11 - Drunken Fool

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It's okay saying sorry, but when you are drunk you say what you really feel. ~Charles Darwin

Ashton's POV

I woke up when something smashed somewhere in the house, at first I had no idea where I was which only made the situation more terrifying. However my vision cleared and I noticed it was Luke's bedroom. Memories flowing back to me.

"Luke?" I squeaked when I noticed the once present body missing from the bed. "Lukey?" I stood up and walked down the stairs, seeing a light in the kitchen. I peaked my head inside and saw Luke. Hair messy, head leaned on the table with his arms. A bottle in one hand and soft cries coming out of his mouth. Against the wall was dripping alcohol and a broken bottle while several other bottles sat open.

"Luke?" I said softly as I walked closer towards him. He didn't say anything but I put a hand on his back, rubbing gently. "Are you okay?"

"Never." He whimpered.

"Have you been drinking?" I already knew the answer.

"I-I think." Luke lifted his head up. Running his free hand down his face. "I don't know what I'm doing, what's going on."

"Talk to me."

"I like Ashton, I-I really really do." Luke said, spinning the bottle around in his hand. Did he not know who he was talking to? "And I want to tell him what I told Michael and Cal. But, I remember Calum. And I remember Mikey and Calum's reaction. And yeah, if I told Ashton, I feel like he would just date me out of pity."

I blinked a few times. "That's not true."

"Yes it is, I don't want to be treated like I'm weak but that's what they'll do." Luke said, breaking into more cries. "I want I be treated like I always was."

"Luke," I sighed. "Do you even know who you're talking to?"

"Mummy." Luke mumbled and I felt my throat contract.

"Luke, do you remember what happened to your mum?" I asked.

"She-She got sad." Luke frowned. "Why do people get sad?"

"I don't know, maybe bad things happen to good people." I said.

"Why does everyone hate me?" Luke whimpered, lip quivering. "Why do I hate me?"

"Luke, you're drunk, you won't remember any of this." I sighed. "C'mon, let's get to bed."

"No!" Luke yelled and threw an alcohol filled bottle to the wall.

"Luke please." I said while taking a step farther.

"No no leave me alone!" Luke said while he fell on the floor in a fit of sobs. I bent down and picked him up, carrying him back up the stairs, while he sniffled in my grasp.

I set him down on the bed and he let out a mumble into the pillows. "I want Ashy.."

"I'm right here." I said softly as I sat down next to him. He looked over to me, reaching out he poked my nose before climbing onto my lap.

"I'm cold." Luke mumbled and I grabbed the blue blanket and pulled it up over him.

"Lay down on the bed." I said and Luke crawled off and did so. Staring into me with intense blue eyes.

"Lay with me." Luke said, a cracking voice. I did just that and let him curl into me. Despite the fact that he wreaked of alcohol I really didn't mind him.

"Luke you're drunk, so you won't remember this, but you're mine. And I'm going to take care of you." I said. "Whether you want me to or not, I'm always behind you."

"Okay." Luke nodded.

"Go to sleep." I said softly.

"I'm not tired." Luke huffed. "Everything is weird, Ashy. Like, it's a blurry mess."

"That's what happens when you drink."

"I wasn't drinking." Luke mumbled and nuzzled me. I leaned down and kissed the top of my head. "You confuse me."

"How come?"

"I want to be with you, fall for you, kiss you and be happy with you." Luke said. "But I'm worried that I won't be good enough, and that it won't be everything I want."

"Luke," I said quietly. "Sleep."

"It doesn't even matter," Luke sighed. "You don't like me anymore anyways."

"That's not true."

"You told Calum and you said it yourself." Luke sighed. "It's okay, I don't like me either."

"Luke.." I sighed.

"Goodnight Ashton." Luke said, leaning up and kissing my cheek. He laid down and eventually fell asleep while curling into me. I ran my fingers through his hair until I did the same.

The next morning I woke up to the feeling of Luke getting out of the bed, he rushed to the bathroom and I followed as he puked up his stomach contents. I rubbed his back gently and tried not to look at the vomit.

"You okay?" I asked.

"Hell what happened." Luke groaned as he say back on his ankles.

"You drank. A lot." I said and Luke went wide eyed and raced out of the bathroom, I heard his feet pounding down the stairs and followed after. Only to hear him gasp when he saw the kitchen.

Immediately he began to clean up.

"Luke care - " I was cut off by Luke yelled out profanities as he clutched his hand. "I was going to tell you to be careful but it's too late. Are you alright?" Luke turned a red palm to me and sighed. "My gosh.."

"I can take care of it." Luke sighed as he walked out.

"Well I'll finish cleaning." I rolled my eyes and picked up the mess.

"Go to school!" Luke yelled from the bathroom.

"How about no!" I hollered back and heard Luke groan and his bedroom door slam shut.

AUTHOR'S NOTIFICATION

Lol this chapter sucked and I have to do homework cause I have a lot :/ peace out.

Hugs, Kisses, Cuddles and Serenades xX

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