STILL WITH YOU (JIKOOK)

1.

Jimin has always been that quiet and shy guy who is isn't used to expressing things and confines the emotions within himself pretending as if everything is fine when it's not. And on top of that being an orphan didn't help at all.

He was abandoned on some random streets out there when he was barely
2 yr old. An orphanage took him in and that marked the beginning of the real struggle he had to face in the upcoming days.

The woman that took him in died when he turned four. He barely remembers her now since it's been 17 years she died but he easily remembers those warm hands that used to caress his head, her love and care for him..he remembers it all except her face.

Shortly after he turned 5, he was sent to another orphanage where he was mistreated, abused and what not. He was made to do cleaning, washing dishes and clothes and after he turned ten he was made to do cooking too. He never went to school, it was not like he didn't want to study and go to school like other normal kids do but it's just that he was not allowed to read and study as those people working in orphanage used to gossip around and say, 'What an orphan will do by studying? It's not like they have a family to look after later on. Heck, they don't even have someone who could they make proud by bringing some fucking medals and certificates in home. I almost forgot they don't even have this thang called HOME......' 

Those words of mockery were more than enough to tear jimin's heart into pieces. He cried for a whole week while going to sleep but then later on he realized that whatever he heard was the truth...a bitter truth. It was indeed true he had no one..not a single soul to be happy for him if he does something good and also not someone who will get sad and heartbroken if something happens to him..He constantly consoled himself to accept the truth and finally he was able to come to this conclusion that nobody cares for him. Even his parents didn't give a shit about him, why would others do??

And the worst started when he turned 16. He found out his sexuality. He found out he was gay as he started crushing upon this guy who used to visit the orphanage with his mom. He was told by someone that the particular woman was none other than the trustee of the orphanage. And then a day came when the trustee and his son stopped visiting. He got more reserved. He used to stare up at the sky to pass the little bit of free time that he had. Rather than that he was always busy in work and so the other orphans in the orphanage. And a rumour popped out of nowhere saying that he is gay. And the rumour was indeed true but he wondered how people got to know about it. May be someone noticed the way how he used to gaze his crush, he thought.

But that was not the main problem. The real problem started when other guys in the orphanage started bullying him for being gay. He was called fag, faggot and a guy even said that jimin's parents knew that he was a fag from the beginning that's why they abandoned him and he felt a heart wrenching pain making it very difficult for him not to cry but at last he cried.. he cried like there's no tomorrow. He bawled his eyes out but wiped his tears thinking whatever that other guy said might be the truth otherwise why would they abandon him.. There was no other reason for their parents to throw him into the streets, right? That was the first ever time he started hating himself for being something so different and unacceptable.

Growing up in such environment where he is required to be obedient, and do any work when he is told to, he never learnt to say no. He has this habit of doing whatever people ask of him.He along with other boys and girls in the orphange were always taught to be patient,calm and nice even if someone behaves badly with them cause apparently that's the only way how a nobody in this world survives. And that is the exact thing he has been doing as he assumes he is nobody afterall.

And gradually he turned 21 without any friends as a total loner with no reading and writing skills. He has never gone outside the ophanage unless accompanying staffs to carry groceries and stuffs.

He had presumed his life would continue as the way it is being unaware of the fact, he had much more to go through....something that'll make it much more worse for his heart to handle.