Chapter 21

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MYMY POV

Today made 5 months since I've been pregnant. This pregnancy has had its ups and downs but I push through every day. To see my progression and seeing my baby fight for its life has made me fight even harder. There's nothing I can't do, because there's nothing I wouldn't do for my baby.

Today was even more special because I was going to find out the gender of my baby. I was excited and nervous. What if I had a girl. Would I be able to handle her? I mean I was a good woman to look up to. I think.

I may have been having a boy, because my stomach was so big. Literally. As each day went by it grew bigger and bigger. I was happy because I remember fighting hard in the beginning of this pregnancy.

Chris and I had been having a little problems, and he sort of moved out, but I was really hoping he'd come. I knew he wouldn't miss the reveal of his kid.

I'm not sure why everything is going so wrong but I need this to be right. I can't imagine me with anyone else. I wanted him and no one else. He had my heart and I didn't plan on giving it to anyone else.

I'm sure he'd come. His whole family was coming, and I know he wouldn't let them down. That nigga mama would kill him if he didn't show up.

We've been communicating, but not as much as I'd like. When he moved it really pissed me off a lot. I thought everything was going good after him getting shot. I had been taking care of him, making sure he good so I can't understand why we're fighting.

Niggas really wasn't shit. I was busting my ass pregnant and all to make sure he was straight. Cleaning up after him, cooking for him, bathing him and the minute he got better I feel like he just up and left.

I don't know why my mind always went to cheating. He told me to not worry about another bitch. I told him I wasn't worried he should be the one worried. In all honesty I wasn't gone do nothing stupid.

I might beat a hoe up and him too but nothing else. I refused to go to jail and leave behind my little brother and my child. They need me more than anybody, and I need them more than they know.

Anyway, I'm not gone worry about if he's coming or not. If he do, he do. If he don't then I know what it is.

I had just got back home from the mall getting Ced and I a outfit. Ced said he was team boy and I was just team healthy. I was fighting hard to keep my baby, I really didn't care what it was.

As I sat on the couch my mind started to think about other shit. All I had on my mind was my mama and Aaliyah. Where the fuck were they? I haven't heard from them in so long. I worried about them a lot too.

Ced and I was in a much better place, we finally could enjoy life and a part of me wished they were enjoying life with us. I wasn't the person to come up and leave everybody behind. Even though they did some flaw shit to me I would never just say fuck them. I loved them.

I genuinely loved and cared for them. I just prayed they were safe. I wondered what they'd say about me being pregnant. My mama would probably lose her shit. She would've never expected it from me.

This just made me think of my dad. What would he have done. I'm sure with everything going on in my life now he'd been right next to me comforting me. I really missed him so much.

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