Amanda: Is This Love?

chapter 7

Its been 3 months since Phile has started school, today is her last day for the first term meaning we are getting her first progress report. She's very excited, she has a ballet event when schools reopen so during the school holidays we have ballet classes to attend.

Well the past 3 months Zweli has been a pest, he shows up at the office claiming that he has something job related to discuss with me when really its just his way of annoying me. He sends me flowers occasionally with cheesy messages attached to it. Not to mention how he randomly calls me even in the evenings just to check up on me. He's an amazing guy that I'll admit but I'm just not about relationships. He's a real gentleman also, he brings lunch at times and its always my favourites.

I'm at work, i dropped Phile off at school as they're having a end of term class party which will only take an hour then I'll fetch her she'll be spending the rest of the day with me at work. She's dressed in casual clothes today since its the last day, my baby was so happy.

Its almost knock off time for her so i grab my bag and drive to her school, Mrs Adams hands me the progress report and my baby is number 2 in the class top 3 she even got a little trophy and a certificate, she was so excited. We drove to McDonald's first to get her a meal that she'll eat for lunch then drove to the office.

My baby is such a chatterbox and I'm desperately trying to get work done.its lunch time, there's a knock on the door, it's Zweli, he walks in holding a food paper bag. "Afternoon Ms A" he has also joined Lindz in calling me Ms A, i smile and greet back. Well Zweli and i barely ever talk about our personal lives and honestly i havent really let him in to a point that he'd know about my daughter. All he knows is my name and surname as well as what i do for a living.

Phile runs and sits on my lap, well she's shy at times especially around new faces. "Well hello there princess" Zweli greets her, she just smiles shyly and waves at him. "And what is your name?" He asks, she first looks at me for approval before she responds "my name is Ngiphile Mthethwa, what's your name?" Now shes still a diva, a shy diva at that.

He chuckles a bit "i am uncle Zweli, nice to meet you princess Ngiphile" she giggles then buries her head on my chest. "This is my 6 year old daughter, she's my life" he smiles "lovely to finally get to know a part of your life"

Phile finally losens up when she notices that Zweli bought slapchips, my baby loves good old township style slapchips, she was chatting the whole time asking Zweli questions, she even went as far as asking if Zweli has a daughter of his own. "Well ladies it was nice spending time with you, i need to rush back to work now" he says standing up while fixing his suit.

Zweli is a very clean guy, he dresses well too, he's well built, not buff but a bit on the chubby side(tyler perry type of chubby), he's caramel skinned, has nice cute lips with a moustache and a goatie beard, he has nice perfectly aligned teeth and has a wave hair cut, yes! A whole grown man with waves.

While he was walking towards the door Phile calls out for him "uncle Zweli!" He turns back "are you going to come to my ballet rehearsal on saturday?" Trust my baby to create unnecessary awkwardness, he looks at me then back at Phile "yes princess, I'll be there!" She smiles then "see you on Saturday uncle Zweli" she blows him a kiss before he walks out.

After work,princess and i drive to Noxolo's place, she invited us for dinner. "Hey ladies" i greet as i find them all sitting near the fireplace sipping on some champagne. "Hey girl, look at you,you seem happy" Nox says. "Phile would you like anything to eat baby?" Noxolo asks, "no thanks Aunty, we ate chips with uncle zweli" she blurts out, the ladies give me questioning looks "go upstairs and play with the others Phile" she runs upstairs. "So?" Ntokozo asks, i just sip on my champagne. "Ha.a mogirl spill the tea!" Mpho jumps in.

"Zweli is that GM motors guy, he has been coming to my office for quite sometime now, he calls, we've been talking for almost 4 months now" i add. They scream and theres a whole lot of commotion, i mean i didnt say that i liked Zweli or anything like that.

"When are we meeting him?" They ask almost at the same time. "Guys Zweli and i are not together" i say then continue sipping on my glass. We spent the evening chatting about random things before it was time for each off us to get going.

My baby and i decided to sleep in my bedroom tonight."mommy" she's busy braiding my hair apperently. My hair has grown a bit and its time i remove the  hair dye. "Yes Phile" she keeps quiet for sometime "is uncle Zweli going to be my daddy?" She asks, this somehow breaks my heart, i guess the more she grows older there'll always be the question of who her daddy is. "But baby, Khulu is also your daddy" i respond, she starts crying "whats wrong baby" i take her into my arms. "Kayla and Lebo laugh at me when i say khulu is my daddy, they say that Khulu is old to be my dad" i hush her until she falls asleep.

Looking at her sleeping there next to me and thinking about all that she has just asked me, it breaks my heart and i just find myself crying, i want the best for my baby , i want her to never feel pain, its so unfortunate that i cannot bring her a dad, i cannot because i myself do not even know what her dad looks like. I sometimes question God as to why things had to turn out the way they did, did i ever wrong anyone? Did i really deserve what happened?