Ch 18

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-4 months later-

4 months without us laughing on the phone and picking out baby names

4 months without her making fun of my circle framed glasses that I wear at night.

4 months without a funny picture sent to the groupchat.

4 months  without my bitch.

It was now may. The warm weather had started.

I rarely ate anything, so that bit of food lasted me months.

I eventually came clean about my whereabouts to sienna. She had bought a lot of my clothes to me. She saw that I couldn't really take care of coco and ace, so she took them back home.

Sienna facetimed me during the funeral. Chris had flown out elenas family out to see her one last time....

In her casket.

Her casket was a pastel purple.

Her favorite color.

There was a pastel pink small casket for the baby.

They were both buried in the same place.

After the funeral, sienna started calling me less and less. I assumed she needed time to mourn so I let her, not pushing anything.

Elenas death bought me to the darkest place of my life. And it was bound to get darker.

I wanted to kill myself everyday, but I knew it didn't make sense. I had to keep going. There was no point in another life being lost. I couldn't leave sienna alone to deal with all of this stress by herself.

These 4 months, along with mourning, betrayal, and loneliness, was filled with alcoholism and drug use.

Now, I knew how to stop. I didn't wanna become who my mom was.

But weed just made the pain a little more bearable. The alcohol just made it forgetful.

I ran out of weed and I was okay I guess. The pain hurt worse, but it was bearable.

"I need some air." I muttered to myself.

I hadn't really been outside since I got here. I mean, there really wasn't anything to go outside for except trash.

I was also running low on food. I still had noens golden credit card, but no car.

"I guess I'll just walk." I muttered.

I had no clue where I was, or where I was going. I was bound to get lost or harmed but I was starving. I took the gun and the knives I had bring and strapped them onto my waistline and upper thigh. I slipped on white lace panties and a matching bra along with a juicy coture velvet brown sweatshirt and juicy coture sweatpants. I grabbed my wallet and my phone and I set off on an adventure to find a store.

I was shocked to see no security guarding the place. There usually was random guards out here during the day.

I walked out of the estate to find a peaceful neighborhood.

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