Loving Jemima

28. Our little family

Jemima

I'd sent max out with his dad to buy some paint, he wanted to paint our room, which meant we had to take all the photos down we'd only just put up. he was getting over excited about this moving in together thing, he was treating this like we were moving into an apartment together, he was so enthusiastic about things once he set his mind to something, Henry kept apologising until I told him he didn't need to. It's the most I'd been made to feel wanted in long time, even with William, when I was with him he made me feel loved and wanted but it didn't feel like it was enough, I never felt confident that I was enough to make him stay, with Max it felt different, when we were apart I knew whole heartedly that he was coming back without him having to tell me a thousand times. It had been a very difficult four months with my health and Matty to deal with, on top of the drama of their crazy fans and max trying to manage his ADHD for the first time in his life completely on his own, but max was still as enthusiastic about our relationship as our first day together.

The boys helped me put his organisation station together, we were standing smiling proudly at it, I was proud of it, I stuck the last label on the seven hooks, one for each of their car and our house keys and one for the family beast as we called that we could all fit comfortably in. The boys all had their own cars now, Max was the last, I think that's why he was so keen when we drove past and it caught his eye, like a little magpie. he'd always tell me stories of young max wanting to be the same as his friends, be the same as the big boys aka Matty and Ed. I stroked my fingers over the label Max's keys smiling. I was proud of my drumsticks, I'd heard his mum complaining at him that he shouldn't be driving while his tics were playing up. She didn't approve of him driving at all, saying his concentration wasnt good enough and he was unsafe behind a wheel. He was upset that evening but wouldn't tell me why, he was just so embarrassed so I didn't tell him I'd over heard her, it wasn't the first time I'd heard her tell him he was too mentally impaired to drive. If that was the case they wouldn't have given him a licence and he wouldn't have passed his test with ease first time.

"Excellent job Kiddo, I'm impressed, you've thought of everything." Matty kissed the back of my head
"Baby I'm back, I went with blue and purple, I got some pink as well just incase, Emmy?"
"In here Max" matty called back to him "wait, I'm coming" he hurried out covering Max's eyes leading him and Henry in.
"What's going on."
"My amazing little sister made something for you, well all of us, but it's very heavily max influenced. Ta da!" Matty revealed our master piece.

"What am I looking at" Max asked confused
"It's our organisation station" milo wiggled his jazz hands to try and big it up. They'd tried calendars and to do lists before, he just couldn't manage them, he'd always had someone telling him where he needed to be and when. He had his own personal PA on tour. Max scratched his neck looking it over.
"I don't understand, why is it mine?"
"It's ours mate.....but it's all ADHD friendly. Max friendly." Matty patted his shoulder
"You did this?" Max asked me annoyed, I nodded shyly "why would you put my ADHD on display like this Emmy, you know...."

"Max Calm down" Ed warned him "hear her out dude, it's a good idea. She's put a lot of effort into this for you."
"You might as well have a neon sign saying look at max the loser with the broken fucking brain for everyone to see! Why would you do this to me! I thought you fucking understood me! You said you loved me for me! That you didn't want me to change like everyone else does! why the hell would you humiliate me like this Emmy!" Max stomped off to the garden, Henry going to chase after him
"Henry can I? I'm not upset with him, I promise. Matty stay" I followed max out finding him pacing by the pool.

"Hey" I smiled at him forcing him into a hug by holding onto his waist. Max looked away trying not to look at me. "You went with blue and purple huh?"
"Don't" he huffed
"Will you come and just look at it, it's for all of us, not just you, I've even got just Jemima stuff on there. I'm being brave, will you be brave with me?"
"God I can't resist you. I'm embarrassed"
"I know but you don't need to be, like you keep telling me I don't need to be. You help me and I help you remember? Let us help you max"