50 Shades of Ariana

48

The drive to the hospital was frightening for me.

My baby wasn't moving and now I'm feeling pain?

My heart started to well up and the thought of losing her. I couldn't even fathom losing my baby girl.

I tried to push the thought back, but I knew I had to prepare myself for the possibility.

Danielle parked under the Emergency carport and helped me in a wheelchair.

She wheeled me to the receptionist and rambled on about how I was attacked the night before and had to run and how I'm hunched over in pain.

They brought me to the back and let Danielle go park her car.

They immediately checked the baby and hooked me up to machines.

The nurse ran her ultrasound wand over my stomach looking for the heartbeat.

I could hear mines, but I was looking for my baby's.

Seconds felt like hours and I was preparing myself to hear the worst, but there I heard.

BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!

My baby girl's heart was loud and clear.

I felt relief come over me as the nurse seemed to be relieved too.

"I just had to tell a couple there baby's heartbeat had stopped and I don't think I could bare telling you too." She sighed in relief.

"We are going to hook you up and run some tests just to make sure everything is clear." She tells me and then walks out.

I sat in the bed all alone. I continued to caress my stomach and stare.

"Mommy is so sorry she is bringing you into this world."

I felt tears well up.

"You don't deserve this dysfunctional life. Mommy can't even give you better because she doesn't have better."

I felt the tears roll down my face.

"I'm going to do my very best to protect you. I love you."

I'm snapped out of my emotional moment as a panicked Ariana busts in with Danielle angrily behind her and a nurse trying to calm them both down.

"Baby are you good? Is the baby alright? They called me to notify and I rushed here." She comes up to caress me, but Danielle slaps her hand away.

"No! You don't get to do that you bitch!" Danielle booms.

Ariana doesn't even react, but turns to Danielle and stares her down.

"You put her here! You stressed the fuck out of her and even after all this she still wants your mental ass back! You deserve a stray jacket and meds you cuck!" The nurse escorts Danielle out and gently closes the door.

I'm sure Ariana didn't react because either she knew she was right or because she didn't also want to be escorted out.

Ariana may be "mental", but she isn't dumb.

She turns back to me and caresses the side she slapped me on which was probably darker than four days ago.

"I was told to stay away, but I was so scared that you lost the baby and I was the root. I just want to make sure you both are okay and then I'll leave."

I didn't speak, but just turned away to the monitor that showed our baby who was starting to move and her heartbeat loud and clear.

She was the only thing keeping me going at the moment and her heartbeat made this all worth it.

I looked down and smile as I see my stomach moving as she moved around.

"I missed you moving munchkin." I say as I rub my stomach.

"She hasn't been moving?" Ariana asks as she stares at her moving on the monitor.

"No. She scared me because she became so quiet since that night." I sigh and turn my body towards the window.

Ariana noticed my sudden down behavior and gets behind me on the bed.

No matter how bad Ariana got, her compassion never lowered.

It had a powerful radiation and as down as I was, she held me and I felt better.

"I'm doing my best and its very slow, but I want to be better by her birth." Ariana whispers as she rubs my stomach.

"She deserves it." I mumble.

"You too." Ariana pecks my neck and lays in the crook of my neck.

The door opens and we both snap our neck to the door.

The doctor grinned, but urged Ariana to get up.

She does and stands by my side.

"From what I've seen, you both seem very healthy, BUT we can tell she is in distress which caused some Braxton Hicks. Mom." She points at me.

"You are getting close to birthing and we do not want to induce an early one so no stress zone up until she's ready to come. Momma." She points at Ariana.

"Try to be comforting. Help her relax. Make them both feel good. Treat mom to a massage or any other comforting ideas. Treat baby with some music or talk times. Throw her favorite craving in there." The doctor chuckles.

"Your baby is still healthy otherwise so I know everything else is great and y'all are the idea of perfect parents to me. I will still be keeping her overnight, just to be completely sure." The doctor gives a warm smile as we thank her as she walks out.

Ariana looks at me and takes my hand.

"I'll keep my visits short and maybe you can visit so we can make this last trimester the best?" Ariana suggests.

"I don't know Ariana.." I say feeling overwhelmed again.

Ariana could tell and quickly kissed my hands.

"Look I know I'm both a negative and a positive effect for you, but we have to make this work somehow for baby girl. If I'm having a episode, I will make sure to stay away. I know which sessions are my critical ones, so I'll know when to stay away."

I nod.

"This sounds great, but I doubt Danielle will let you in her home at least unsupervised."

Ariana looks down.

"Yeah I know, but that's actually good. Small steps."

I grin and Ariana pecks my lips.

"I'm staying tonight. Just to make sure everything is fine."

I nod and watch her pull the reclining chair next to my bed and sit.

She gives me a long and slow kiss before attempting to get comfortable in the recliner.

My grin drops as I look at her.

She looked so broken and clearly she wasn't eating like she should for these past few days.

She seemed to have bruises from maybe her episodes.

She also looked to be exhausted as she seemed to fall asleep nearly immediately after lying down.

She couldn't live without me..