what you can't have (b.e.)

comfort crowd

A/N: i'm on break now so hopefully i'll be posting a lot more frequently for the next month !!!

inspo: comfort crowd, my boi conan

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This hurt that I'm holding's getting heavy, but I'ma keep a smile on my shoulders til' I'm sweaty...

Billie's POV:

"And this is my room!" Molly grins as she flings open the door. I stand nervously, not wanting to look around. The walls are covered in practically every picture of me ever taken, lyrics, quotes, everything. It feels like I stepped into A's lair in some twisted version of Pretty Little Liars.

She won't stop smiling and pats the bed next to her. I cautiously sit beside her, trying to think of what to do now. As soon as I sit down, she moves closer and it takes everything in me to keep smiling like this is totally normal. I can't even figure out why someone would care so much about me to go to these lengths to manipulate their way into my life.

"Hey, do you have any water?" I ask, hoping for some miracle that'll get me out of here. She nods eagerly and jumps up, running out the door to her kitchen. A second later she pokes her head back in the doorway and narrows her eyes at me.

"Don't move."

I fake another smile and give her an awkward thumbs-up, and she ducks out again. I almost start to break down and let my head fall into my hands, when I notice my phone slipped out of her pocket and is laying right beside me. All the fear slips away as I grab it so fast I almost drop it.

I see a thousand messages from Finneas, begging me for answers, a lot of them assuming Mila and I ran away from the pressure of touring. I don't waste time reading them and my fingers tremble so hard I'm barely able to type. I hear footsteps so I quickly text 'sos' and send him my location, then slip my phone into my hoodie.

I take the glass of water she hands me with shaking hands, a lot of it spills into my lap and I don't bother drinking it. I don't trust her in the slightest. So I try my next idea.

"Hey, I love your style dude! Can you show me your closet?" I act casual and she blushes and leads me to one end of her room. She opens the closet and leans in to pull something out and I don't think, just act. I shove her into the closet, hard, then slam the door shut, trembling as I twist the lock.

Not wasting another second, I run out of the bedroom, screaming Mila's name all throughout the house, hearing no answer, except Molly pounding on the door, and I don't know how sturdy it is or how much time I have.

When I've searched the first two floors, I find a door into a basement with no light. I turn the flashlight on my phone on and gulp as I make my way down the creaky steps.

"Mila?" my voice is barely a whisper, and I try to pull it together, screaming it this time.

Mila's POV:

Begging on my knees, screaming 'someone come and help me,' but by the time they're there, I've already hid the body...

I don't know how much time has passed down here, but it feels like a lifetime already. All I can do is imagine the worst scenarios, that Billie thinks I deserted her and moved onto the next city, leaving me here forever. I rock back and forth, my knees pulled into my chest, sobbing so loud I can't even hear myself think.

I feel like I've killed off a thousand versions of myself, and every day I do it all over again, becoming someone new, I don't even know who I am anymore. I know it must be horrible dating someone like me. What if Billie fell in love with who I was before, and is falling out of love with who I am now?