VULNERABLE | thomas shelby

✞ F I V E ✞

CHAPTER FIVE ; BETHS BREAKDOWN

JOHN BEGAN TO CURSE UNDER his breath when he walked into the Shelby's private room in the Garrison, only to find Beth's body shaking in her arms. Her knees were pulled to her chest and her arms wrapped around her body, holding her together as she cried. An empty bottle of rum sat on the table infront of her and her body shook with every sob that echoed around the private hut. Even as children, Beth was never prone to cry a lot but when she did, it was always a huge paroxysm of sadness.

John hadn't expected to find Beth to be curled up into herself in a drunk mess. She was usually put together, holding herself in high standards despite her bad reputation so to see her upset, he'd known something bad must have happened. Arthur had been stood behind him when John had flung the door open but once he'd seen Beth he quickly ushered Arthur out and instructed him to get Tommy. Arthur rushed off and John closed the door to the private room, huffing as he made his way toward Beth.

Beth glanced up at John, wiping her eyes quickly of the tears. "I'm sorry John." It was only a whisper as John moving to sit beside her, tugging her under his arm. "I just got drunk." John only grinned, placing his lips to the top of her head as he laughed. "Don't be apologising, I get drunk every day and I don't apologise!" Beth cracked a laugh, John himself smiling proudly. "There she is! I hate bloody seeing you upset. No doubt something my older brothers done. I always said it Beth, me and you should just get fucking married. Fuck Tommy."

"It's a bastard to be in love with the devil. I'd love to be in love with you John." Beth grinned, nudging his side. John looked down at her, his eyes full of worry. "What's he done then?" He asked, voice soft as if she'd crumble. "It wasn't him. Ada actually. She just said some things that I didn't want to hear." Her voice was small but John could only nod. "And this morning in Polly's, I was looking at the picture of us all in the snow. Me, you, Calvin, Arthur and Tommy. Do you remember that winter, John?"

"I do. Best winter I've ever had. When it snowed in France, it was all I could think of. We were all so happy to see the snow but over there, it wasn't as much of a blessing." His voice was hoarse, matching her quiet tone. Beth closed her eyes shut tight, attempting to stop the tears from slipping from her eyes. "I feel so selfish saying this because I know you lot have gone through so much and I really don't want to upset you ever more." Beth whispered, her voice cracking. "I miss Calvin so bloody much."

"I know doll. I know." John sighed, brushing his hand through her hair. "If anyone of us deserved to go it certainly wasn't Calvin." Beth could only grin at his words, staring up at him with a tear stained face and a smile. "He was the biggest prick on earth but god I miss him more than anything. Do you remember when he fell in the ice? God they were the times, weren't they John?" They both fell into a silence, the reminiscence of their childhood memories plaguing through their brain.

"Let's go get a bottle of rum, it's a night for it." John grinned, helping Beth to stand. Once they'd made their way into the Garrison, the booming pub quietened and Beth leaned against the counter. "A bottle of rum please." She called to the new barmaid who turned to stare at her with a glint in her eyes. "I can't serve someone who's already drunk." Beth burst into a fit of laughter turning to look at John who held a smile of his own. "I said a bottle of rum. I'm not asking."

"I can't serve somebody who's already drunk. You've had two bottles of rum already-." The pub fell silent as Beth banged on the counter, her eyes a blaze. "I didn't ask for a count of what I'd already drank. I said give me a bottle of rum, by order of the peaky fucking blinders!" John walked over to Beth's side, eyeing the new barmaid. "Our family gets served on the house. You'll only make this mistake the once." The barmaid refused to stand down, her eyes glaring. "I don't believe that I'm mistaken. I was told not to serve a woman at the counter and certainly not one who's drunk."