Teach Me How To Live -~Zen Wistaria x Reader~-

Long Day

Um hey, so I realized a long while ago that I've been spelling Izana like Izona but im too lazy to go back and change it, im sorry😂

Your POV

I woke up the next day rather early. I got dressed in a pair of pants and a shirt to keep warm. Dresses aren't really the warmest thing ever and besides, maybe dressing like i did in the past wouldn't make people notice me?.. Not sure but I wore my cloak as well with my hair stick too. I finally left my room early and went looking for Rue. I found him in the bunk room still passed out from yesterday so I wrote him a note saying where I'd be at. The training area. I hadnt trained for at least 6 months and being back in Clarines really makes me want to start up again. I was there in a big open space all morning swinging my sword around and trying to build up my strength again. Once the sun had risen, there were people. People like prince Izona...
"Y/n, youre here rather early" Izona called. He looks like he dressed up to have a practice fight with someone.. Probably me..
"Being back in Clarines gave me motivation to start training again" i said as i set my sword against the wall and took a sip of water.
"To start again? You stopped? I dont think I can believe you" he told me and was being oddly friendly.
"I hadnt trained at all in Tanbarun, I just have too much to do there" i told him and tried to straighten up a little.
"Yes, I've heard of your efforts. Lowering bills and making peace in the towns, is there anything you cant do?" He asked and held his sword up like he was asking for a fight so I picked mine up.
"Unfortunately, yes" i answered as he swung first but i blocked.
"Like what?" He asked as i attacked next.
"I cant seem to stop causing trouble and I cant seem to hurry along this stupid marriage interview!.." I said as the two of us fought hard against each other. I began to let out my emotions through this fight.
"Stupid?.. You dont want to marry Zen anymore?" He asked in visible confusion.
"Of course i still do! But every time we plan something it gets ruined or moved and there's nothing we can do! I just want to be with him without any restrictions or distance!" I shouted and was going all out. Izona became my source to vent physically and mentally. Hes more skilled then I thought with a sword..
"Then will you abandon your kingdom and run away back home? Is that what you want?" He asked and was intentionally trying to make me angrier just to see my fighting and I let him.
"No! Those are my people and I care deeply for all of them! I'll never completely abandon my kingdom even if it hurts me to stay!" I shouted but suddenly had my sword knocked out of my hands.. i really need to start training again..
"You're the perfect description of a princess, Y/n, like one you'd read about in silly fairytales. You care far too much about other people rather than yourself which is why you're so incredibly wreakless." He told me in such a mocking tone as he lowered his sword. "If you love Zen then you'd stay no matter what rules have been set in place" he said as if he was threatening me.
"Thats not how love works.." i sighed as i picked up my sword, "Our love grows stronger the longer we're apart and besides that, Zen and i have a commitment to our kingdoms. Whether we'd like to admit it or not, our people come first.." i told him as i sheathed my sword and looked him in the eyes.
We stared for a second before he cracked a smile then even started laughing! "Im sorry for laughing, I just didnt realize youd learn that so quickly" he laughed, "I needed to make sure your little love story wouldn't affect Clarines negatively or distract Zen from his work so you passed" he told me.. I passed?......
I hate this guy..
"Dont you think his work would have suffered all this time too?" I asked with a grumble as i watched him sheath his sword.
"His work is affected by your commitment to each other far more than you realize but at least he's getting it done and has some motivation for when you came back"
Izona sighed and wiped the sweat off his brow. "Oh and welcome back home, miss Moon" he addressed me like he would before I got this title.
"Congratulations on your marriage, highness" i gave a short bow in return. He chuckled before leaving me alone again. "I hate that guy sometimes.." i muttered to myself before sighing and relaxing.
"I do too" Zen said suddenly behind me. I jumped in my spot and felt my heart racing.
"I-I didnt mean it!" I stuttered quickly and looked behind me at Zen.
"I thought you knew I was here" Zen laughed as he walked to me.
"If I knew you were there than I wouldn't have said something stupid.." i sighed and placed my hand over my beating heart.
"Its okay, he is kind of a jerk sometimes but he means well" Zen told me before taking my hand with a smile. "Lets go walk for a while" he said and began to lead us down the sidewalk.
