This Town

Chapter Fifty One

I wanted to follow her but she went into some back room. The bartender said she usually freshens up and comes back out to talk to people. So I waited. And waited.

"Ahem. Excuse me everyone." I turned to see the bartender up at the stage. "Siobhan is suddenly not feeling very well and has decided she doesn't want to risk anyone getting sick. She's left her EPs here for anyone who would like to purchase. She apologizes and says she'll see us all next month."

When he got back over to me I already had my money out. She was still close by. She had to be. I paid and ran out the door. Looking up and down the street I couldn't tell which way I needed to go. I scanned the heads of the people walking. She was nowhere in sight. It took me eighteen months to find her and she was gone again. I just didn't understand why she didn't want to talk to me. I went back inside.

"Hey, I meant to grab one of her records. Any left?" I asked.

"Excuse me, sir," I heard behind me. I turned to see a petite brunette standing behind me. She leaned in, "Are you Niall?" she whispered. I could only nod. "She left this for you." The girl handed me one of Siobhan's records.

"Thanks. How much?"

"Nothing. She simply asked me to hand it to you as she left. For a minute, I thought you'd left before I could."

"Thanks," I nodded to her. She walked off and I went home.

When I got there, the rain had started coming down again. I got inside and changed before I picked up the EP. I opened it and pulled out the cd and put it in my player. I sat down as the first song began to play. I closed my eyes as the chords filled the room and then her voice. When the song ended I had come to realize I had started crying. Started crying for all the things I never said to her; all the things I never did for her. She was the one person in this world who looked at me and saw me.

I opened my eyes and wiped away the tears. I picked up the cd case and pulled out the insert. The cover image was a close up of her face, her hair blonde with strands blowing around her, her eyes a shade of blue I had never seen before. I flipped the little booklet open and read over the lyrics. When I got to the end, there was a small dedication that read, "To the boy I fell in love with, you have been by my side since I was young. Thank you for letting me fly alone for a little while. Whatever we are, whatever we may become, I still remember the way we were."

I spent days in this hazed out stupor with nothing on my mind. I had her record on repeat, looking for clues, hints, anything that would point me in the right direction. And then it dawned on me, she would be back! The bartender had said she played there every month. Thus, she would be there next month. So I bided my time, writing lyrics and music to my own songs.

The following month, I went back. "Excuse me?" I asked the bartender, "When is the next time that Siobhan Kelly will be performing here?"

"Not until October, unfortunately, she is doing some sort of little tour at local pubs across the UK and Ireland, I believe."

"October!" I was stunned and heartbroken.

"Yeah, sorry dude. I think there's a flyer up on one of our boards that lists the dates." The guy pointed to the other side of the bar.

I walked over and stood there forever, but saw no sign of a sign with her name or face on it. As I turned to leave, upset but determined to wait until October, if need be, I saw another board, smaller, with only a few pieces of paper on it and one was hers!

"Aha!" I said, to myself as I scanned the sheet with the places and dates, my eyes landing on her Ireland dates, "You can run little girl, but you can no longer hide." I took a picture of it with my phone and made my way out the door.

Her UK dates were spread out, but her Irish dates were all clumped together around the end of August and beginning of September. One date was left blank - the anniversary of her father's death. She had carved out that date to go home. I just knew that was it! And I was going to make sure I was there.

I spent the next couple of weeks working on this one song I had been fiddling with for a few days. Seeing as how she had written about her experiences, I figured I could do the same. I worked hard to get it finished before I went home to see her. I made a small acoustic recording that I was going to hand to her. She used to always listen to my demos and give her opinion, I hoped she would do the same this time around.

When the time came to fly home, I did so but before heading to Mullingar, stuck around Dublin for her first Irish performance at a local pub there, famous for having up-and-coming musical acts. Many people had been "discovered" there in the past.

The place was rather crowded that evening. There were two performances, hers was to be the first. I got a decent seat that hid me but allowed me to see her, plus it would be a little darker once she came on.

When she was introduced, there was a warm applause for the local girl. She took her seat and performed her songs. She sang many of the same ones that were on her EP as well as a few cover songs.

When she finished, she got much louder applause from the crowd, who by then, had had more to drink and were a little more rowdy, which is why she came on first. Her music wasn't exactly meant for the bar crowd, but they all seemed to enjoy it.

She exited the stage and about 15 minutes later, I saw her come out and meet with people and try to sell her record to them. I had noticed that many had bought it, which was nice to see. I watched as she made her way through the crowd. At one moment, I thought she saw me and felt that it was my chance to get her to talk to me but I froze. I was terrified that if she saw me, she would run again. So, instead, I sat back in my corner and just watched her. The purple was gone, replaced with a pale blue. Her smile seemed normal and yet was slightly off, as if she wasn't fully committed to the smile or something. It seems strange to say that, but I knew her better than anyone else; I knew what her real smile looked like. Despite the time and distance, I still knew her.

After awhile, the next performance began and I noticed her sneak out the door. I had already paid my tab and made my way out the door, as well. When I got outside, she had disappeared into the crowd. No worries, I would see her tomorrow when she finally came home.