Caught in a Chase

56 - Revival

Two days had passed since our showdown in the bedroom. Chelsea didn't leave, but we hadn't talked about us either. We kissed, but hadn't fucked. I didn't know where things stood and it was driving me crazy. I'd tried to give her space but I had to know.

I found Chelsea in her favourite spot, staring out the window at the back garden as the sun set.

"Whatcha doing?" I asked, sitting down beside her.

"Thinking."

"Bout us?"

Chelsea turned to look at me. "Yes."

Looking down at my hands, I nervously interlaced my fingers. "And?"

"My mind is telling me to do one thing, my heart another," she sighed.

I knew which favoured me.

"The expression's 'follow your heart' for a reason," I said hopefully. "Nobody says follow your mind."

"My mind is trying to figure out how to never wind up here again. You spent months worried about losing me and you never said a word."

"I was -"

"Nope," Chelsea held up a hand, stopping me. "My turn to talk."

I shut up and waited for her to continue.

"So much would never have happened if you'd just talked to me about what was going on with you."

I nodded.

"But I can't make you share how you're really feeling. So there's no guarantee this isn't going to happen again," Chelsea said.

I reached over and picked up the tv remote from the coffee table. "I have the remote so it's my turn to talk, okay?"

She smiled. "I got the conch, said Piggy. You let me speak!"

"What? Ya calling me a pig?"

"Sorry, no. It's a quote from the book 'Lord of the Flies.' Never mind," Chelsea motioned for me to continue.

"Right. Okay. I don't wanna wind up back here either. So whatever I gotta do if it means we aren't over," I said, passing her the remote. "Your turn."

"The other issue..." Chelsea looked away.

"The girl, fuck – "

Chelsea waved the remote and I fell silent.

"I can sort of see where you're coming from, if you thought we were done. Even so Marshall, it wasn't a day before you were sticking your dick in someone else!"

She looked away as tears shone in her eyes.

"And I have that visual burned in my mind," she shook her head. "I mean, how would you feel if you saw some random guy eating me out?"

Instantly my jaw clenched and my hands balled into fists. Even the thought of someone else touching her had me livid. I would fucking kill him if I actually saw it.

She handed me the tv remote.

"I am so fucking sorry. I'd take back that moment if I could. It wasn't even good –"

Chelsea glared at me.

"Uh, what I mean is... I wish I'd never done it. I hate that I hurt you."

"And what about the other girl?"

"What other girl?" I asked, confused.

"The one constantly calling and texting you earlier this week," Chelsea said. "You got over me pretty fast and onto the next."

Fuck. I'd hoped Chelsea was too upset to notice Ivy blowing up my phone.

"Denaun pushed me into a date with her," I sighed. "That shit about getting under someone new."

"You slept with her," Chelsea said looking away.

"No!" I said. "No, I didn't. I swear."

Chelsea turned back towards me.

"I went to her place for dinner," I said and hesitated, before being honest. "We kissed a bit. She wanted more but all I could think about was you. So I told her no and left."

"That's it?"

I nodded. "We texted after that. I think she was waiting for me to change my mind. Then she guessed you were back, went crazy and I blocked her."

Chelsea stared out the window.

"There's no getting over you, Chelsea. Not for me. I love you."

"I love you too. But I don't know how to move past this still feeling hurt and insecure," Chelsea sighed. "And how do I trust you again? Especially when you have women throwing themselves at you constantly."

"I don't want you to feel like that," I said, reaching out and stroking her hair.

"Well, that's how ... the dick incident makes me feel. That and furious. Beating your head in furious. Both of them."

"I get the picture," I said. "If you tell me when you're feeling insecure, I will do everything I can to reassure you. Until you know you never have to doubt me again."

"You're okay with me being needy for awhile?" she asked.

"Absolutely. I look forward to reassuring you," I nodded. "Over and over again."

Chelsea rolled her eyes. "It's not a free pass for sex!"

"Of course not," I said. "I'd never be so insensitive to think that."

She tried to hide her smile and shook her head.

"Seems like we kinda got the same problem," I said. "Feeling insecure."

