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Nightmares.

Xavier Amari.

The dark ash cloud loomed over the burning pack, the scent of burning wood, memories and bodies wafted into the air becoming a broken yet familiar memory, they had shattered what little hope I had for peace, for my own life and the lives of those I had known for just a little while, my knees stung, every part of me hurt as my form was covered in soot, but I was determined to get to them.


Determination alone cannot solve all problems, if it did, then I could've been there earlier to save them, the pack house was in flames that towered high in the sky, their hunger could not be quenched until they had devoured all, but that's not what stopped me, it was the massacre around me, the body parts and headless corpses of wolves I knew, it made my eyes sting even more as I ran as fast as I could not caring about how the flames would devour me.



A bite on my leg tore a scream from my lips, the wolf dragged me back, its menacing dark eyes were unforgiving. "Let him watch!" His voice called out from the midday darkness caused by the ash cloud, I knew him still, how could I not. "Zakari, what did you do, why did you do it?" I demanded as I harshly wiped away my tears, his careless chuckle made me angry yet my captor reminded me of my lack of strength, anger wouldn't keep me alive.



"I did what that fool of an alpha wouldn't do, I did what our father the oh so precious beta wouldn't do to preserve the peace." Zakari replied with a gleeful look in his eyes, he had achieved what he promised, the destruction of the pack, he had given them the choice, to step down and let him lead the wolves to a superior standing or he killed them all, from the look of how things were, the destruction, it was pretty obvious what my father and the alpha had chosen.


"So you killed them, and gave the pack away to savages with no remorse, you tore apart families and loved ones, so that you could show them that you were capable, how horrible can a person be, Zakari, letting the devil in to murder your family." I spat in response and as I finished my rant my body was thrown toward a nearby tree, bones and the tree shattered just then making me groan as I tried to stand.



"You've always been the smarter one, even if I was older by five years, your eyes have seen what this pack truly was and for that you should be grateful, it is your saving grace because I did what the outsiders didn't dare do and that's burn it all to the ground and remake it all anew, in our ideals." My older brother responded as my bones snapped back into place, it surprised him, I had always hidden the fact that I indeed had an inner being, a wolf like him and the rest of the pack, I just wanted our father to acknowledge him as the next beta and me as the weak second son.



"You surprise me, Xavier." The wolf in front of me whispered as the one who had thrown me onto the tree showed up again growling, I staggered to my feet and looked at them both, their humanity was gone even with a human body. "I only wanted you to be the one." I whispered weakly as I snapped my arm into place. "And for a little while he's enjoyed that power." A more dominant voice spoke behind Zakari, he was built like a tank, his whole body was rippling with muscle and it made me shudder at the sight of him, this was the wolf who Zakari had called upon to destroy and kill the pack, an alpha who could do the job and accept the reward.



"Oh Zakari, you sho—." I couldn't finish my pitiful statement as a partially shifted hand clawed its way through my brother's body, tore his heart out and his body was left to drop to the ground lifeless, I wasn't shocked by what was happening, I had felt it would happen the moment the alpha had spoken, my last blood relative had been a pawn in a very larger game.



"Poor Xavier, you couldn't save them, could you, you can sleep at night knowing your brother was the one who killed this pack and that I tore his heart out as mercy for his psychotic mind, now leave Xavier, you're now one of us, a rogue, we are the savages, see how you fare as one of us, and if ever I find you again, know that I will kill you." The alpha stated without an ounce of doubt or mercy, I knew his words were true, each one he spoke, so I became one with my wolf, shifted right then and ran, I had never seen myself in my wolf form but seeing the regret in letting me go by the alpha fueled my need to run, escape and survive as his pack wolves howled, hunting me.

~∆~∆~∆

My body jolted awake, I was panting heavily, that dream, that nightmare I tried to forget for so long, but how could I forget my own past, it was who I am and nomatter what I did or could do, there was no forgetting only accepting and moving on, so I threw my legs over the edge of the bed, the rays of sunlight gently carressed my skin making me sigh in peace, atleast the nightmares weren't as bad as before, I had been making progress, after so many years.


Walking into the bathroom I smiled to myself whilst looking at my own reflection, I was gaining weight, which meant harder exercise routines, I detested them but I needed them, my hair had grown past my shoulders and having a friend who could style it for free gave me the freedom to do whatever with it, it also got me several envious looks around town, I never saw what they saw though, only a regular me.



Being a wolf in hiding and also trying to live a normal life meant I had to keep myself away from the local wolf pack, ofcourse in my idiocy several years ago I had ran to a small town called Sandbury, thinking that because it was small no one would notice if I blended in, I did blend in ofcourse but the paranoia got to me, to a point where I just locked myself in my apartment, later on as the years went by, more and more people came to town, I got a great job finished school and got my degree, the less paranoid I was too, until I discovered them when they howled in the night, since then I've kept my distance but like any good wolf trying to blend in, I've kept my enemy close, which honestly has resulted in some entanglements I wish I could undo, but that's another story for a later time seeing as I only had an hour before I had to get to work at my antique slash jewellery store, my pride and joy.



Quickly showering then drowning myself in the scent hider, goddess I need a better name for that, I created with perfume and herbs so that the wolves couldn't pick up on my scent, I got ready even faster, combat boots and a denim jacket would do, I was my own boss yes, but my two employees needed a good example, I was that good example, once I was in the kitchen there was no time for breakfast so I grabbed my water, apple and milkshake for the road, the door autolocked behind me as I was in the garage unlocking my car, my other pride and joy.


It took ten years since that day to get where I was, I've been through a lot since than, but it made me the person I  am today and I couldn't be happier, so as I reversed onto the road and headed for the town centre I was smiling, life was good, and I knew I had to appreciate it, however long it lasted.

+++

T

his book is not edited, any errors grammatical or otherwise will be corrected in due course.


This story was rewritten, I'm tired of rants, and accusations about how I shouldn't have done so, I'm sorry, I did, I have no regrets, enjoy the book, thank you.

lmj

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