Chapter 19

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I was sulking

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I was sulking. In my room. I took a few days off work. I was not sure if I could even go into work again. Not after nearly dying. And Michael saving my life.

Every time I managed to fall asleep his voice kept ringing in my head. "Do everything you said you were going to do with your life!" How could I do everything? When the love of my life was gone?

Not only that everything happened so fast I never got a real chance to tell him how I felt for him. I did love him.

Now he died thinking I did not love him back. Tears fall down my cheek as my head rests on my tear stained soaked pillow. Depression was not my friend. Here I used love my job. I was excited to go into work. From discovering my powers.

To meeting Michael in the most magical way. The first time we could kiss. To the first time I got to see him smile at me.

Everything about him oozed magic. There was never going to be another for me. There was never going to be another Michael. More tears fall. I do not bother to grab a tissue from the box. I had emptied it out. There were tissues all over the floor.

"Do you want to talk?" mom asks me. "Johnny came by. He was worried and he brought you soup. I told everyone you got sick from falling in the cold pool. I covered for you dear"

Mom sits beside me on the bed. I still say nothing more. I hug my pillow to my chest. Mom rubs my back. "I know it seems like the end of the world. But this was all for the best" she tries to tell me.

"Mom you do not understand. He did not have to cross over yet. He had for me! He lost his life for me. He gave it all up for me. So that I could live! This is all my fault" I sob.

"He should not have been there. He knows he should have crossed over long ago" warns mom. "Yes, he had done a noble thing. But you two could have never been. He was not for you. Your love is out there. He is alive" mom tells me.

"Mom don't do that. There is love even after death" I tell her. "Just because dad died does not give you the right to be down on love in the afterlife" I snap at her.

"I am going to go. You need time alone" she harshly remarks as she gets up to leave.

I felt bad for what I said to her. I did not mean to lash out on her. She meant well. But she should not bring up the fact I had to move on without Michael right now.

I sigh as I roll over on my back. She did not understand how amazing he was. How magical it was to get to know him. To meet my all-time favorite singer. He fell in love with me. And I could not even tell any of my friends.

Michael would not want me moping around the house. But I could not help it.

"Myla there is a phone call for you! Paris" calls gram.

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