"The only way I know through that is being honest and talking about it," Chelsea said. "Is that something you think you can do?"

I thought over the question for a moment. Could I lay bare all my insecurities, feelings and fucked up thoughts to Chelsea, trusting she wouldn't use them against me?

"It won't be easy and I doubt I'll be good at it. But I promise to try every single day if that's what it takes to be with you again," I said.

Chelsea turned back to stare out the window. The sun had set now, it was dark out.

"So ... ?" I asked, unable to handle the silence any longer.

Chelsea took a deep breath and looked at me. "Okay. Let's give it another try."

I leaned forward to kiss her but she held up a hand stopping me.

"Fair warning though – if you ever cheat on me again, I swear to God I will end your sex life for good and that will be the last time you ever see me. No more chances."

"Got it," I nodded, kinda turned on. "Can I kiss you now?"

"Yes," she smiled.

I ran a hand behind her head and pulled her to me. When we broke apart for air, I realized there was another issue to sort out.

"Uh, there is one more thing..." I said, thinking of the box upstairs in my dresser.

"No," Chelsea shook her head. "Let's see how things go. And if someday, you still wanna ask ..."

If I still wanted to make her mine forever? That was never going to change, but I agreed to hold off.

We had a late dinner, after which I had some phone calls to return. I hung up and saw several new texts from an unknown number. Frowning I read them.

     ?: I know u still think about me. We had such a good time!

     ?: Come on babe I miss u!

I thought I knew who the texts were from, but wanted to be sure. Typing quickly I replied.

     M: Don't know who this is so don't care

I hit send and waited. In seconds I had confirmation.

     ?: It's Ivy! Why don't u come over right now?

     ?: We can lay in bed and u can show me how u really feel about me

"Not a fucking chance in hell," I muttered.

Crazy bitch was texting me from someone else's number. I blocked that one too and deleted the texts. No way was I looking at another woman now that I had Chelsea back.

Heading up to bed, I stopped in the doorway of the bedroom. Chelsea was changing into pajamas. My dick was instantly hard. It had been more than three months since we'd had sex. Not counting the single time after the shooting when she couldn't face me.

We were back together now ... But maybe she wasn't ready for sex yet?

I slipped into bed beside her and she curled into my side, resting her head on my chest. Running a hand through her hair, I kissed her forehead.

"I meant what I said before. This dick is yours baby. Only yours."

"Good. Because I meant what I said before too. I will end you if it's not," she mumbled already half asleep.

I grinned. I'd missed her smart mouth.

She was mine again. That was enough. I didn't need in her pants right away. I'd let her make the first move when she was ready.

The next morning I was just hanging up with Porter when Chelsea walked into the kitchen.

"You're up early," she yawned, reaching for the coffee pot.

"Yup," I dumped my cereal bowl in the sink. "Got a track that needs to be finished for a compilation album due tomorrow. Denaun's meeting me at the studio."

I saw Chelsea flinch and knew instantly what she was thinking about. Leaning back against the counter I watched her.

"Anything you wanna say?" I asked.

"Not really..."

"Thought we were gonna talk about how we felt from now on," I said.

Chelsea shrugged, looking down into her mug. "I'm not use to feeling insecure. Don't really know what to say."

"Fair enough," I nodded and thought about the questions I'd have in her position.

"Yes she worked there. No she doesn't anymore. I had her fired. On her best day, she couldn't compare to you on your worst day. And I'm not dumb enough to ever make that mistake again, whether at the studio, backstage, at a radio station ... fuck, anywhere."

I wrapped my arms around Chelsea, pulling her against me in a tight hug. "Did I cover everything?"

"That was pretty good," Chelsea mumbled into my chest. "Thank you."

"I fucked up. But never again," I whispered and her arms tightened around me.

I tilted her head up and kissed her. After a minute she broke away with a groan.

"Okay, go!" she smiled, pushing me away. "Before I drag you back to bed."

As she turned to grab her coffee, I smacked her ass hard enough to make her jump.

"Fine. But I'll be back for that ass," I grinned.

"Promise?" she laughed.

"Count on it," I said, holding her gaze until she nodded.