~ take it back~

Chapter ~17~

I wake up at 5:30. I see tommy asleep on my bed. I stand up and walk to my closet. I grab out a black dress and a black sweater. Today's a Thursday I'm pretty sure the cops went over to the school and told them we wouldn't be able to make it. I grab some pink under wear and pink bra to go with it. I walk to the bathroom. I slip off my clothing and jump in the shower.

I walk out and dry off my body. I slip on my underclothes and my dress. I blow dry my hair knowing it might wake up the wrest of the house. I grab my curling iron and curl my hair. I walk back to my room and throw my clothes in the hamper. I do my makeup. I walk to the living room and see jimmy and Dutch awake. It's now 6:30. "Good morning" I say to them. They turn around and look my way. "Good morning" they say. I go sit down in between them. "How do you feel" Dutch ask's. "Mentally I'm dying. Emotionally I'm not here and physically I feel fine I guess" I say to them.

"I'm gonna head home a grab mine and Dutches suits" jimmy says. I shake my head and he walks out. "So you two live together" I say to him. "Yeah" he responds back. "Where's Bobby" I say to him. "He left last night" Dutch says. I shake my head. I see tommy walk out of my room. "Good morning" I say to him. "Good morning beautiful" he says back.

He comes sits next to me. "If you guys want to take showers it down the hall" I say to them. "I see tommy give me a kiss and walk to the bathroom. I see Johnny come in. Wearing a black suit and another suit in his hands. "Where is tommy" he says. "The bathroom" I say back. 10 minute later he returns. He sits next to me. "Hi" he says. I turn my attention towards him. "Hi" I say back. He grabs me and hugs me. "I'm sorry" he says to me. "Don't even bother" I say to him. "She really liked you guys" I say again. Jimmy walks in holding dutchs suit. "Thanks man" Dutch says as jimmy hands it to him.

20 minutes later tommy walks out wearing his suit. I smile at him. He smiles back. Dutch walks into the bathroom as Bobby comes in wearing his suit. "How do you feel this morning beautiful" he says. "Mentally I'm dying. Emotionally I'm not here and physically I feel fine I guess" I say again. He just looks down at the floor.  "What time is it" i say to them. "It's 7:00" Johnny says.  I stand up and walk to my room. I grab my laptop and buy all the uniforms. The school is  paying for it anyway.

"It should arrive Friday night" I say to myself. I close it. I walk out to see Dutch coming out of the bathroom in His suit. Bobby makes his way to the bathroom. I smile at Dutch. I'm just trying to keep myself happy. I hate this. I miss my mother. No matter what I do I just can't.
I walk back into my room. I grab my black purse. I put my glasses and my phone inside of it.

I hear the bathroom door open. I grab my black heals and slip them on. I put on my diamond necklace my mom got me. I fix my dress. I grab my house key and my car keys. I put them inside my purse. I'm not taking my car but you just you never know. I take a deep breath and walk out.

I see all the guys standing. I see Dutch and jimmy struggling with their ties. I walk up to them and help Dutch with his tie. "Thank you" he says. I smile at him. I walk towards jimmy and help him with his tie. He smiles at me and I smile back. "You guys ready" a voice says. We turn around and its the officer. "Mhm" I say. We walk out and I lock up the house. Mrs. LaRusso  and Daniel Come walking out. "Cmon" Daniel says grabbing my hand. We walk down the stairs and into the car the cops got for us. I put on my glasses.

We get  inside as I'm seated next to Daniel and Johnny. I take a deep breathe. I let a few tears slip. "We are here" I hear the cop say. We get out of the car.

(Play 'close your eyes' by RHODES' again)

I walk towards where everyone is standing. "Joyce was an amazing women and an amazing mother. She always put smiles on peoples faces no matter the circumstances. She loved everyone. She loved her daughter. She always made people laugh. Even in serious situations" the guy says. After about an hour of everyone saying  goodbye and putting roses on her casket.

I walk towards it as everyone walks back to their cars. I take a deep breath and grab one of the roses not to mention yellow. Yellow was her favorite color. I lay it on their. "You know when I was little and I was riding my bike down the street and I fell off of it and cut my knee..you were the first person I called for..I miss you mother and it'll never stop" I say as a tear falls down. "I know your in a better place. Looking down on me I just wish I had you to walk me down the isle since dads not here" I say letting out a sob. "Your my yellow mother. I love you so much" I say.  I let out another sob.

"I will never be the same without you mother..I blame myself for not being there for you! I'm so sorry" I say.
"I will never be the same without you" I say.  "You were the most amazing mother ever" I let the tears slip. "They asked if I wanted to go back with dad but I said no" I say crying. "You were my safe place" I say breaking down.

"I miss you" I say again. "I can't believe it mother..your gone and it's all my fault" I say. I take a deep breath. "You left without a ' I love  you' or a 'goodbye'" I say kneeling down. "It's all my fault" I whisper. "You were the most amazing person and now I- I don't have anyone" I say crying. "I'll never let go" I say again. "You'll be everything that ill ever need till the day I die" I whisper. "I love you" I say
(Stop the song)

Hope you like it! I cried!