chapter 19: secrets

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(richies pov)
i should just throw it out! why was i so stupid to think that i could write a letter?? i shoved the paper into the bottom of my bag when i saw beverly looking at it. there's NO WAY i'm giving it to eddie. i like him, i really do...but i don't want people to spread rumors and shit about me. i mean yeah, derry is a small fucked up town...and even if bowers is locked away, there's ALWAYS going to be other homophobes. i'll just try to forget about the letter now and get through the school day. when i get home i'll figure out how to get rid of it.

"Hey, we were thinking about going to the quarry, are you in?" Beverly asked me.
"Um... yeah" I replied.

{time change}

(Beverlys pov)
i kept a close eye on richie all day, he's hiding something, i'm sure of it. i walked over to the usual spot i'm at and laid down my towel to lay on. the losers are talking but i'm not interested, there's something else i'm more focused on. i stares at richies school bag, cause we had walked here from school. what is he hiding??? and then it dawned on me. "holy shit. maybe he likes me???" i thought. i tried to suppress the smile that was slowly creeping into my face but of course, richie saw it.
"what the fuck are you laughing at?" he questioned.
"what? no- i wasn't- i wasn't laughing at you... i was... um... laughing at that frog?" i said in a panic.
"ok" was all richie said back.
ben jumped off into the water first this time with the rest of the losers following behind. i was the last to jump in. i stood up from my towel and hestitated walking towards the edge to jump off. i instead, turn around walking towards richies bag. "i feel like such a crappy friend for doing this, but what if something's really bothering him and he needs help?" i thought. so i reach my hand out and unzip his backpack. i look for the piece of paper in all of his folders and stuff. just then i find a crumpled piece of paper, i spread it out on a rock and it had tons of writing on it.
i start reading in my head,
"dear-"
"BEVERLY! ARE YOU COMING DOWN?" i hear ben shout from the water below.
i quickly stuff the paper into my own bag and walk towards the edge of the cliff.
"YEAH, I JUST HAD TO UH...DO SOMETHING REAL QUICK." i shout back.
the boys looked at each other, some with shocked looks and others with confused looks. probably making their own inferences about what i was doing. i didn't want to give it too much thought though...
i jump off the cliff and into the water.

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