"That sounds nice.." i smiled and relaxed as i held his hand. His hand is so warm.. i missed this so much..
"I heard what you two were talking about and I knew of his plan to harass you but I couldn't say anything" he sighed and stayed close to my side.
"Its alright, im glad i passed whatever test he had for me though" i chuckled and looked at the melted snow under our feet as we walked in the path filled with salt.
"I knew you would so I wasnt worried." He said before suddenly kissing my cheek. I cant help but to feel flustered every time he does something random like this, I feel like im burning now!
"Mitsuhide told me something about your brothers bride.." I began and was trying to start this up.
"Oh yeah, something about Isabelle being two sided, right? He said the same thing to me too and im trying to look into it but theres not much I can do.." Zen said with a sigh.
"She was so sweet but Mitsuhide was terrified. He said she even got to Obi!" I exclaimed.
"What?" Zen asked in complete shock.
"I havent asked Obi yet but maybe we should look into her.." i wondered.
"Izona must know about her sides though.. It sounds wrong but he might be using Isabella like she's using him.." Zen explained and it totally made sense.
"Youre right.. What does he have to gain though? If he knows he's being used then there must be some reason he's going through all this trouble just to marry her" i asked and was really trying to think.
"Isabelle is the daughter of a noble known well for importing and exporting illegal drugs to Clarines. At least thats what has been said for generations. Izona is probably trying to figure out whats going on.." he thought.
"Drugs?.." i asked in quiet confusion. Like cigarettes..? Those are illegal?.. Maybe medicines?..
"Yes, they sell them at high prices and are illegal around Clarines but we haven't been able to find any evidence for as long as this has been happening" he explained. Drugs.. Like medicinal drugs?..
"Youre not allowed to make your own medicines in Clarines?.." i asked Zen in confusion. Why couldn't you?
"What?" He looked at me completely puzzled. Im so confused.. "Living in Alfin, you've never heard of drugs that weren't used for medicine?" Zen asked in complete shock.
"What else would you use it for?" I asked and was getting even more lost. Zen stopped in his place then suddenly looked so happy. "You're so innocent sometimes.." he told me and sounded happy about that.
"Wh-What? What'd i do?" I asked in complete confusion and took a step back. He thinks after all ive done and gone through, IM the innocent one?
"Nothing" he chuckled and began to walk with me again, "we should go inside soon for breakfast. You havent eaten yet, have you?" He asked smiling and took us to the door.
"No, I woke up and went to see how Rue was doing then went out here" i explained and quickly forgot about the whole innocent thing.
"Everyone else is already awake and up too" he told me as we walked to the room we always ate in.
"Thats good. I hope Rue doesn't have trouble finding me when he wakes up" i answered with a smile.
"He'll find us again, dont worry" Zen chuckled as we came up to the door but stopped when we heard shouting.
"Commoners and servants eating with royals? How disgusting!" Isabelle.. Thats her voice but I've never heard her talk this way.. "Youre not their friends, you serve them, end of story so do not think you're something special." She growled. Zen looked like he was about to crack but I stopped him by squeezing his hand a little.
"We're sorry, lady Isabelle. This is normally how we go about our days with prince Zen and princess Y/n." Kiki answered softly.
"I didnt ask for you to talk, girl." Isabelle spat. "As for you, you aren't even an attendant. What business do you have here?" She asked.
"I-Im sorry, ma'am. Since the princess has been back we've been eager to spend the most time as we can with her.." Shirayuki asnwered almost too softly for anyone to hear.
"People like you dont deserve to be in her presence. Leave so that I may have a time alone with them" Isabelle commanded.
"Hurry!.." i whispered to Zen and ran far down the hall to another room and hid us there.
"Why do we have to hide in a closet?.." Zen whispered. We are pressed together rather tightly but we have to keep this a secret.
"Dont let the others know we know whats happening. Until things get out of hand we'll stay quiet because this is was Izona wants" i whispered to him. My boobs feel so compressed against his chest that im actually in pain.. in a way this sucks but others, it's kinda nice being close.
"Fine but if she lays a finger on any of them I won't stay quiet" he whispered as we listened for safety. The others went the opposite direction of us so we were good to come out.
