STEFANO {Published/Sample Only}

Giorgia Wedding: The End

I shook the towel over my hair, watching Mark from the corner of my eyes as he walked out the bathroom, bending over to his suitcase. We'd been at it all yesterday, all night, all morning, all shower- but I was still so fucking insatiable.

In a flash he was dressed, already sitting in the chair and tying his shoes. "I still can't get over how gorgeous that wedding was!" He called over. "It was like a dream! We should get married here too!"

I slid my shirt up my arms, laughing as I started on the buttons.

"Why are you laughing?"

"You're funny," I laughed again.

"Okay, so no ballroom. Maybe the park, under our cherry blossoms."

I flashed my eyes over, searching the table beside him for the shit he must be smoking. "What the fuck are you talking about?"

"Us, getting married, one day."

Married?! Us! "Jesus Christ- I'm not marrying you!" I was laughing again, heading across the hotel room to grab my pants. Married, he was funny or fucking crazy.

"You're laughing at the thought of marrying me?" He was getting serious, angry- you had to be fucking kidding me right now.

"What more do you want from me? I agreed to be your boyfriend, that's bad enough." He knew what married meant right, we had just heard the priest say husband and wife. Not to mention I had a thousand fucking emails and ignored calls after the wedding. I started laughing again, rolling my eyes with each one.

"I'm sorry what!" Oh here we go, fucking pissy for no reason. "Boyfriend is bad enough..."

"You know what I mean." I stepped into my briefs, reaching for my pants next.

"No, actually I don't."

"Wait..." I dropped back to the bed, sitting right on the edge, facing him, watching as he stood from his chair. "You're not being fucking serious, right? You don't seriously want to get married?"

"Of course I do! What did you think- that I'd be okay with this forever? Coming and going- literally. Love, leave, love, leave? I'm tired of going back and forth, happy to depressed from missing you. I thought after your family knew, after New York knew that you'd be ready. Because I'm ready for the next step Stefano." He always wanted more, always fucking pushing me. "I don't need anything big, just a small ceremony, me in a black Gucci tux- of course, family and a few friends, a..."

He was serious! Really fucking serious! I was up, pacing. No. What the fuck was he thinking! A wedding! He had to be joking, fucking with me of course. "Stop!" I laughed, throwing my hand up to stop him. "Don't ruin an amazing trip with a bad joke!"

"A bad joke..." He stepped back, eyes downcast, staring at his feet as he shifted his weight back and forth. "We get so far Stefano and then you laugh at me! I don't want to spend the rest of my life like this, I'm not okay with spending weeks and months away from you! Are you okay with that? Always having to say goodbye? You... you don't want a future with me?"

"Of course I do! But I'm good with this, this is comfortable for me! Now can we stop this nonsense and go get breakfast!"

"No! I'm not good with this! What about what I want! I'm always waiting for you Stefano! For almost two years I've pushed aside my needs for yours- waiting, sitting on the sidelines. Which was fine because I love you, but when do I get what I want? What I need? When does the focus shift from you to me, or even us- what we need? I want a husband! I want to marry the man I love! Just like your sister married the man she loved!"

"Exactly! Jesus! We can't get married! What church is gonna open their doors for us? It's I now pronounce you husband and wife! That shit's not for us!"

"Not us! Not us! Why, because I'm a man and you're a man? Words can be changed!"

"But how ridiculous would that fucking sound!" Did he not hear himself right now! Throwing a fucking fit, shaking his head, his back now turned from me. Ruining a perfect morning. "I can't believe you're doing this right now!" I chucked my pants against the wall. "Look at everything I've done for you! Stop fucking pushing me into more shit I don't want to do!"

"What you've done for me?" He repeated, slowly twisting back to face me. "Stefano, you should have been doing that for you! I thought you wanted to come out."

"Fuck I did, I just..."

"I can't keep fighting this fight- the world vs. me. You're so caught up in what you think they want that you can't see what I need. It shouldn't be me vs. the world Stefano- I should be your world. Because you're mine. I was willing to uproot my whole life to move here, so you didn't have to leave your family. My world is you- you are my sun, my moon, my axis. I thought maybe I was yours too."

"You are, fuck... but I... I can't be your husband and I can't have a husband."

He started towards me, stopping close enough that I could see the water clumping his bushy lashes and glossing his eyes. "Why don't I get to walk down the aisle to the man I love? Why don't I get to commit my life to him, in front of my family and friends?" He sucked in a deep, loud breath. "Why am I being punished for loving you! I can't get married?! Our love is less?! My heart doesn't count?! Why? Look at me Stefano! Look me in the fucking eyes and tell me what I did that was so wrong, tell me why I don't deserve what everyone else has! Tell me! Now!" He screamed, tears bursting from his eyes. "Tell me what's fucking wrong with me! Why the man I love doesn't deem me worthy!"

Shit... I reached for him but he smacked my hands away. "Nothing..."

He sank his face into his hands, rubbing his fingers over his eyes, smearing the tears as he wiped them away. "You not fully accepting yourself means you can never accept me. You can't love me with all you have, because there's a piece of you that still considers me your dirty little secret."

"That's not tr..."

"I want more Stefano! I can't keep sinking into a depression every time I leave you, it's a roller coaster I don't want to ride anymore. I want what everyone has! I'm traditional- I want a husband to come home to every night- one who wears a matching ring- the whole gambit! You know what, I want a white picket fence and kids one day too. I want a family- I deserve a family. And I don't care who snickers on the street, I don't care what the world wants- because I get one fucking life Stefano and I'm gonna make it worth living!"

"Kids?" I laughed inadvertently, and he let out another tear.

"Maybe it's me." He walked away, plucking up his clothes, his shoes, chucking them at his suitcase. "You've confused sex with love and you don't really love me. You're just comfortable." He started packing his bag, grabbing more and more of his shit. "Maybe you need to get out there, find someone that makes you want more. Find someone you love so much that you forget about the world around you because that man becomes your world. That you don't think twice about a future because you've already pictured it, you want it too. I think I was just your first, not your last. We're in two different places, you just want to play house- I want a real one." He pulled the handle from his bag, taking off to the hotel room door.

"Where are you going? You can't just leave! We have plans, the trip!" What was happening...

"I can't," he grumbled, shaking his head no. "I can't keep going back and forth. Especially knowing that that's all it'll ever be." He reached for the door, pulling it open and wheeling the bag out. "I'm leaving, and this time I won't be coming back. I have to do this for me- for once it's about what Mark needs."

"Mark!" I started towards him, searching the room for the pants I'd chucked somewhere. "Baby, stop!"

"No, goodbye Stefano." He stepped into the hall, letting the door go. "This is the end."

The End.
⭐️Book 2 Preview in next chapter- to give you a bit of relief.
⭐️ Available on Amazon