Dreamcrash

Twenty One: Home

"I- I don't know!" I stutter. "I don't know how we know each other, or what I helped him with, or anything!"

"Like hell you do," Pen snarls, eyelights a deep red. "You can't just forget about something like that. Even if the memories are suppressed, they'll come back eventually. But that doesn't matter. What does is the fact that for whatever reason, Three thanked you. Meaning you helped him. Meaning you helped the enemy."

"I don't know how or why I might have done that, but-"

"But what?" Patch glares at me. "It doesn't matter what reason. It doesn't stop the fact that you helped Three, and by extension, Thread."

"Look, I'm sorry!" I say, panicking as Patch's knife gets closer to me. "Is there anything I can do to make it up?"

Patch stops and looks at Pen. They seem to exchange a conversation through their eyes, and then Pen nods.

"Yeah, you can stay here."

I freeze. Stay here? As in stay in Star Village? I can't do that! The whole reason I left the village was to find Dream, and I can't stop looking yet!

But if you were really looking for Dream, wouldn't you have tried a bit harder? A part of my head whispered. 

"Sorry, but no, the whole reason I came to you guys was to find Dream! And I still need to do that!"

"We can keep looking for now, so a Code Virus doesn't spread. But I think you've helped enough, Night," Pen says coldly as he motions for Patch to get off me. "You're staying here now, and if I find you in my Art Dome again, we're going to have a long talk." Something about the emphasis on his words makes me think it won't be as much of a talk and more of me getting thrown out of the dome. "Come on Patch. We have better things to do."

Patch gets off me and his knife disappears. He follows Pen and Pen teleports away.

"Patch, please, I just want to find my brother!"

Patch pauses. He sighs, and I can feel he's exhausted. "Look, Night, so do I. But if Three's running around and you're helping him, I can't allow it." His voice is soft but sad. "I'm not angry at you, Night. I know you can be a good person if you try. I'm just... disappointed." He pauses, breaths out, and teleports away.

Just disappointed.

Disappointed you can't be more helpful. You can't be better. You tried, and you failed.

You can't be normal. You don't deserve to be happy. It's your fault we're like this. It's your fault all these bad feelings exist. They shouldn't. You shouldn't.

The voices from over the years start to drip into my mind. "Don't let it get to you," I mutter instinctively.

You're just a mistake.

"Keep your head high, don't let it bother you."

No one needs you. If you were gone, things would be better.

"Don't let it get to you."

You shouldn't have come back.

"Don't."

No wonder Dream disappeared.

"D..don't..." My voice cracks. I break. I got a chance to save Dream and blew it. There's no going back.

"Why would you want to?"

A familiar voice slips into my head, a memory I can't remember.

"Well... they're my friends, and I have to save my brother."

That was me. I said that at some point. But to who?

"Are you sure they're your friends? After all, they could be hiding a lot from you."

"Why would they do that?"

Pen and Patch were hiding a lot, weren't they? How many secrets did they never mention? 

"Ah, forget I said anything. I just know someone who had a bad experience like that."

"You did? Who?"

"Their name was Path."

Path.

Path.

 I feel a shock run through me and various things click into place. Path was Pen's friend, and I thought only Pen knew him, but the person I was talking to wasn't Pen. Who else knew Path? No one else I could name.... wait, Thread had to do with Path's disappearance, but something told me it wasn't Thread I was talking to, so that leaves one option. The only person Thread would talk to. Three.

I was talking to him. It almost seemed like we were friends. He tried to turn me against the Protectors. I had refused and gotten away, but not before he messed with my memories. I remembered. Not all of it, but a lot. Most importantly, I remembered I did help him with something. I don't know what, but I did.

Pen and Patch were right.

I curl up in a ball, wishing I could just disappear. Normally, when I felt like this, Dream would come to cheer me up. I wanted Dream to curl up next to me, like he would do so long ago, and tell me everything would be alright. I wanted him to hold my hand and flare his aura so I would smile. I wanted to hear his voice and see his warm smile. I wanted my brother back so badly.

I get up and start walking, trying to shake myself out of my thoughts, but the more I struggled the more I was dragged down. I didn't pay attention to anyone or anything, just the fact that I had blown my chance to get my brother back. Patch and Pen said they would keep looking, but would they really?

I keep walking. I don't know where I'm headed. I look around at my home. It doesn't feel like home anymore. As I walk, rain starts to fall. It reminds me of that storm, so long ago, after I got my cast off. Back then, I thought stopping the corruption would be good, and everyone would be happy. But if I knew what would happen then, I might have actually let it happen. At least I'd still have Dream, even if we fought. I'd take that over no Dream at all. 

Just like Pen said, my actions have consequences. 

I eventually find myself at the Tree of Feelings. The ash has long since disappeared, but a tiny bit of the stump remained. I touched it, missing the days when I'd sit reading the book out loud for my mom's spirit in the tree to hear.

Oh my god. Mom. What happened to her after the tree burnt down? I try talking to the tree.

"Mom. It's me, it's Night. Are you here?"

Silence.

"Mom. It's Nightmare. It's me."

Still silent. She's gone, I can tell. I feel... empty. I'm not sad, or angry, or anything. Just empty. The rain fell down my skull, on my back, on everything. Thunder booms in the distance. If Dream was here, he'd be so scared. I'd wrap him up in the banner we tied around the tree. Speaking of, where had that gone? I look around and catch a glimpse of something yellow. I grab it and see it's the banner, dull and burnt from the fire. 

"You should wear it. So you're safe from all the villagers and glitches and everything bad out there."

Dream's voice echos in my head. I wrap the banner around me. It makes me feel safe.

"Hey, Night?"

I turn around. Seed is staring at me from the ground. "I...uh... heard what happened with Pen and Patch."

"It doesn't matter. They were right anyway."

"No, that's not why I'm here. I can travel through AUs kinda well, without being detected by them, and I told them I would be in Crashtale right now, so I have time."

I give him a look of confusion.

"What I'm trying to say is I know where Dream is. And I want to take you there."

End of Part Two