♛Chptr. 21 || ☆☆The Water's Getting Colder, Let Me in Your Ocean, Swim☆☆♛

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Prepare your tissues (╥︣﹏╥)
I hate myself.


ᴺᵒʷ ᵖˡᵃʸᶦⁿᵍ; [Swim]
0:42 ──o───────── -3:47
⇄ ◃◃ Ⅱ ▹▹ ↻
ᴠᴏʟᴜᴍᴇ : ▮▮▮▮▮▮▯▯▯

ᴺᵒʷ ᵖˡᵃʸᶦⁿᵍ; [Swim]0:42 ──o───────── -3:47⇄ ◃◃ Ⅱ ▹▹ ↻ᴠᴏʟᴜᴍᴇ : ▮▮▮▮▮▮▯▯▯

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☆☆The Water's Getting Colder, Let Me in Your Ocean, Swim☆☆












It was one of those nights when Jungkook couldn't find the desire to sleep yet. 

He's been out with Jimin in the early hours of the morning until night and his body feels tired; yet his mind seemed to still be occupied. His thoughts were running at full speed and all he could do was run but still fail to reach it.

He hadn't been in this state for a while now so he wonders why his tendency to overthink overflows once again. He's been trying to get past this sort of phase yet he's finding himself returning back where the marks of his scathed previous steps were still visible.

He might be aware of the reason why. But he doesn't really want to acknowledge it. Not anymore. Or at least not yet. 

He's still just healing, forgetting the pain, and trying to crawl up from the slump he's been in before. He's not ready to indulge himself in another wretched maze of unwarrented pain and self-loathe just because he lets someone takes a piece of himself again only to regret it at the very last minute. 

Feelings. . . emotions. . . affection and desire. 

They're all the same. 

All they do is fuck you up.

With a puff of his cigarette, he inhales the stick that was trapped between his fingers. He tilts his head up to rest it on the pavement, his bare back touching the cold tiles at that corner as he let his arms stay lax on the side of the pool. 

Exhaling the smoke from his lips, he watched it get mixed in the night breeze until it disappears and he takes another puff. Staring at the starless boring sky, he lets himself get drowned in the feeling of emptiness, a usual occurrence in his dreary and repetitive life. 

He closed his eyes as he breathes another smoke out, just listening to the chlorinated water waving at his little movements. It was too quiet that sometimes he wished for something chaotic to happen just to get reminded that he's still living in a world where loneliness doesn't reign in. How nice would that be?

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