When I woke in the morning, the bathroom door was shut, so I assumed that Cara was showering.
Sitting up in bed, I glanced at my arms.
Strange; I didn't feel the same pain as before - instead, it was duller and didn't smart as much when I moved. I was healing, inside and out, I thought with a smile.
I played with the duvet between my fingers as my eyes shut and I dozed. God, I was tired.
When I woke, I noted it had been only ten minutes, and I could still hear the shower blasting powerfully.
Laying back down, I tucked one hand beneath the pillow and lay down my head.
I closed my eyes and thought about the last-nearly-fortnight.
A lot had happened and yet here I was, still the same girl, a little more radiant, a little less needy of self assurance.
I was happy; something I never thought I would have, or even deserved.
I imagined my journey had been like planting a seed - the root of the problem was my sad, and when I left home, I began to grow, confident.
It often startled me when thought about dad and what I'd be doing if I was still home.
I was on the precipice of falling, plummeting into a deeper, ominous part of my psyche, immiscible to the happiness I was experiencing now.
Happiness tasted so much better, and I wore it like makeup on my face.
I stared at the white ceiling, vaguely hearing the bathroom door click open.
Would dad be okay?
The slightest amount of guilt struck me - dad needed help much more than I did, and while I was selfishly enjoying these new luxuries, dad would be going out of his mind.
I should phone the authorities, get him into a place where he wouldn't cause any more harm.
The honest truth was, I enjoyed having some things revolve around me. I liked being detached from my past and focusing on myself and who I wanted to be.
'Don't you think you're being selfish?' My subconscious taunted, and I sighed.
There were people who had much more than I did, so why shouldn't I celebrate being able to sleep safely and have clean clothes?
I ignored the irrational side of me.
For now, I was in a safer place.
I had a friend, I think, the food was pretty damn good, and One Direction were staying in the suite a few floors up.
What else did I need?
***
Cara and I were stood opposite each other in the breakfast buffet; I'd piled my plate up with pancakes, grapes and a bowl of yoghurt.
I eyed a blueberry muffin greedily and grabbed it with no preamble.
"Olivia! There'll be no food for the guests if you keep piling food on your plate!" Cara complained as I poured myself a glass of water.
We walked over to a table and sat parallel from each other; me with my full plate and Cara with a bowl of cereal and apple.
"I'm hungry." I muttered petulantly, slicing up a pancake and chewing it happily.
I could get used to this, I thought smugly.
Cara snorted and returned her gaze to her bowl.
As I looked up, there was a loud clutter of plates and an annoyed grunt, "No!"
I searched for the source of the noise, and my eyes closed in on Louis.
He'd dropped a stack of plates at the same time as Harry walked into Zayn and fell over.
I scoffed, running my hands through my hair in exasperation as the clean, grand hotel buffet was overturned in a state of anarchy.
Cara inhaled sharply and her eyes lit up with amusement as she watched the havoc unfold before our very eyes.
I rose from my seat and rushed over to them.
"What have you done?!" I complained, bending to pick up large pieces of shattered porcelain. These plates must have cost a lot, I thought in shock.
I watched as Louis picked up the plate he wanted successfully, seemingly oblivious to the scene he'd caused.
Fortunately, there were no other guests; most of them had ordered room service or had breakfast earlier.
"I'm so sorry," Louis said honestly.
I frowned, "Just...go find a seat while I clear this up please."
Liam offered to help me, and together we sweeped up the mess in no time at all.
"What are your plans for today?" I asked Liam as he studiously scattered the dirt from the brush and pan into the bin.
"We're doing a photoshoot for our 2013 calendar." He smiled and I nodded.
"Sounds like fun." I responded.
As I stood in the lobby, chatting to one of the staff, Tommy, I saw Niall and smiled at him.
I didn't think he noticed until I saw him beam at me.
I excused myself from my conversation with Tommy and walked over to Niall who was standing by the hotel doors.
"Bye Niall, have fun today!"
"Thanks Olivia, catch you later!" He grinned, startling me by wrapping me in his arms.
I stiffened at the contact; a horrible chill ran down my spine.
I tried to shake off the tears springing to my eyes, but he noticed and released me. "What's wrong? Did I say something?" He frowned.
"No, no. Just got some dust in my eye." I smiled and he grinned.
"I'll catch you later then. Bye, Olivia." He reached for his bag on the floor and I looked out of the door.
Lights began to flash in my face as he opened the door and I squinted.
I noticed all the cameras, and I immediately began to feel claustrophobic.
All manners of questions were shouted by paparazzis trying to be heard;
"Niall, who's she?"
"Is she a girlfriend?"
"Friends with benefits?"
I gasped, my mouth hanging open at their audacity. Is this really what it was like for Niall day to day?
Niall tried to shield me as Paul ushered me to the side. I smiled weakly, thanking him, but my head was throbbing.
I could see the remaining, high intensity light of the cameras whenever I blinked.
I sat down on one of the red leather seats, rubbing circles on my temples, surprised by a painful tension in my head.
Everything infront of me blurred.
I felt my weight drop as my body hit the ground.
Everything became black.
