Random Kaitou Joker

Incorrect Quotes 3

Minna-san, Ohayo!

I hope you enjoy this chapter on incorrect quotes! If it brings a smile to your face, then mission accomplished!!

Anyways, enjoy the chapter!

=+=

Hachi, very angry with Joker: Joker-san, I'm at a loss for words!

*Proceeds to lecture Joker for ten minutes*

Joker, mutters under his breath: You are at a loss for words and yet you lecture me for ten minutes...

Hachi: What was that?

Joker: Nothing, Hachi.

----------(•_•)----------

Rose: Here hold this for me.

Queen:

Queen: Rose, this is your hand.

----------(•_•)----------

Spade: Who broke the coffee pot? I'm not mad, I just want to know.

Rose: I did. I broke it.

Spade: No. No, you didn't. Joker?

Joker: Don't look at me, look at Queen.

Queen: What?! I didn't break it!

Joker: Huh, that's weird. How'd you even know it was broken?

Queen: Because it's sitting right in front of us and it's broken.

Joker:

Joker: Suspicious.

Queen: No, it's not!

Shadow: If it matters, probably not... Ai was the last one to use it.

Ai: Liar! I don't even drink that crap!

Shadow: Oh, really? Then what were you doing by the coffee cart earlier?

Ai: I use the wooden stirrers to push back my cuticles. Everyone knows that, Shadow!

Rose: Okay, let's not fight. I broke it. Let me pay for it, Spade.

Spade: No! Who broke it?!

Queen, whispering: Spade, Hachi's been awfully quiet-

Hachi: REALLY.

Queen: Yeah, really!

Hachi: OH MY GOD-

(yelling ensues)

Spade, to the camera: I broke it. It burned my hand so I punched it. I predict that ten minutes from now they'll be at each other's throats with war paint on their faces and a pig head on a stick.

----------(•_•)----------

Joker: I feel like we all need a Hachi in our lives.

Joker: If it weren't for him I would have burned something down by now.

Joker: *Pulls out blowtorch* But he ain't here now!

Hachi: Joker, no.

Joker: Fuck-

----------(•_•)----------

Spade: Why are you so dramatic?

Joker: Because I have deep-seated emotional issues from my parents dying at such a young age and how people dressed up as my parents to steal the treasure that my parents owned of which they gave the key to me days before they died. That's not even mentioning at the fact I've come into close contact with death several times because of all the robbers that tried to steal the previously mentioned treasure. Now, I cover it up with acting more flamboyant and over dramatic so I don't have to deal with my emotional issues and repressed trust and abandonment issues.

Spade: What?

Joker: What.

----------(•_•)----------

Joker, telling the story of his Kaitou days to his kids: So then I thought Hachi died so I decided to fall off a cliff.

Kaitou J: Why?

Joker: He's pretty much 90% of my impulse control.

----------(•_•)----------

Joker, on the phone calling 911:  HACHI IS LOSING A LOT OF BLOOD!! HACHI! They're asking what your blood type is!

Hachi: B positive-

Joker: I'm trying!!

----------(•_•)----------

Joker: Spade died of natural causes.

Hachi: You pushed him off a cliff.

Joker: Gravity's natural.

----------(•_•)----------

Joker: Remember that time you dared me to lick the swing set?

Hachi: No, I said "Joker-san, don't lick the swing set" and you said, "Don't tell me what to do Hachi!". And then you licked the swing set.

----------(•_•)----------

Joker: I hate my last name.

Akai: Why?

Joker: Because it's not yours ;)

Akai:

Joker:

Akai: Joker, your last name is Tsubasa as well.

=+=

That's finished now!

I don't really have anything to say as usual so I'll just say goodbye.

Buh-byyyyyeeeeee!

Welcome to the Shining Night!

May the stars guide you through this magnificent sight!