"Lets go in there and talk to her like we know nothing" i told Zen as i took down my hood. I bet she'll hate the way im dressing because im supposed to be this perfect princess but im wearing trousers. Zen nodded before knocking on the door.
"We're coming in" he said as he opened the door.
"Prince Zen, princess Y/n, good morning" Isabelle sat at the head of the table smiling.
"Good moring, miss" i smiled and put on my own act. "Do you know where the others went? We were supposed to be eating with them" i asked as Zen and i slowly walked to the table and took a seat on either side.
"You were? I hope it wasn't important, I sent them away so just us could talk about things" she smiled innocently.
"I see.." Zen answered and didnt seem too happy so i lightly tapped his foot with mine under the table to remind him to keep up the act.
"Is there anything specific you wanted to talk about or did you just want to hang out for a while?" I asked and tried to eat but i felt so uncomfortable. Why is she sitting at the head of the table? Nobody does that when there's only 3 people! Especially if you're the only one without a royal status!
"I wanted to hear about the both of you. It must be hard being apart for so long" Isabelle began. Zen almost choked once he heard Isabelle start off with that. Is she going to try and get between us somehow?.. Is that why she's trying to spend time with us?
"We actually visited Tanbarun for Y/n's birthday in October and write letters frequently" Zen answered after getting a grip.
"Oh, i see. Rumors about the two of you have gone on for longer than you announced your title, havent they? You were only his sentinel yet the two of you continued to be by each others side.." she said with a smile, "something like that should have never been allowed but now you have a royal status to protect your relationship" she told me and sounded nice but was saying mean things.
"Yes, i do.." i answered quietly.
"It would be such a shame if your love faded away because of something like a title but even before, you were Y/n Moon, the last of the ruthless Moon clan" she went on. Zen looks like he's going to say something so i taped his foot again to keep him down.
"You must have been there, weren't you?" I asked her with a smile.
"Pardon?.." she asked in confusion.
"On our missions. Surely you only know how truly rutless and murderous we are if you saw us." I asked with a smile and put on my own act. Maybe if i scare her then this conversation will end.
"Murderous? I-I never said that-" she stuttered.
"No, it's alright. That is the first thing that's on everyone's mind when they think of me. How much blood is one her hands? Who knows" i shrugged and continued to eat. I looked up at Zen with a little grin at how well I was stopping Isabelle but he doesnt look happy about what i said.
"Of course not, princess. You were given your orders or would take the consequences.. Im sorry about your family.." she said.
"Dont apologize for something you can't control." I told her, "and besides, not all of them are dead anyway.." i grinned to myself Zen cleared his throat and kicked my leg under the table once he heard that.
"Oh, its fine. You're a trustworthy woman, right Isabelle? You wouldn't tell anyone about my family's secret, would you?" I asked and put her on the spot. If she thinks she can fool me than she's got another thing coming. I know she'll give away my secret, I just want to know who she'd tell.
"O-Of course not princess! But i thought everyone passed away, the graves are-" she asked quickly and seemed a little nervous now.
"Empty." I grinned and had my eyes on my fork. "You think a fool like Dominic could take us all out?" I asked and looked at her in the eyes. Shes scared of me now.. Good, I could use this to my advantage.
"No, I guess not.." she said as she lowered her head. Maybe i went a little overboard..
"Y/n, is there something specific you wanted to do today?.." Zen asked just to clear the air.
"Do you have paperwork to do?" I asked smiling and looked up to him. His worry seemed to fade away after seeing my smile.
"Paperwork can be put on hold for a few hours" he chuckled.
"You and I both know that can't happen. Mitsuhide and Kiki will drag you right back to it" i giggled.
"Y/n, you could help me choose flowers for my wedding if you'd like?" Isabelle asked with a sudden smile.
"Youd be better off choosing flowers then sitting at the windowsill all day" Zen chuckled to me.
"Id love to help you, isabelle but I can't promise to give you all my time today. When will we be looking?" I asked her.
"Ill come find you later today" she said as she put down her silverware and stood up. "Please excuse me but I must go now" she said before bowing and leaving. After she shut the door she stopped for a minute before leaving.
"I didnt like the way you were trying to scare her." Zen suddenly grumbled and stood up.
"Wh-What? But it worked!" I shouted and stood up smiling. I know he doesn't like it when i talk bad about my past.
