Chapter 26: Am I Really That Bad?

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The next few days - four actually - go by at an exceedingly fast pace, and the next thing I know, I’m sitting on Jansen’s father’s jet on the way back to California. So in all we spent eleven days there, and now we’re going back to Vernon. I don’t know where we are, and everyone else on the jet besides Ryder is asleep, so I’m not gonna ask him. We’ve been on here for about eleven hours though.

Ever since that day I told Ryder to forget about it, he seemingly has. He hasn’t uttered a single word to me since I walked out of the room that day when Marissa, Matt and I hung out. Whether he’s mad at me now or what, I don’t know. I guess he did go to the doctor though. His left hand is wrapped tightly in some adhesive looking gauze.

I look out of the window, and all I see is what I believe to be is water. We’re so high up, so I guess it could be anything, but it looks like an ocean. I look around at everyone else on the jet out of bored-ness. Marissa is sitting up in the front with her brother, Ryder’s sitting alone, Mollie is sitting with Jansen and Faith and Matt’s closest to me, but not actually in my row.

Luckily, Matt has simmered down on all of the flirting and innuendoes since my and Ryder’s break up. He and Marissa both, I think, are trying to keep me busy, not give me time to think about it. That day we hung out, we didn’t come back to the house for like ten hours. We went to a carnival thing, the harbor, we went to the zoo, to the strip mall and we got our portrait drawn by one of those street drawing people. Marissa’s choice.

I’m just ready to be off the jet and on solid ground again. 

A few hours later, the jet lands and Ryder’s the first one out of his seatbelt. I guess he wasn’t really asleep then. He stands up, looks over at me for half a second and then the door of the jet opens down, and he walks down the stairs. I follow suit, getting out of my seatbelt and standing up. I hit Marissa and Matt both in their heads as I walk by them to wake them. We all grab out luggage and get out.

There’s three cars here for us, one of them Sarah’s, and the other two, I don’t know. I say bye to the others and walk over to Sarah’s car. I don’t know how she knew that we were coming back today, but apparently she did. I slide in the backseat, and Ryder gets in the front, closing the door wordlessly. 

Marissa and Cash get into a silver Honda car, which I guess is being driven by one of their parents, and Matt gets into last car with Faith, Mollie and Jansen. Sarah looks over at Ryder and then looks up in the rearview mirror at me. I avert my eyes and look out of the window.

        “So how was Australia?” Sarah asks. Neither Ryder, nor I say anything and Sarah clears her throat. “Good then?”

When neither of us replies, she says, “Okay.” Then she starts the car and drives out of the strip and onto the road. I pull my phone from my pocket, and unlock it, turning it off of Airplane mode. The ride back to the O’Connor’s home is quiet and not to mention awkward. Very awkward.

When we make it back we both get out, I grab my luggage, Ryder grabs his and Sarah unlocks the door, ushering us in. Ryder goes up the stairs quickly, and I follow behind him, a few steps behind. He goes into his room and softly closes the door, and I do the same. I plop down on the bed, lying back and looking up at the ceiling.

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