Worries

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The night air continued cold, carrying the message the wind wanted delivered. The moon continued hidden behind the misty clouds, covering its light and forbidding it from lighting up the cold streets, blocking out the dim street lights that flickered.

The wind slowly picked up allowing its howls to flow freely against the windows while picking up the loose strands of hair that stood out of the braid and throwing them from side to side before calming down once more and restoring the peacefulness of the night.

A sigh broke through the silent cries of the wind as my hands left my face and I rose from my sitting position. My body shivered lightly as if to tell me to go back inside. This time... I did as asked... walking up the three steps of the building I found myself within the cold hallway with doors on either side and two elevators at the end of it.

My feet, against my will, walked slowly towards the first elevator causing the not so silent steps to bounce off the walls. Once in front of the doors, my hand found its way to the buttons, pushing one and, inevitably, calling the man-made mechanical device to the ground floor, telling it to come and get me.

Once the doors opened I stepped in and pressed the button to the seventh floor. It took me up slowly and each passing floor was an agonizing wait, until, finally, my destination was reached and I stepped out of the elevator, into the dimly lighted hallway and towards the front door I had previously walked out of. It wasn't locked making my entry quite easy. 'Should have locked it...'

Closing the door and locking it behind me, I looked in the direction of the windows. No Arsenal.

Rolling my eyes I moved to stand next to one of the smaller windows before placing my hands on the window seal and hoisting myself up onto it. Inevitably, sitting down as I wanted.

Looking outside, I stared at the spot where Mariana and I had talked, noticing that the moon had been freed from its hidden prison, free to shine its light once more. One of the street lights in front of the building officially decided to quit its everyday job, only to be fixed the next day, getting ripped away from its holiday. The wind hit the windows lightly, being repelled backwards while howling in pain. And the streets remained empty as if no living soul had ever encountered their way onto it.

After some time of just staring aimlessly at the gloomy scenery outside the window and below my feet, my mind began to drift away, thinking of everything that had happened until now. I have done this plenty of times, though, it hadn't proven to help in any way until now... maybe thinking of everything only made it more confusing... but I had nothing else I could do.

I was against the idea of talking to the others... I know they're struggling as well and I would much rather not burden them with my worries and traumas. The betrayal from Claire still hurt... It cut deep and I don't like it... it made me feel uneasy, uncomfortable and... mad. Yes, it hurt like hell to be betrayed by your best friend, but it was more unnerving to know that she was being forced to do it. She was being controlled and there was nothing that could be done about it.

Another aspect of these last two months that still makes and will continue making me feel uneasy for a long time, is the traumatic torture the Reach put me and the others through. I'm very well aware that, that trauma will live on with us for a long time and that we may never get over it...

Most people will probably say that we should talk about our fears, our worries, our nerves... our traumas... but I'm not sure if that will help.

I am and always will be, against burdening people with my problems. With my worries. With my issues. They're mine to solve and I don't want anyone's pity. When I'm ready to talk I will and sooner or later these things will slowly dissipate... they will never truly disappear, but they will get better...

A loud yawn escaped my lips, consuming the comfortable silence that I had been wrapped in. "If you're  sleepy you should probably go back to bed." My yawn must have muffled the footsteps of whoever had spoken since I didn't hear them walk in nor did I hear a door opening.

"What woke you?"

"Your heavy footsteps."

"Jerk."

"Truthful." By the sound of the male voice that rang through the living/dining room, I could already tell who it was. By the sound of it, he had just woken up a few minutes ago.

I tiredly looked at the person, not surprised to say that it was Tye, who was leaning against the door frame to the room both he and Virgil were sharing at the moment. Saying nothing I hopped off the window seal causing a loud screech from the floorboards underneath my feet making both me and Tye freeze for a second before hearing Virgil's snores.

Relaxing almost instantly, I allowed my feet to guide me to Tye whose only response to my presence was a pat on the head before he headed to the bathroom. I watched as the door closed and I was secluded again. I didn't think of waiting for him to say goodnight as I moved into the room, closing the door behind me, throwing my sneakers onto the floor and face-planting onto the bed.

After a while I allowed myself to look up and to take my face away from the bedsheets that forbade my breathing. Looking around the room I took it all in. Two beds parallel to each other, two bedside tables next to said beds, and a big wardrobe next to the door carved into the wall.

It was a nice room I'd give it that much, but it was too empty which only indicated that we had just arrived and wouldn't be staying here for long. The only question now was... what was gonna happen to us from here on out? How long would it be until the Reach was kicked out? How long would it be until everything went back to normal?

With those questions running around in my mind, my eyes grew tired and my limbs heavy. Sleep was taking over and I was gonna let it do as it pleased, it wouldn't do me any good to stay up and worry more. Closing my eyes I allowed the blissful darkness to overtake me. The peaceful slumber that surrounded me preventing me from hearing loud creaking door that would usually make me jump as I fell asleep.

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"F-Felicidade!" She ran over to me and glomped me in a tight hug. "Sentia tantas saudades tuas. (I missed you so much.)" My eyes softened as I returned the embrace. "Estou tão feliz por saber que isto é real!" She shook lightly, causing me to pat her head.

"I've missed you too."

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