"Youre not murderous.." he said as he looked out the window. "Youre the most gentle and caring person I've ever met.. You dont deserve to be talked down on by anyone, even yourself.." he said as he slowly looked back to my eyes.
"I-Im sorry.." i whisperered feeling a little ping to my heart.
Zen sighed before smiling, "lets go find the others now before they get worried" he told me as he walked around the table then took my hand again.
"I thought we couldn't look like a couple in front of people.." i muttered but didnt let go of his hand.
"We're not but I don't care" he told me happily.
After leaving, we quickly met up with the others. They were all quiet and didnt tell us about what isabelle said to them out of fear but we knew. Rue was there as well, everyone is in Zen's office.
"So.. How was breakfast with the future queen?" Obi asled and tried to play things off.
"Normal" Zen said without any tone.
"Pfft-.." i laughed when I thought back to how scared isabelle got.
"Something happen, princess?.." Rue asked curioisly.
"Oh no, just scaring the socks off isabelle is all" i grinned happily.
"I thought we weren't gonna talk about that!.." Zen whispered to me.
"Oh, now tou have to tell us" shirayuki giggled.
"She was getting too personal.. Y/n took things a step too far.." Zen answered and still looked mad.
"Uh oh, that doesn't sound good" Obi said while grinning at the look Zen had.
"She called my family ruthless so I called us murderous and she stopped talking real quickly" i smirked all proud of myself.
"You and I both know thats not true.." Obi deadpanned at me.
"She wants the truth, i just stretched it a little" i shrugged happily.
"You and your father prove that statement wrong. You couldn't hurt a fly unless you had to.." Zen muttered while looking at paper work. I smiled a little a felt happy about what he said. He is right, we've never wanted to do such a thing but we were considered murderous because we did it anyway.. We did what we were told..
"Zen's right but you saying such a thing is a little put of character for you" Kiki said and looked in thought.
"She was out of character too- ach!- hey!" I shouted after Zen kicked my shin.
"Hey Y/n, aren't you gonna get in trouble for not wearing a dress?.." Shirayuki asked and pointed to my trousers.
"Who's gonna stop me? My father?" I smirked and put my hands on my hips.
"While you're in public you still need to look professional, princess. You cannot do what you please now that youre away from home-" Rue started. Oh great, he's gonna give me a speech.. "You cannot get so comfortable in another kingdom. You must wear suitable clothing and act appropriately or else-" Rue just kept going so I sighed and took his advice. I left the room without a word all while Rue kept giving me this dumb speech. He walked me all the way to my room talking about my status and junk and I'm so annyoed..
"Rue, im gonna need you to stop giving me a hard time while I'm home" I sighed before shutting the door and went to the trunk i brought from tanbarun. I snuck in some of my old dresses thankfully so I put on one of the less fancy ones before walking back out and finding Rue at ease outside my door. "Rue, do you remember how big of a mess you were yesterday?" I asked as we walked back to Zen's office.
"Excuse me for anything I did while intoxicated. It will not happen again" he told me and walked a little behind me.
"Yes well, you have a big mouth when your mind isn't clouded with worry" i grinned and looked back to him. "You embarrassed the hell out of me at one point so we had a fight with swords outside. You lost and thought you had also lost your job. It was pretty funny" i giggled.
"Im sorry for my rudeness" he sighed at himself and sounded embarrassed.
"Dont you worry, we all got to see what you were like if you treated us like your friend anyway so it was worth it. Obi got a good laugh in too" i told him happily before we walked back into Zen's office.
"Princess! There you are!" Isabelle suddenly shouted just as i opened the door.
"O-Oh, hello isabelle. Is it time to pick flowers already?" I asked in surprise and looked around a little. Zen seems fine but the others are quiet and are trying to look as professional as they can.
"Yes! I heard you loved being in gardens too so I know you'll be a big help, lets go!" She told me happily and took my hand.
"O-Oh, okay uh, Zen, ill be back soon!" I shouted as i was being dragged away.
"Keep an eye on her for us, Rue!" Zen shouted at the door. Rue bowed before shutting the door but Obi burst out just a second after.
"Princess, you dont mind if I accompany you as well, do you?" Obi asked with a smile and walked by Rue's side.
"I was hoping we could just have time between the two of us.." Isabelle told me.
