Beautifully Broken

- 36 -

I couldn't sleep last night. I have this bad feeling about everything going right at the moment. I see the pattern in my life, nothing good ever lasts long.

But this is one thing that I don't want to turn bad.

I'm happy

I've waited for the longest time to say that. I've wondered for a long time if it was ever going to happen to me. I'm probably jumping the gun when I say I love Cole, but for the love of all humanity whatever this is I want it to stay.

Around 3:30 a.m. I wriggled away from Cole's stronghold and sat at the edge of the window. Now, two hours later, I'm currently gazing at the sunrise. I was about to say that I couldn't remember the last sunrise I watched: but I can.

"Daddy, you're my best friend," I look up adoringly at my father. His warm ivory skin glowed under the orange tones of the sunrise. He woke me up early that morning because I said previously that I wanted to see one.

He wraps his large arm around my shoulder, pulling me into his chest. His cologne smelling of caramel liqueur, leather, and wood. The same cologne Mommy took me to buy for him last Christmas. I smile as I let myself enjoy the moment.

"Listen, baby girl, I'm going to have to go to work soon," My father sighs checking his watch, I pout.

"I don't want you to leave," I whine, hugging him closer.

"Darling, I will always be here," He picks up my chin, "I'm coming back," He chuckles.

"You promise?" I hold out my pinky, pout lifting into a small smile as it always did when he cheered me up.

"Always." He links pinkies with mine.

"Always," I whisper to myself, quickly wiping the small tear that manages to get past my eyelashes.

I often think about how a man I loved greatly could do so much harm to someone else. I wouldn't say I dwell on it. It's a question that can never be answered or explained. Therefore, that is what haunts me.

I turn back to the bed. Cole's body perched on one elbow, already looking at me. I shoot him a small smile, moving to sit next to him. My hands fall into his russet brown locks and my legs fall on top of his.

"Beautiful sky," I comment looking back at the window.

"What were you thinking about?" The sleepy devil asks, eyes not leaving my face.

Lying crossed my mind. Saying a quick "nothing" and letting it go.

It truly was nothing. The tear was simply a reaction of the body and not of the mind. Nevertheless, the look of Cole's eyes peering up at me and his pure curiosity swayed me to open up to him.

"My father," I state.

Immediate regret hits me as I remember that my father wasn't just my father. He was a killer, the murder of Cole's mother to be exact. I looked quickly back at Cole to retract my statement. Cole's face appeared unaffected, as a matter of fact, he seemed even more sympathetic.

"What about him?" No sharpness in his tone detected.

"I don't know," I shrug, "I just remembered the last sunrise I was and it was with him,"

"So I guess that tear was because of how beautiful the colors were, right?" He asks sarcastically, sitting all the way up now. Back pressed against the headboard.

I sigh, "I just remembered the promises he made and how much I wanted to be around him,"

"My father may have not been a good man, but he was good to me,"