kpop idol - me

chpt 57) daechwita release

may 22 2020

the past week or so has been insane.my sleeping schedule is off the walls crazy and all i do is recordings , meetings , contracts , deals , signings , fittings , photoshoots or interviews. i have had a maximum of three hours sleep in a day, if i am hopeful.

today is the release od yoongi hyungs new album.i sent him flowers and a gift early in the morning . but i didn't get to see him today because i had meetings with fila , Samsung and bt21 over the new merchandise lines.

my favourite songs are " daechwita" , "what do you think" and "strange".

they were musical masterpieces and if you look at the lyrics and meaning it has the equvilant of a ted talk in a 3 minute song.

the jungkook 'scandal' has died down a bit and he seemed to be less upset by it day by day.

meanwhile my 'scandal' was getting worse day by day and at some point i even had to turn off the comment section on my instagram.it wasn't that had a dating scandal. but people had decided to 'call me out' on dropping friends who decided to 'fall in love with me'.there was literally no evidence for it at all.

before 10% of comments were hateful. but now about 20% of comments were hateful and i began obsessing over reading them.its like tiktok , once you begin it doesn't end.

it also meant more and more commenters were getting sued.

it got so worse that every night i would cry myself to sleep or panic attacks became a daily thing.i didn't even know what to do.yet i didn't tell anyone and i thought that was smart.

may 29 2020

 yoongi hyungs album has been an international's success and i am so proud of him.

today i had a shit day though , a really shit day. the bts members had a photo shoot and i spent most of the day with the txt members in dance rehearsals or with the trainees in vocal training.

i was so tired when i arrived home.

i opened the door and saw serin unnie with yards of fabric.she was taking it up to her room for some course work.she had exams recently so i haven't seen her around much.

i went up to the gym and did some routines there before going for a swim and taking a shower. after i played with snow and began reading through comments and posts.