"They wont be near us so don't worry" i told her with a smile, "keep your distance if you're coming along, Obi, Rue" i said and kept getting tugged along. She has quite a lot of strength in that tiny body. "Is there a specific flower you were looking for? What will the wedding look like?" I asked Isabelle and tried to forget all the stuff that happened earlier.
"Grand and elegant! We want it to look perfect especially if Izona is going to be king quickly following the wedding" she explained to me.
"Oh, I see.. When is his coronation? Will he be crowned in January?" I asked in wonder. That makes sense as to why mine and Zen's meeting will be pushed back.
"Yes, early January. The sooner hes crowned, the sooner you and Zen can be together" she smiled and pulled me into this big room absolutely stuffed with different flowers. It was beautiful but so organized. There was 3 long, long tables with a ton of different type of flowers.
"I think im more worried about Izona. He must be under a lot of stress and although I'd like to be with Zen, we dont mind holding off for longer" i explained quietly so no one else could hear. Obi asked the maids to leave and all other people so me and Isabelle could talk privately about what we wanted. Obi even shut the doors. Rue stood outside the door while Obi stayed inside and stood quietly.
"You both are very kind. That's a rare thing for royals these days" she sighed to me as we walked slowly down the first table.
"Thats what we've been told" i sighed after hearing that for the millionth time.
"Whats wrong?" She asked worriedly.
"Its nothing, it just feels wrong to be called kind when all we do is talk to others like normal people. Social status has nothing to do with being a good person" i told her and meant it fully.
"Power tends to change people.." Isabelle said as she picked up a daisy from the table.
"Some royals cannot help it though" i told her with a short smile as i looked at one of the quilting daisy's. "When i took my siblings to town for the first time they were terrified of the towns people. They didn't grow up around them, they didn't think they fit in" i began explaining as she listened, "and they didnt fit it. I've never fit in with those people either but its not our faults. Everyone is raised differently which makes everyone unique and sometimes they don't always come out humble or exactly nice but they don't realize it because that's how they were raised" i told her as i moved onto the next bunch of flowers.
"Then how did Zen come out so nice? Why isn't he like the others? Why did he accept you, a runaway, over nobles or royals?" She asked but i don't think she meant any harm. Im not a runaway though, I mean, yes I ran but it was to save my life not to rebel.
"Because Zen grew up with Mitsuhide. Mitsuhide is kind and caring and always worries for Zen which is why Zen became all those things but it also has to do with Zen's own experiences" i said softly as i looked at the little blooming buds. "Zen had a friend when he was little who was by his side for as long as he could. Everyone has different experiences which shapes their personalities" i told her happily.
"Pardon my rudeness but you were trapped all your life under Dominic's reign. You have many scars peeking out from your clothing, you grew up with scarry missions and you were almost killed by his hands.. Why did you turn out this way?" She asked and sounded genuine. Her tone has completely changed and her whole demeanor changed as well.
"Because of my family and friends and the hobbies I picked up along the way." I smiled and bumped her arm with mine. "My friends have really shaped me into the person I am now and its probably only been about a year since we've came together. Not to mention my hobbies included blacksmithing and medical care" i softly laughed as i found a beautiful blue flower that caught my eye. It looks like the one hanging on the handle of my sword..
"Medical?.." she asked in shock.
"Yes, believe it or not, im a trained doctor but i dont have a certificate for it so technically I shouldnt be doing medical stuff but im still trained for it" i laughed as i picked up the small flower. They're so little and beginning to bud.
"Thats amazing.. who knew?" Isabelle smiled as i moved on from those flowers to the next.
"No one apparently" i giggled, "i can also make pain medication but anything else is beyond me, youd need to find shirayuki for that" i told her happily.
"The red headed woman in the pharmacy?" She asked.
"Thats her. She was the firsr person I met after leaving alfin. She was my first friend after Obi" i explained while looking over to him.
"Wh-What? That boy is your friend?" Isabelle asked in shock.
"Hes my best friend! We grew up in Alfin together" i told her happily, "i even heard he got engaged to shirayuki!" I shouted while staring at him. He turned bright red but didn't move from his post. "He hates it when i tease him" i giggled and moved on with isabelle.
