BAD HABITS | ethan dolan

:waiting for miracles

D A Y N I N E T E E N
ᴰᵒⁿ'ᵗ ᵇᵉˡⁱᵉᵛᵉ ⁱⁿ ᵐⁱʳᵃᶜˡᵉˢ ⁻ ᵈᵉᵖᵉⁿᵈ ᵒⁿ ᵗʰᵉᵐ

He didn't come to see her again, in fact he made sure that when he left for the airport that he sprinted to the car and didn't even give August's hut a second glance.

August had sat and waited the first few days, she thought that maybe it was just like last time but then it turned into longer than just a few days and after a week she started to doubt her thoughts.

She wanted to start up her bad habits again, truthfully she'd wanted to start again since the day they parted but she couldn't even pick up a cigarette without thinking of his face.

It was so unfair all the she could think about was the way he held her when they slept together or their kisses when they were heated or just soft ones that were placed upon her forehead or her cheek.

August couldn't believe that she'd allowed herself to fall for him but it just seemed so easy to fall for the good guy who was trying to help her.

She must've known that he wasn't going to stay forever because he was an LA boy and she was sure that he needed to head home at some point but she had hoped he would've at least had the decency to say goodbye.

She just wanted one last hug, one last kiss, one last time where she felt safe and like she didn't need any of her bad habits at all.

All she needed was him and he was just gone.

Just like that he was gone as quick as he came and now when she sat on her veranda and sombrely looked over to the ledge he used to swing on she'd instead be faced with drying swim suits.

A family had moved in to the hut almost as soon as the boys had fled and it was like August was just meant to forget it even happened.

Five days after the new family had arrived she swung onto her veranda at almost midnight and watched long out into the night, she wondered if maybe he'd left her a clue.

Maybe his phone number?

But she hadn't found anything and yet she had her fingers crossed every single night that the upcoming morning it would all just be a nightmare and the boy of her dreams would wake her up with breakfast once again.

He was there to break her habits but yet he had seemed to give her one she didn't think she even possessed prior,

August was waiting for miracles.

She'd never done that before because she'd had nothing to wait for, nothing actually worth being her miracle. But Ethan, he was different, she wanted nothing more than for him to come back.

And he didn't.

He didn't leave her any clues, nothing to keep in touch.

He didn't say goodbye not even after he'd told her he loved her.

She glanced at her feet as they dangled off the edge it was a far jump to the floor not that she was thinking about jumping just that now she knew there was no one to stop her doing such impulsive things.

She missed him and that was the whole truth.

With their talk of New Jersey she had even thought about heading back home to see her adoptive parents just hoping that by some miracle she'd run into the pair.

It was stupid, she was stupid.

August sighed, she needed to say goodbye to Ethan Dolan and whatever she thought was going to come from their fling.