BATIM Oneshots

Yoooooooooooooooooooooooo :]

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Shawn: I wish I had a super tight-knit group of friends that I could fright crime with

Wally: I wish I had a super tight-knit group of friends that I could commit crimes with

Sammy: I wish I had a super tight-knit group of friends

Norman: I wish I had friends

Henry: I wish I could knit..

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Sammy: I am a complex person with complex emotions, like 'tired' and 'food' and even the rarer third emotion 'axe'..

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Grant: so apparently the 'bad vibes' I've been feeling are actually server psychological distress...

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Henry, finds a lost one crying the the corner: *awkwardly pats on back* it's okay.

Henry: you'll learn to do that on the inside soon

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Sammy: just saw two elementary school kids in a fight, and as an adult, I stepped in

Joey: good for yo-

Sammy: they didn't stand a chance

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Wally: I always sleep with a knife under my pillow

Jack: weak, I sleep with a gun

Shawn: you're both pathetic

Wally: really? What do you sleep with then?

Shawn: Grant.

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Sammy, about Joey: I hate him with every inch of my body.

Norman: that's not a lot of inches

Sammy: >:[

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Wally: today I saw Grant cry for like, 5-6 minutes then an alarm went off and he suddenly stopped crying then went straight back to work...

Grant: it's called time management, Wally.

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Jack: hey Henry

Henry: yes?

Jack: can a person breath inside a washing machine while it's on??

Henry:

Henry: where's Wally???!

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Sammy: blue isn't even a natural colour for food. Name one blue food.

Susie: blueberry

Sammy: bluEBERRIES A FUCKING PURPLE

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Henry: Wally I'm not mad...

Wally, already tears up: DON'T YOU FUCKING SAY IT-

Henry: I'm just disappointed.

Wally, sobbing: *goes to storage closest and locks himself in for 3 hours*

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Grant: sorry it took me so long to get to work. I had a breakdown on the way here.

Joey: oh, I hope your cars okay.

Grant: car?

Joey:

Grant:

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Hello :]

I'm not dead.

Just looking for a will to live ;)

I hope everyone had a good Christmas and new year!!

I'll get a real chapter out soon :}