"I suppose they do make a good match.." she nodded, "You and rpince Zen aren't offically enged yet, huh?" she asked with a small smile.
"Unoffically or offically.." i sighed to myself.
"What? Really?" She asked and looked overly surprised, "but you two are so close that I thought-" she began but I stopped her.
"I know.. We always talk about getting married and we're already thinking about preparations but he hasn't exactly proposed.." i muttered and folded my hands together in front of me.
"Why not?.." she asked softly.
"Id like to think that hes waiting for some big deal of a proposal but I think id like it more if we were alone together. The day i was leaving we were with each other at sunrise alone and he said that one day hed use the proper words to ask for his hand but he asked me to wait so I am" i told her and felt so happy thinking back to that morning. A promise to promise..
"Thats so sweet.." Isabelle smiled and picked up a smile white flower.
"Now back to the flowers. What if you did white and gold and maybe a little pink?" I asked as i looked around us.
We quickly got back on topic about flowers. She finally figured out what she wanted then wrote it down. After that she took me to lunch with her. Not that its bad, i just really wanted to be with Zen.. We spent quite a long time eating then she even took me to the library.. I spent my entire day with Isabelle and she absolutely wore me out. It was late in the afternoon before Mitsuhide found me and told me Zen needed to see me. I finally got away from Isabelle for the day and went with Mitsuhide.
"Thank you so much for finding me" i whispered to Mitsuhide as we walked away with Rue and Obi following.
"What did she make you do? I thought you were just looking at flower arrangements?" Mitsuhide asked in wonder.
"It seemed like lady Isabelle was intentionally finding ways to pull you from Prince Zen" Rue explained.
"Yeah but why?.." Obi continued in thought.
"Dont think too hard about it. She just wanted my time for today, tomorrow ill stay with you guy even if she really wants to hang out" i said to them. I can't tell them Zen and i know what she's trying to do so ill have to play the peace maker.
"We're back" Mitsuhide knocked before opening the door. Only Zen and Kiki are here though.
"Is shirayuki off work? Obi, do you want to go find her?" I asked with a smile as we all entered.
"My pleasure, princess" he bowed before marching right back out happliy.
"How was your day with Isabelle?" Zen asked with a smile as he put down his pen.
"Being with her makes me think she's always had a ton of attention or none at all" i explained with a sigh as i went right to my seat at Zen's windowsill.
"Really? It was thay bad?" Kiki chuckled as i relaxed.
"Horrible." Rue said plainly as i quietly giggled.
"We looked at flowers, had lunch then went to the library. She talks a lot" i said with a short laugh.
"So do you to be fair" Mitsuhide chuckled to me.
"I like to think I talk at a normal pace" i crossed my arms and looked away with a little grin.
"You didnt scare her again, did you?" Zen asked as he stood up from his chair and stretched.
"No, I was being nice" I giggled.
"Rue, is that true?" Zen asked Rue for reassurance.
"Yes, highness. She was well mannered and behaved" Rue answered stiffly.
"Good" Zen chuckled in return and sat next to me on the windowsill. "Im glad youre back.." he whispered as he gently set his forehead on my shoulder.
"Zen's had a long day as well" Kiki said as she placed a few books back on the shelves.
"Lord Haruka stopped by to see you, Y/n but you werent here so instead he questioned Zen about the rumors of your marriage" Mitsuhide said with an apologetic smile towards Zen but he still hadn't looked up from my shoulder.
"I see.." i muttered before slowly turning to Zen and wrapping my arms around him. Zen must be more stressed than anyone, I just want to share the weight with him.. "You did have a long day then.." i sighed as i looked at his white hair. His head is still down and he shut his eyes. "Is there anything we can do to make you feel better?" I asked smiling.
"You already are.." he muttered as he looked back up to me with a soft smile.
"Then dont look so sad" i giggled as he slowly sat up again but took my hand just to hold.
"Im not" Zen rolled his eyes while the rest of us softly laughed.
Soon enough we had Shirayuki and Obi back with us. We went to have dinner together too and talked the whole time about the little stuff I missed while I was away. I told them about the things that went on in Tanbarun even if it wasnt a big thing. We stayed there and talked and messed around all night before we had to go to our rooms for the night because it was getting too late.
Hopefully tomorrow is a better day.