what to call the monster so I just named him after my bear... They're both special to me and they're both always there for me so it works...

"If it wasn't over I wouldn't be here silly." Tommy told me with a small chuckle as I let him go and wiped my black tears away with my head down.

After that I explained to him my dream. I explained to him my feelings but I left out the Matt part, I'm still confused onto what that was about but that was NOT ok.

He said some things to me and told me every was going to be ok cause he was there, which calmed me down a bit. Then we just started to talk.

I always talked to him as if he was someone I've known my entire life. I was just comfortable with him like that, he was my best friend and I trust Tommy.

"It's almost time for school, Thomas. You need to wake up now."

"I don't want too... Can I stay here please.."

He sighed. "not yet, Thomas."

I whimpered a bit and hugged him once more before he disappeared and I was left alone again only to wake up in a few minutes.

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I woke up with a giant bruise on my stomach but I didn't think much about it and just started getting ready for school.

I threw on a dark blue hoodie with black and white checkers down the sleeves and some black ripped jeans before going to the bathroom to wash my face.

I looked at myself in the mirror just to see some pretty bad dark spots under my eyes and faded black streaks down my face. I just washed them off with a sigh and went to grab my bag where I saw Tord grabbing his.

"Good morning Tom." He smiled at me and I just gave him a weak wave and grabbed my stuff before heading out and he followed close behind me.

"Still not talking, huh?" He sighed and I just shrugged. "you have therapy today after school by the way."

I just shot Tord a glare as we walked to our school, gripping the straps of my bag tightly. "oh and, I saw the pictures of that girl on your side of the room, is that your mother?"

I gave him a small nod and looked down at the floor.

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After lunch i usually meet up with Edd and Matt but I don't think I can face them so I just went to the flower garden and sat in front of my tree with a rose in my hand and stared at it for awhile.

The thoughts of my dream filled my head to the point to where I started squeezing the steam of the rose, the thorns stabbing into my hand and making me bleed but at least it wasn't black blood, right..?

I kept doing this until I felt a hand on my shoulder. I snapped out of my thought and looked up to see Tord.

"What's wrong..." He sat next to me and took the rose away and set it next to me while I just stared at my hands and held back my tears. I refuse to cry in front of this bastard.

If I cry that means I'm weak and I'm not weak. I need to hide my emotions. No one needs to know anything. I don't even need to be happy.

I don't need to be happy.

I don't need to be sad.

I don't need to be mad.

I don't need to be scared.

I don't need to have emotions.

I then started crying. Wait, why am I crying?? No. NO! STOP. YOU FUCKING IDIOT STOP CRYING HE CANT SEE YOU CRY. HE MUST THINK YOU'RE WEAK NOW.

But I am weak...

I'm sorry..

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Why hello there my readers 👀
How are yas?
I can't remember if I got Fanart or not and I'm sorry qwq if you sent me some and I didn't post it on here just dm me to show me where to find it and I swear I'll post it in the next chapter Oki?♥
Sorry for typos ^^;
{1033 words}
Love you all, bye!