𝙖𝙣𝙙𝙮'𝙨 𝙢𝙚𝙢𝙚𝙣𝙩𝙤: 10 | 𝙖𝙣𝙙𝙮𝙨𝙘𝙧𝙞𝙗𝙨

❝ love-hate relationship with food ❞

mmmm, it feels nice to crave food.

i ate so much shit last night. mostly cuz i was giving into the cravings, but also partially cuz i wanted to try to gain a bit more weight.

stimulants really do have an impact on my appetite. i go from loving food to loathing it. i've gotten a lil better at eating when i'm on my meds, but i'm still gradually losing weight.

schools breaks are my savior cuz i get to go longer without taking my meds. it allows for the food cravings to really come in.

i do experience hunger on my meds (especially at school leading up to lunch time), but my brain tells me that it's okay not to eat and usually discourages it. i feel full quickly after eating a few bites anyway. i can't tell you how many dinners i had where i literally took only 3-4 bites and said i had enough before quarantine.

i ate so much food last night that my stomach didn't digest a lot of it while i was asleep. idk if that's good or bad, but i've always taken that as i definitely ate a good amount of food the day before.

(10.12.20)