Captured and Tainted (SERIE FEROCI 2)

Chapter Twenty-One

I'm expecting a hard slap from her, and she did slap me. But the look in her face is much painful than her slap, seeing her eyes dwelled in tears and her quivering lips... It makes me feel like I'm the worst friend alive, and I guess I really am.

“What was that, Angel?! Why did you kiss my boyfriend?!”

Napatungo ako at napahawak sa braso ko. I avoided her gaze. I don't know what to say... Gusto ko na lang mawala na parang bula sa harapan niya. I bit my lower lip and calmed my nerves, sobrang lamig ng mga kamay ko.

“J-Jaze, let's not talk here, d-doon tayo sa living room. Please,” I murmured and glanced at Zakarius who's peacefully sleeping on my bed without knowing what's happening right now. I inhaled deeply and looked at Jaze again.

Hindi na siya nagsalita at padabog na lumabas ng silid ko. Napakagat ako sa ibabang labi ko upang pakalmahin ang sarili ko.

I don't have any other choice but to face this, hindi puwedeng takasan ko ito habang buhay. Alam ko rin na malaki ang posibidad na hindi na ako patawarin ni Jaze.

I took a deep breath once again and followed Jaze. Nasa living room siya habang nakatingin pa rin nang masama sa akin. Ang sakit sa dibdib na makita siyang ganito kagalit sa 'kin, pero sana naisip ko 'to bago pa ako mahulog nang tuluyan kay Zakarius.

I'm a foolish bitch, I know.

“You know I've always treated you like a sister, Angel. Itinuring kitang pamilya na maagang ipinagkait sa 'kin! Alam mo rin kung gaano ko kamahal si Zakarius, a-alam mo 'yan noon pa lang!” her voice broke and she finally bursts into tears. Nanginig ang kalamnan ko nang makita siyang lumuluha, nanghina ang mga tuhod ko kasabay ng pagbagsak ng mga luha ko.

Naglakad ako papalapit sa kanya at sinubukang hawakan ang kamay niya ngunit agad niya akong itinulak palayo.

“I-I'm sorry, Jaze. I tried to stop myself, I tried to suppress my own feelings. Believe me, p-please.”

I froze when she slapped me again. I just gulped and endure the pain it caused. This is nothing compared to her pain right now. I should endure this, this is all my fault.

I realized that I'm also weak when it comes to her. My heart is throbbing with pain, seeing her cry like this... seeing her cry like this because of me breaks my heart. I ruined her, I'm the one who ruined our friendship.

“You didn't do your best, Angel! Ginusto mo rin! Wala kang pakialam sa pagkakaibigan natin dahil kung meron, h-hindi mo gagawin sa 'kin 'to!” she shouted. Namumula ang mukha niya habang patuloy sa pagluha. Lalo akong nasasaktan dahil kitang kita ko ang sakit sa mga mata niya.

I covered my mouth to fight my sobs. Pakiramdam ko bibigay na ang katawan ko dahil sa panghihina anumang oras. It feels like I finally reached my weakest point, Jaze is my weakest point. I don't know if I can still continue without her, she completed me, she's the friend I ever wished for... and I did this to her, I betrayed her.

Jaze wiped her tears. She inhaled deeply, she calmed herself, and looked directly at my eyes.

“A-aminin mo sa 'kin, ano'ng nararamdaman mo para kay Zak? Aminin mo sa akin, Angel,” sabi niya sa matigas na boses.

Natigilan ako, nanatili akong nakatitig sa kanya. Hindi ko alam kung ano ba ang dapat kong sabihin. Buong buhay ko palagi akong handa sa bawat tanong na ibinabato sa 'kin... Ngayon lang ako nahirapan sumagot nang ganito, pakiramdam ko sa isasagot ko nakasalalay ang pananatili ng pagkakaibigan namin.

“I love him, Jaze. I-I love him so much... I love Zakarius Cavalcante so damn much,” I murmured and closed my eyes tightly.

I chose to be honest with her and with my feelings. Ilang taon kong kinimkim ang nararamdaman ko sa tuwing nakikita ko silang magkasama ni Zakarius, ang tagal kong kinimkim ang totoong nararamdaman ko at nagpanggap na masaya para sa kanila.