THE HIDDEN HALF

Chapter 39: Will you be courageous enough?

*** CHAPTER 39 ***

Sanskaar paces up and down the dining hall, peeping inside the kitchen from time to time as he awaits Swara. He has been trying to talk to her for last half an hour but all Swara does is ignore him. And that ignorance has been tugging at his heart so ruthlessly as if it is being torn apart into shreds. He does not know what is bothering her but ever since their last conversation, she has been acting quite strange and is trying to keep as much distance as possible from him.

His pace increases as Swara finally comes out of the kitchen with a bowl of curd in her hand.

Sanskaar: Swara, I need to talk to you about something.

Swara: I’m busy, Sanskaar!

Sanskaar: But it’s really very important. I need you to see something.

Swara: Then why don’t you ask your Anshika to see it? Why don’t we just end this cat and mouse game here?

Sanskaar: Look, Swara. This is not about the game. This is something really very important.

Swara: I don’t think I will be of any help, Sanskaar.

Swara paces up towards the dining area but Sanskaar holds her upper arm trying to pull her towards him. What neither of them had been expecting is that in an attempt to pull herself away, Swara loses the hold on the bowl and all the curd lay splashed over the floor in just a matter of few minutes. She glares at Sanskaar expecting him to cower back but to her astonishment he glares back at her. Realizing that this argument is going to take them nowhere, Swara turns around to leave. For the betterment of Sanskaar and of everyone else, she needs to keep herself and her feelings at bay. She does not deserve him.

But before she can take a step further, Sanskaar holds her arm rather tightly, and pulls her along with him away from everyone else and inside his room.

Swara: What are you doing, Sanskaar? Just… just let me go.

Sanskaar: Don’t shout, Swara, if you don’t want to create a scene early in the morning.

Swara swats his hand away as Sanskaar bolts the door of the room and glares at him.

Swara: What are you doing?

Sanskaar: (pushes her against the wall) Exactly! Exactly, Swara! What are you doing?

Swara: W-What have I done?

Sanskaar: Now, should I explain that as well? Ever since our last conversation you have been avoiding me. You are not even looking at me, let alone talking, and when I am saying that I have something important to talk about, you are not even ready to listen. What is wrong with you, Swara?

Swara: (chuckles humorlessly) Everything. Every damn thing is wrong about me, Sanskaar. I don’t think I am good enough for you. I… I…

Sanskaar: And who said that you could decide it?

Swara: Isn’t it obvious? You see… this life of mine is going to take me nowhere. I’m like an endless abyss, Sanskaar, the deeper you delve into it, more you will find it difficult to breathe, difficult to leave. Trust me, I’m not the best option you have.

Sanskaar: (holds her cheeks) I love you the way you are, Swara! No complaints, no demands! It is you who I want.

Swara: (pulling his hands away) No, Sanskaar. It’s… it’s not possible. This is the best for all of us. For you. For everyone else. We have to do this.

Sanskaar: W-What do you mean?

Swara: (taking a deep breath) You deserve someone better, Sanskaar.